10 year old daughter who cant get to sleep?

Question

my daughter has difficulty in getting to sleep - we have tried lavender oil on pillow, natural drops under tongue before bed and also warm baths and warm milk. Se has only started this in the last 5 months - nothing has changed in our household. She is a high strung child and waits for 4am every morning till dad goes to work to come in my bed with me. My concern is that she isn't getting enough full sleep by this i mean it is broken sleep and very light sleep as she listens for her dad to leave for work every morning. It is affecting everybody in the household because when morning comes she is tired and grumpy and doesn't want to get up for school. HELP! Are there any other natural remedies anyone can suggest because my biggest fear if i take her to our GP is that they will prescribe her drugs which is not the path i want to take.

Answer 1

I think this might be more behaviour issue than quality of sleep, but just in case go to the doctor, and get her sleep patterns tested at a sleep clinic. You never have to take drugs even if it is the doc's suggestion, he isnt going to force it into her mouth. Just be really clear about not wanting them. Alot of doc's are ready to try natural therapies if you are.

However i suggest you try the reward method. For every whole night in her own bed with no getting up before say 6am, then reward her with a star. 3 stars gets a video hire of her choice, 5 more gets movies with mum and 10 gets movie with a group of friends.

At the same time be really consistent with discipline. Everytime she gets out of bed, no matter how tired you are, say nothing and walk her back to her own bed. Don;t get trapped in an argument withher, no matter how much she pleads, justbwalk her back to bed. kids can make the most simplest of things seem like a holy terror, but its just bed! Be strong and remember your goal is for her to have a good night sleep, that's not a selfish goal.

Answer 2

WOW I feel like you are telling my lilfe story. I have tried everything you have. I have started giving her multi. vitamins and that has seemed to help alittle.  Wish you luck!

Answer 3

First I would stop her coming into bed with you.She needs to learn to sleep straight through. Second try bendryl.It would be ok for her to take once in a while to help her fall asleep.Also try to make her bedroom only for sleeping.Remove the tv ( if she has one) I find that is a huge problem for my kids.Call her dr and get her in to see them.

Answer 4

If she is waiting up all night to get in bed with you at 4:00 AM, it's obvious that something is really bothering her, and she needs to be comforted.    The first thing you should do is to try to talk to her about this, to get her to tell you what's on her mind.  If she won't reveal the problem, some counseling might be in order.  Perhaps she is being bullied in school, or her teacher is giving her a hard time about something.  You say this has been going on for five months, which is most of this school year, so I'll bet anything it is school-related.

If you or a therapist could get her to open up about the problem, you could probably give her some help in solving it, and she would begin sleeping through the night again.

Answer 5

take her to a psychologist or a psychiatrist.

Answer 6

I have found that melatonin (with a doctors permission) helped my son.  For him, it seems like he gets into a habit from time to time of struggling with sleep, and then he starts expecting not to be able to fall asleep, and a pattern is born.  The melatonin makes it easier to fall asleep.  We have only had to do it for a week or less, and it seems to break the habit... so to speak.

I know this may not be your situation at all, but you may do an informal ADHD assessment.  Kids, even with very mild ADHD, many times have trouble turning off their minds when it comes to sleep.  My son has slept better since his diagnosis and treatment.  Just a thought.

Answer 7

she has an attachment issue with her father. she has to see him before he leaves and when he gets home because she might be afraid he will leave you. Talk to her and ask if she heard him talking about any thing like going on a trip or any thing that has to do with leaving( even if it is for a day or two) if you don't fix this early, she will have abandonment issues and wont want to leave his side at all. if possible see if your husband could leave for work after she has left for school.

Answer 8

IF this has been going on for 5 months, it's a problem that needs a doctor's attention.  It may not be physical.  Is she having problems at school?  Is there a bully or a teacher who she does not like or is afraid of?  You need to find out the root cause of her insomnia.  You can take her to a doctor and still refuse to take a script for any medication.  In time, however, if this condition peresists, you may have to follow what the doctor feels is best.

Answer 9

Sounds like she's sleeping lightly because she doesn't want to miss her dad leaving, and getting in bed with you.  

Try this - agree to wake her up (or set an alarm) when he leaves so she can get in bed with you. Keep your word - get her up to get in bed with you and after a few days, she'll feel secure enough that she won't 'miss' anything and sleep more soundly knowing that she'll be able to climb in your bed for the last few hours of sleep.

Just a thought - that's pretty easy to try out.

Answer 10

Is she BRIGHT!?  My 10yr old drives me crazy with bedtime too. At least ....

Answer 11

She could try some Cammomile tea - spelled it wrong, I'm sure... anyway - she needs a relaxing routine it sounds like - to wind down to go to bed. Does she like to read? Reading always puts me to sleep - lol - but seriously - get her some chapter books, and she can read in bed. My kids fall asleep to the tv - they have one in their room. but they have this routine with a nice warm bath, into jammies, then into their rooms.... quiet, no loud tv, lights off........ zzzzzzz good luck! ♥

Answer 12

She's entering puberty.  If she has a television in her room take the d**n thing out.  Television in a child's room creates sleep disorders and causes sleep deprivation which results in poor grades, behavior problems and causes kids to fall asleep at school.  I suggest you take her to the doctor...he will give you a list of things (mostly natural remedies) for PMS because that's going to be starting soon.