12 Children raising issues: .... ?

Question

it is not about watching them 24/7: it is about developing religous values and support well-manners in their character. so they can watch themselves.

Answer 1

1) for the ages of 3-5 a lot of the electronic media w/ an educational basis I purchased was hardly used.  I would've been better off just w/ the old fashioned books that were sitting there in our home already...ironically enough i've noticed that my 2 older kids until the age of 4 were quite satisfied and amused w/ what was in the house (pots, pans, rocks, sticks) and a lot of what was bought just wasted space

2) an aquaintance who became successful @what he did (he was involved w/ designing the original HALO game) was encouraged by his parents fostering his interests.  He showed an interest early on in electronics and computers and knights.  So his parents hired an electrician when he was around 6 or so and let the electrician teach him basic things.  He then worked on projects from toy/craft stores w/ his new found knowledge.  His parents also bought him the material (chain type stuff) and didn't know how to put it together themselves, but he found a way to create his own armor w/ just the basic materials.  So his parents weren't video game officionados/into the knights of the round table--but he expressed interest in certain things and what they couldn't teach him themselves they found a way for him to learn...

3)i still don't know how to deal w/ the eldest two in terms of physical aggression.  The younger of the two closest in age is 5 and a male, the other kid is 7 and a female.  I never had brothers or sisters myself so i really don't know what's the best route.  I ask them to stop hurting each other and when that fails i ask them "why don't u just kill each other?"  for some odd reason they stop and think after that is said and leave each other alone.  I'm certain there's a better way to handle it but I'm not patient enough.  I just ensure I have two of each toy and try to keep them separated during activities and then there is peace.

4)maybe later I'll elaborate on this one...i wanted to give it multiple answers.

5)many ppl. w/ parents who are affluent have summer jobs. it builds character and makes them grow up.  

6) if my child were badly beaten by a jerk in school I would bring the case to court.  it's simply unacceptable and ridiculous to victimize the child further.

7)i'm an advocate of safe s*x and would encourage abstinence, but I'm also aware of how ppl. can be.  So I'd encourage the use of protection because I seriously doubt a boy will remain a virgin by the time high school is complete.  guys are just very hormonal things and if given the opportunity they're going to take it.  I can't watch him 24-7, nor do i want to.  

8)arrangement of study time depends on what projects are @hand and part of the school year it is.  As long as the homework is complete and test scores are satisfactory they can have as much free time as they want.

9)I make my children play in the yard b.c. if given the option they would play video games/watch cartoons most of the day.  We have a garden that they helped plant and they water it, they also help out w/ my aunts cat sanctuary (she rescues lost and injured cats) during the wk...so they're not constantly locked up in the house.  I also read a lot to them during their early childhood and that fosters a love for reading.  we also read articles on the internet together (their newest interests are topics on the guiness book of world records/i refer them to the "how things work" website when I don't know the answer).

10)i think an hour a day is more than enough.  I allow them to play longer on the wknds., but since it was summer break and they had season passes to amusement/water parks not much time was spent playing video games anyway.

11)i hardly use a mobile so I don't think it's a life or death necessity.  I'll buy an emergency use one and if they have their own money from a job and would like to upgrade their mobile contract I'm ok w/ that.

12) my children were independent w/ it from around the age of 4 years.  

Answer 2

Oh man, I can't just answer this question like that, it needs time to answer them all, ok lets start, hope i will be able to answer them all .enta bas to2mor :)

1- what kind of toys that have educational significance to him/her? and in what ages?

- puzzle, lego, pc games (not all), mechano, ...etc

2- how to support and increase his creativity without leading it? with OUT imposing my own interests on him?

(note: sometimes i m afraid to bring him a kid digital camera and then he become in art and media, or bring him and electricity board and then he become an engineer. i mean i don’t want to pattern his interests, but to support it - HOW?)

- lol, hard one, but i will tell u something, u will gonna see something in him that will attract u , i mean for example , his ability to draw or his way of imitating people, or he like to sing, or he likes to play games, and u will not find anything from this unless u buy him the tools, SO, buy him different things and see what is the most thing he can work with so good.

3- How to deal with siblings hand-fighting?

- 2 ways in fact, and i'm good in the 2nd one,

First one is to talk loud with serious way and try to see the reason for that fighting and solve it as i can,

2nd way is to go with funny way and fight with them and they will laugh , and will understand that its silly to do that, and then try to solve it with funny way

4- What his pocked money should be for? and how to promote saving as a habit? and what kind of saving goals is accepted?

- i will give him (if i have money :D lol) enough money each day for eating normal food, and maybe more to save if he is smart, and i will tell him that i will not be able to buy him whatever he wants, and if he want something he has to save some money to buy it.

5- When to encourage him to go for summer work?

(in some societies they view teenagers who do summer work as kids who belong to poor families)

- yes yes, great ideas, maybe i will try to find for him a work in one of my friend's companies, OR i will leave him search for it, but depends on his age and his personality.

6- How to deal with him after being beaten by one of his peers in school?

(most of ppl in some society blame him for that, i don’t understand why? i mean if he is just physically weaker, that’s not something to blame him for, he did what he could… would ask him to beat that boy when he meet him?)

- I think i will sit with him and talk nice to him , asking him why did he beat u ? and what did u do after that to him? then i will try to find a solution for this with the school managers, but first i will tell my son not to let anyone beat him , except if he start the fighting, and i will try to teach him a self defence sport,

7- How to educate him/her sexually?

(Instead of being "educated" by his peers – I m not talking about the normal question of: ” how did I come?” no I mean in his/her early adolescence and how to make him/her understand the new transformation s/he is going through?)

- I think the mum can teach this for her daughters and the dad for his son, also with a good nice way without being too serious or taking it funny. also maybe a good material will be useful.

8- How to arrange study time for him/her in different ages?

( i mean when s/he is in primary school his study time is limited and can enjoy more free time daily, but when in high school free time is much limited, however some families only permit their kids to enjoy free time in weekends only)

- I dont like to prevent him from his private free time each day except for the weekend, I think its better to give him 2 hours minimum free time per day to do whatever he wants ,

I think it depends on the school time and his other activities , or sports, or even events.

9- How to encourage him/her for constructive habits like reading, sports, writing, painting, or any kind of hobbies like planting, collecting? (Instead of watching Movie channels and cartoon channels and video games)

- Try to buy him or her the tools for this and let him or her explore their imagination, for example buy books, plants pots, seeds, ...etc OR to try to take them to play sports in the club and play with them too, ITS VERY IMPORTANT for the parents to share with the kid his hobby,

10- But if s/he still likes video games, how much time is enough a week?

- one hour per day, lets say 8 hours per week, friday 2 hours ;) and I will play with him multiplayer ,

11- When it is ok to bring him/her a mobile?

- I think at the age of 15 , if he will need it .

12- When it is ok to let him/her start using the internet?

- I think at the age 12 with a security program to prevent bad websites.

I'm not sure, but i think this is the longest answer for me :D lol