12 month Daughter, will not sleep without me!?

Question

My 12 month old daughter will not sleep unless she is breastfed to sleep! iam pregnant again.11 weeks gone &exhausted. trying to wean baby of breastmilk but i cannot handle the sleepless nights as iam soo tired from being pregnant.i didnt plan being pregnant, if i wernt i would of continued breastfeeding.anyway i breastfeed her in our bed in the dark,she falls asleep in the bed.i cnt pick her up to take her to her cot because she cries straight away. she's very sensitive& seems as though shes always in a very light sleep. I sleep half on and half off my bed, i wake up with aching bones and bruises from were ive layed on the edge of the bed. She used to sleep in her cot and was perfect but since about 9 months shes become so clingy. She literally feeds with one eye half open, and if she finishes feeding and i move to get up. she bursts into tears.I have to watch her on her monitor super carefully to make sure she doesnt roll. also after she's fell asleep she wakes up around 4 times sometimes more a night! i dont know what to do! should i just always make her a bottle instead? should i not breastfeed her to get her to sleep? how do i break this routine without me getting to upset,stressed, & exhausted. Thanks for any help!!

Answer 1

Stop breastfeeding for one...this baby will take the nutrients your new baby will need.....just prop her up against you like a pillow in between with a bottle and she will never know the difference she will feel the pillow against her and the bottle and think it is you....babies can sense pregnancy so that is why she has become real clingy...just give it time and soon she will sleep alone.....but stop breastfeeding asap now that you are pregnant again.  

Answer 2

You have to put her on a new routine.  They say most habits in children are broken within a week if you stick to it.  The week will be h**l but then your problem will be solved.  And stop breastfeeding her....you need those calories to support your own body.  Be tough.  Put her in her bed and keep her there.  Doesn't she have a crib?

Answer 3

Honey, you have too much on your plate.  First of all, you have to be able to rest and eat for the sake of your unborn baby and your health as well.  You are going to have some tough times ahead of you, but stick to your guns.  Get her in a pack annd play or a crib and off the cot.  she can get up off the cot i assume.  Next sit up and hold her while you nurse her and try to wean her onto a bottle.  then put her in the crib for bed.  this next part will be hard, but walk away.  shut the door if you need to and let her cry.  go in and check on her and comfort her to let her know you havent just left her, but do not pick her up.  she will figure it out.  most importantly, dont do things the same way with the second baby.  if you are this tired take a semester off from school and get refocused.  with this going on you wont be able to study anyway.



good luck-you will be fine

Answer 4

A few steps ... not easy but you will have to do it anyways

First - Wean her off breastfeeding. To start with you can get a breastpump, express milk and switch her on to a bottle while holding her.

If you have a crib in your room, move her to the crib. She will cry no doubt but let her be there. Most kids don't cry for more than 30-40 mins. Let her be and don't pick her up as soon as she cries. Wait a bit longer each time. Do it a few times and she will know that she cannot get what she wants by crying. - This is the most important part - don't give in.

Keep the crib in your bedroom for a few days so that she feels re-assured but she is not hampering your sleep. Then move the crib to another room. She will be  disturbed a few days. Keep her favourite toys near her and re-assure her. This will take a few weeks but she will settle down. With proper precautions, you will not need to watch her all the time. Its a part of growing up... both for you and your child - for you to let go a little and for her to take charge a little ... small steps but very important in shaping your daughter in a wonderful, independant individual.

Second - Eat. Its important that you get your diet right. Having a good diet will alleviate your mood and will be good for you, your daughter and your unborn child. Make that effort to cook yourself a meal. Exercise lightly when you have the time.

Third - Get your boyfriend to be a bit more supportive when he is around.

I have 2 boys of my own so I know what it is like. Be patient, calm and firm. Everything is gonna be alright. Before you know they will be growing up, going to school and doing stuff and you will wonder how it all happened. Just one secret ingredient - Love ... use lots of it :)