13 year old just told he has autism just wondering if anyone else has had this happen?

Question

My son was diganosed in 6th grade in school with autism and he just got a medical diganoises a few months ago. I was just wondering if anyone else has had this happen and how they deal with it? I knew he had ADHD and ODD now he has all this . his anger is really getting out of control all the meds aren't working school really doesn't deal with it he gets kicked out at least once a week any sugestion would be helpful

Answer 1

Is this anger recent? Is he on an IEP or other individulaized plan? Is there an intervention counselor? Is he gifted?

I say that because some people mis interpret:

http://www.brainy-child.com/article/unde...

Answer 2

Make sure that you are first of all keeping a accurate file of all correspondance from school. Things are done a little different in each state but all must follow federal guidelines. At a minimum he is entitled to accomidation  services through 504. All states have a office for complaints I mention this because his behavior plan ,if he has one is not working. I would guess that he might be able to receive special  education services. All states have a office for this, call them and ask questions. Your job is to advocate, and be the best.   Send me a personal e- mail if I can help more.

Answer 3

Your child should be getting help thru special education at the school. He will then be protected by the federal law IDEA and they can NOT suspend him from school if he's in special ed.

Answer 4

It's not unusual for high functioning kids such as HFA or Asperger's to be diagnosed later. I also have a 13 y/o with AS (no comorbid conditions)and an 8 y/o with autism.

We have not had really experienced these kinds of rages, mostly those due to frustration.  There are people on boards I belong to have had these issues when their child hits puberty.  It could be this, or it could be this additional dx being the straw for your son.  He may be hiding low self esteem with his anger.  Depression is not uncommon for the high funtioning because they realize that they are different. Meds are not always the answer.  Individuals on the spectrum have problems with self- regulation.  Janice explained it really well.

I agree 100% with Junebug, who suggested the FBA. Since he is on an IEP and not 504, you are a full member of the team and the school  must respond to your requests.  You are the expert on your own child.  Don't let the school tell you that you don't know.  The whole IEP process can be very intimidating since it is usually one parent and across the table from all the school reps.

ONe option is to hire a professional advocate to go with these meetings with you.  Also, make sure you are familiar with the document about special ed rights required to be given at each IEP.  Go to wrights law to learn more about SpEd laws and rights.  Educate yourself about autism and his comorbid conditions.  Learn how to do an FBA- make sure that both you and the school are keeping ABC sheets to determine the what the causes of his behaviors are.  Right now I'm learning about the Ziggurat model- It is EXCELLENT.  The behavior plan that results from the FBA should be based on Positive Behavior Support.

Good luck!

Answer 5

Children with autism do not like change and your son's recent change in school may very well be part of the problem.  

I would suggest that you request that the school do a Functional Behavior Assessment.  The school should then chart and track his behavior to see what it is that is setting him off.  Then they can do a Behavior Modification Plan which will address his inappropriate behaviors.  A good behavior modification plan will state the inappropriate behavior, give your son alternatives for showing more appropriate behaviors and give his teachers effective teaching practices/tools when dealing with your son.

Answer 6

My Daughter was diagnosed at 13 with Asperger's, she did get Dyslexia, ADD, NVLD and Bi Polar before Asperger's was finally diagnosed and she has all of this issues. My youngest was diagnosed with Asperger's at age 3 and my brother was diagnosed at age 42.  

Only my youngest has had anger issues, read Tony Attwoods books they are good at explaining to parents and teachers the Rumble - Rage - Recovery stages of Asperger Rages. My boy went on Tofranil to help with the anxiety and then we taught him the internal identifiers that lead up to the rage, put in place a school strategy team that taught the teachers his triggers, and behavior's that identify his Rumble. Taught the teachers their roll in helping defuse the Rumble eg. time out in the library or on the computer to help calm him. Taught the teachers their roll in managing the Rage if they didn't defuse it and what they should of done differently the next time he Rumbles. The Recovery stage is very very important, NO ONE  should be hassling him whilst he is coming down from a Rage, questions about his behavior, angry tones of voice etc can and will send him back into a Rage.

You should get busy becoming an expert on Asperger and what that means for your child, do not expect the education system to understand him, YOU have to educate them. Your son is not in control of his emotions and he needs to be taught how to control the internal feelings so that he doesn't lose control and hurt himself, others or property. It's goinging to get worse before it gets better, don't give up, be strong!!!

If he's on meds for ADHD or ODD they are wrong for him, they need to target the anxiety that is the underlying issue, teach him what his brain is not automatically able to do. He can not be held accountable for a behavioral reaction that he has no control of. A child that can not walk is not responsible for their inability to play touch football, well he is not responsible for his inability to control his emotions and needs the people around him to make the neccessary accommodations for him to be able to function at his best.

Now for some good news, my daughter is a fully qualified pastry chef, highly paid and highly regarded for her skills. My son no longer Rages because he has control of the emotions that he once didn't understand, the school have learnt to accommodate his needs and he is achieving accademically in all areas, if fact he was recently re-assessed as Gifted and no longer fiting the criteria for Asperger's, he's about to turn 10. If you put the hard work in now, then there is no end to what your child can and will accomplish, just never give up.

Janice

Answer 7

have you ever heard of the Labeling theory? What this refers to is the concept that you assign a name to a set of behaviors and the child acts in a way and is perceived to fulfill the role the label describes. Why not put your child in an educational environment where they have no knowledge of his behavior and take him of his meds and see what happens. My guess is that you will see an immediate improvement. His anger could and most likely is a manifestation of his anxiety over his inability to fill his perceived role. Your child seems like the perfect candidate for an independent learning program.

Answer 8

I have seen this happen before. I am concerned that he also has OCD and ADHD labels since these can be a part of his autism.

What is important to understand is that your son does not receive information from the senses in the way that other people do. Often even high functioning autistic kids have very high anxiety levels when they are put into a situation in which they are socially uncomfortable, especially when they are asked to perform. This leads to acting out behavior because autism is a communication disorder and these children need to be taught to communicate their needs appropriately.

You don't mention whether or not your son has an IEP. If he doesn't, you want to get that going immediately. Go to the school counselor with the diagnosis and ask him or her to begin the process for special education services This is important because he requires special instruction and accommodations for his communication issues. He also needs instruction in pragmatic language from a speech language pathologist.

If he does have an IEP, there is a 10 day limit to how many days of suspension he can receive before a manifestation hearing is performed to see if the disability is the cause of the problem behavior. Your son's outbursts ARE a result of his disability due to the social confusion he feels.

He really needs direct instruction on how to behave in specific circumstances. Unlike regular children, kids with autism do not learn how to act by observing social contexts. They have to be taught.

The school is doing your son a disservice by not recognizing his special needs. Punishment will not work under these circumstances! You can start working with him at home by teaching and rewarding the behaviors that you want to see. Scott Bellini's book, "Building Social Relationships: A Systematic Approach to Teaching Social Interaction Skills to Children and Adolescents With Autism Spectrum Disorders and Other Social Difficulties" can help you understand and will give you a systematic way of teaching him yourself. You may want to share the information with the school

You can get the book at Amazon. Another book to consider is Dr. Temple Grandin's "Thinking in Pictures." She is autistic and has written this book on what it is like to be autistic. It gives you some great insights.