14 & 19 year old dating - parents & teenager's opinion?

Question

I have a friend who is 14 and dating a 19 year old. She is mature for her age, and he's an awesome guy. Her parents are alright with it, and even like her stay over at his house. Her parents let him go over every night and let them hang out as much as they want to. Her parents even let them stay in alone. Her parents don't like it when they lie down on a couch however. They seem to think the two kids are sitting and watching tv in an un-supervised basement. What the parents don't know is that they are lieing down, and what not. They have even had s*x plenty of times. The two of them know each other very well, and are very comfortable around each other. His parents obviously aren't as worried about the two dating as hers are. The girls parents are very protective though, and would rather the two not date.

I would just like your opinion on this, Parents, and teenagers alike.

Please don't respond negatively as I know the two are in love.

Answer 1

That is a contradiction...the parents can NOT be concerned and protective AND allow their daughter to spend the night and be alone with ANY boy.  She is a child, and he is a legal adult.  YES he can go to jail for having s*x with her, even if she was willing.  this is because she is a CHILD and doesn't know better.  It is absolutely wrong.  And honestly, it is strange for a 19 year old to even have interest in a 14 year old.  My kids are 15, 13 & 11.  They are children who do not know what is best for them.  sometimes they think they do.  But as a parent it is my duty to teach them right from wrong.  This is a pregnancy waiting to happen.  The parents are being naive and ignorant.  The boy is committing a crime and the girl is too young to know better.  In love?  love is easy to come by.  Doing things RIGHT takes effort.

Answer 2

So you want are opinions on this as long as its a happy one.  Well do not ask for people to tell you an opinion if your gonna dictate what they say!  Then its no longer an opinion and we might as well just say i think its terrific because that is what you said to say.  

As a mother of three children i will say that i would not want my daughter dating a 19 year old ADULT.  I mean thats not just 1 or 2 years.  Perhaps if the girl was 17 then it would not be such a big deal.  But 14 and 19 is quite a bit age difference.  What could they possibly have in common?  College student and a junior high student.  Seriously now whether they think they are in love or not.  Its not right in my mind.  But thats just me.  At 14 you should be starting to like boys and going steady.  19 year olds are adults 14 year olds are not.  

Answer 3

The Parents need to WAKE-UP...they will be answering to Gramma and Grampa this time next year if not!

Answer 4

not gonna last and u can never know if they r in love it may just seem that way. By the looks of it she may be mature but not responsible considering shes having s*x at her age and illegally may i add. To him she may be nothing but a booty call cuz while shes at school u dont know wat hes up 2 and hes gonna want to get with someone else eventually cuz shes gonna want commitment and he wont then shell get pregnant thinking ittl bring em closer together but really setting them far apart. Its a very common thing.

Answer 5

well if the parents dont want then 2 date i think its a great idea and they need to stand there ground and actually do something about it before she becomes pregnant and we have another 14yr old on here talking about being pregnant and immature!

Answer 6

I think it's illegal for them to be having s*x, and if she got pregnant I think he could get arrested... I think though. Tell her you shouldn't be 14 and having s*x, wait until your married. Tell her that he might be sent to jail and show her this message. She should stop having s*x and they should wait until she's older. Heck, if they love each other (to have s*x you must be in love) why not get married? If my sister (14) was having s*x I'd keep the guy away and make her stop dating... but that's just me!

Answer 7

weather they love each other or not dose not matter the law is the law if the 19 year old is having sexual relations with the 14 year old it is unlawful and jail can occur.

there is a would of differences in there maturity at that ages too i would not wont it for my child and like it or not the 14 year old has the power to have the 19 year old go to jail for rape.

if they really love each other then wate till they are both legal to be sexually active if they wont that relationship  

Answer 8

Sweetie, this is rape...in the legal sense.

It doesn't matter how "in love" they are, because this guy shouldn't even be in the same social circles as a 14 year old.

I know she's your friend and you think this cool, but the truth is that this is LEGALLY wrong, and this guy has problems.

Sorry if the truth hurts

Answer 9

thats illegal, so stop!

Answer 10

Ok,1) it's illegal! and 2) the first thing that popped into my head (yeah its negative, but too bad) was EWWWWWW. I'm 14! I would never even consider dating a 19 year old, let alone have s*x with him! SICK

Answer 11

There is no such thing a mature love for a 14 year old.  Something is seriously wrong with a 19 year old MAN who wants to be with a 14 year old girl.  It's disgusting and illegal.

Answer 12

im 14...

and tell your friend to STOP!

He could be charged for statatory rape and be consitered a sexual predator for life..

It doesnt matter how mature she is for her age or if hes an awsome guy . ITS ILLEGAL! And whats up with the parents? Something is seroiusly wrong with them too. No normal parents would let their 14 year old daughter date a 19 year old.

OMG that is just WRONNNGG on soo many levels.

Answer 13

ok i'm srry but that's like me and my brother dating... eww, and besides I don't think they should date that far apart at this stage in their life.

Answer 14

yea you bet its illegal! even if they do love eachother! shed better wait another 3 years then it will sound better

Answer 15

love is love age shouldn't matter

but it does this dude could get charged with rape if her parents file charges

Answer 16

i dont find that a problem.

i knew 2 people dating at like 14 and 15 then dating someone 18 and 21.

the thing i have a problem about is how people flip out if people are dating that are 15 and like 20 but they dont care if it is a 21 and 79.

that bugs me alot.

if people like each other then they should go out.

age is just a number.

but i wont date a guy younger than me (grade or age) idk why though

EDIT:

people used to get married at 13 then the boy was like 30.

i dont see a problem even if the law say its illegal.

i think some laws are there for no reason. but thats me.

Answer 17

That's illegal

Answer 18

Well, opinion doesn't matter in this particular circumstance. Let's be black and white. It is illegal for a 14 and 19 year old to date, therefore wrong.

Answer 19

First of all it's WRETCHED, second of all she is not mature for her age, she is lucky if she's even had her period for a year. A 19 year old boy is interested in only s*x. Do you think he cares that Miley has a sunburn. They are not in love. A 14 YEAR OLD AND A 19 YEAR OLD HAVE 2 DIFFERENT OPINIONS ON WHAT LOVE IS...

Not to mention the 19 year old doesn't even know love... Love is when he knocks that poor girl up, then marries her and makes a life with her for the rest of his wretched pedophile life.

Love is taking care of that child so she go to college and better her self so when he does get over his "love" for her she can succeed and not live a shattered life because she got pregnant at 14 and dropped out of school..

this relationship is disgusting and you shouldn't trust a guy that is effing a 14 year old... YUCK.

He's not right in the head.

Answer 20

Eww hese a pedophile, tell her parents 2 take action or tell the po po. thats icky. Love isnt always pure, and doesnt always last forever

Answer 21

Doesn't matter how "mature" she is and how "great" the guy is.  What does a 19 year old have in common with someone that much younger then him?  The child's parents are stupid for not thinking they are just down there sitting and not doing anything else and need to nip this so called relationship in the bud.  It's not even legal in most states.  This is me responding negatively despite your wish for me not too. (By the way asking people to only post the way you want, is a good way to get the opposite)

And by the way, it's not two kids.  It's one kid and an adult.

Answer 22

isn't it illegal to have s*x with someone under 18 if your older then 18? or was that germany?

Answer 23

@ 1st you said they were OK, & then you said they're not. But it's against the law. No matter HOW "mature" she is!  

Answer 24

i would not let my 14 year daughter date a man that was 19. i would however let her "date" a boy her own age but there would be NO unsupervised visits. It would be parents driving them to public places preferably in a group type thing or at home in the family room with family around. so i guess this girl should be glad that her parents are so lenient. I'm not being negative but i do remember what it was like to be young thinking you are mature and dating an older boy,  I was lucky a lot of girls like this end up pregnant and alone. And if I was his parents I would be concerned because if this girl does get pregnant and her parents press charges he'll be in a lot of trouble.

Answer 25

Age is just a number if they love each other and get along why not. I was 16 and married a 26 year old, and I loved it.  My hubby passed away at age 29 less than a month to his 30th birthday, we share a beautiful 3 1/2 year old daughter and I wouldn't change my life for nothing. I am 21, a homeowner (fully paid off), and I stay home with my daughter and I have no help from anyone, I am very financially stable for my age. If i wouldn't of met my hubby at that age I don't know where I would be.

RIP Carlos * forever in our hearts!

Answer 26

i thought u just said her parents are ok with it?

im confused

Answer 27

If she was mature for her age she wouldn't have a boyfriend much less have one who is that much older and or be having s*x with him,which is illegal,so how mature is she really?Breaking the law isn't a good, much less a mature thing.If her parents knew their (A-Words) from a hole in the wall they could obviously see how ignorant they are acting(and letting their daughter act).But believe me all of you need a reality check,being protective is not letting your kids do whatever,like letting her spend the night with her boyfriend and for some odd reason expect them to not do anything.So let me guess whats next from the model parents?Handing her a six pack,a package of cigarettes and some car keys.But please keep us posted,I want to know what happens when they find out she pregnant and I also would absolutely LOVE to know his jail sentence.Good luck with the soon the soon to be parents,remember stay in school kids,or in fourteen year old girls if you're nineteen.  

Answer 28

At this point in time, the ONLY thing that matters is the numbers.  If he gets caught or arrested, he will have to register as a s*x offender for the REST OF HIS LIFE!!  That means his name on maps on the Internet, loss of job opportunities, etc.  His life will be over.  He needs to date someone his own age and she needs to concentrate on school.

Answer 29

Not in my house.  He is over 18 and on my side of the fence now.  You had better believe that if a 19 year old boy came knockin for my 14 year old daughter, he had better have 911 cued up on his phone!