14 and need advice about my stepmom?

Question

I'm 14 and a girl, my dad just came back into my life, he was an alcoholic, my step mom is not mean or unfair or anything like that I'm just really nervous about this whole thing, i don't know how to act towards her, also i don't want to be in the wedding i will go but id probably lay low, also if i do have a connection with her does that mean i have to call her mom or something because i already have one of those i just need some advice on how to act, and how to tell them i don't want to be in the wedding

Answer 1

Just be honest. Take you step-mom aside and tell her that you are really looking forward to getting to know her, and you are flattered that they asked, but that you just aren't ready to be that "close" yet and you would rather not be in the wedding.

What you call her should be up to you and her. If you do become close you don't have to call her anything. I'm sure that you have aunts or older family friends that you are close to. A title doesn't signify a bond, just like a bond can exist without a title.

Talk to her and I'm sure things will work out. :)

Answer 2

Relax and be yourself when you are around her . The more that you are around her and talk to her the easier it will be .

You don't have to call your step mom  mom . If any thing is mentioned about you calling her mom just let your dad & her know that you are not comfortable with calling her mom because you already have a mother . Calling her by her first name is just fine .

Believe it or not she is probably just as nervous as you are about this .

As far as the wedding goes just tell them , be honest with them and let them know that you do not want to be in the wedding and thank them for the offer .

Always be honest with your feelings . They will respect you for that .

Good luck .

Answer 3

Tell them that you don't want to be in the wedding because you don't want to be in the spotlight or anything, but that you are looking forward to attending.  They will feel rejected if you aren't careful in your wording, so make it seem like you just aren't comfortable being the center of attention.  Don't call her Mom, like you said you've already got one, and just let the rest fall in place.  

Best Wishes

Answer 4

WELL I HOPE UR DAD DONT EXPCT U TO BE ALL OK WIT HIM MARRYYING HER U KNOW CUZ HE JUST CAME BAK IN YOUR LIFE AND HE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND THAT ITS UR DECISON NOT TO BE IN TH WEDDING U KNOW AND WELL BOUT UR STEPMOM UR RIGHT GIRL NOODY COMPARES TO UR MA CUZ SHE THE ONE WHO HAD YOU SO I WUD TELL U TO TELL HER HAY U KNOW I HAVE TO GET USED TO THE IDEA THAT UR HER STEP MOM AND TELL HER TO GIVE U SU M TIME TO LEARN OR BE OK U KNOW CUZ  THE LADY IS GANNA LIVE THERE WIT U AND U DONT WANNA FEELL UNCOMBTABLE IN  YOUR OWN HOUSE SO JUST TALK TO HER AND UR DAD HE SUD UNDERSTAND THAT UR OK WIT THEM GETTIN MARRIED IS JUST THAT U DONT WANNA BE A PART OF IT U DO THEN U DONT TRUST ME I BEEN THREW THIS JUST TALK WIT HER I KNOW SHEL UNDERSTAND CUZ ME I HAD TO TALK TO A GUY MY MA WAS MARYYING U KNOW SO YEA ITS EASIER TO TALK GIRL O GIRL IF DAT DONT WORK IDK IF U EVER SEEN THE PARENT TRAP WELL JUST DO **** TO MAKE HER LEAVE NA JK JUST TALK TO HER AND UR DAD AND THE WAY U ACT TOWARDS HER DONT WORRY IT WILL JUST HAPPEN AFTER U TALK TO HER