16YR OLD SON LIVES W/GRANDPARENTS WANTS TO MOVE WITH HIS MOM?

Question

i have a 16 yr old son who was adopted by my parents when he was 4. My parents and i agreed that i would always be there mother and they would never keep him from me. He doesnt have a bad life with my parents but they are older and he has requested over the yrs to come move with my husband and i we have 3 children. I would love this but his grandparents fight it all the time. He is a great kid. his grandparents are keeping him from me now beacuse they know he wants me and he is threatning to runaway. I discourage it but it is really starting to affect him. my son and i have always had a wonderfull relationship. I HAVE BEEN IN HIS LIFE EVERYDAY OF HIS LIFE AND HAVE SUPPORTED HIM FINANCALLY BECAUSE MY PARENTS ARE RETIRED BUT WHAT CAN I DO TO GET MY SON BACK. I KNOW THIS ISNT GOING TO END WELL FOR ANYONE BUT I DONT WANT MY SON TO HURT ANYMORE OR FEEL LIKE HE DOESNT BELONG. i LOVE MY PARENTS BUT I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY WONT LET HIM COME LIVE WITH ME I WOULD NEVER KEEP HIM FROM THEM. WHAT CAN I DO

Answer 1

Why did you give him to your parents anyways? Being that he's been under their care, I can understand why they're a little hesitant. And well, quite honestly, for grandparents to have custody, something must have happened.

See, most people would go to court over it and just get their child back. But something tells me there's more going on here than what we are just seeing here....

Answer 2

WELL SAID LEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 3

If they are keeping him from you and you had an agreement to see him, try to talk to them, if this still doesn't work then I am afraid you may need to talk to a lawyer. I am sure this is not what you want to do. But since you have always been in his life and you have supported him financially I would say you have a good chance of getting your son legally. But try to talk to them first.

Good luck.  

Answer 4

If they have legally adopted him, then you will need to get legal advise from a lawyer. It sounds as if there is more going on to this story if they are so adamant about not letting him go.

Good Luck!

Answer 5

You need to go to court and sue for custody. You also need to impress upon him - your duty as a parent - that no matter how he feels about these people, they took him in when they had absolutely no obligation to do so and maybe if they're getting older, they need him.

You also need to realize that in two years if your son wants to live with you, he can. They did the hard part and because they are his parental figures, he's rebelling against them instead of you. You, by what you say, have only been a parent to this child in a financial sense. Awesome for you that your life is together but when you needed someone to take in your child - they were there for you.

I would encourage you to read your post several times until you can look at it like it's someone else's words and see what you're asking and I know you love you son but they do too - you haven't been his parent - they have. In a normal circumstance, he would get beyond the teen angst and realize they had some wisdom but, of course, not having been his parent (and do you have any teens?) you're looking to break the bond that they have and you might not think it's there but it is.

Consider this as well - one of the children you've raised is rebelling and they want to go live with grandma and grandpa who won't be so strict with them - what would you say?

Good luck.

Answer 6

you can take them to court but they are not hurting him maybe see if you can get him to stay with you durring the summer months so as not to hurt your parents cause im sure they love him very much and legally he is their son