18, married, and want a baby but??

Question

If you are 18 years old and married do you think it is wrong to have a baby? people say babies hold you down, but I don't think they really would. If you want to go out dancing every once in a while you just get a babysitter and if you want to go other place just take your baby with you. so my question is, Do you think it is wrong to have a baby at 18? and Do you think a baby holds you down?

Answer 1

I got pregnant at 18 and it all sounds easy.. just get a sitter.. but who is going to be your sitter.. you can't just assume your parents will do it and your friends are probably who you are wanting to go out with.. and when your Friends all want to go out and you can't find a sitter then you get upset then you end up losing some friends because you have less in common with them. .. if you can .. wait about 2 years.

Answer 2

No! Do not have a baby.\

You are to young to be married...and too young to have a baby!

YOur marriage might not even last. It probably won't! Then you will be stuck.

Get your education and give it at least 10 years!

YOu are still a child yourself! It would not be fair for the baby. one of the true signs of maturity is not thinking about yourself only!

Answer 3

Look there are negatives and positives to having a child at 18, and really I believe that it depends on the person mainly.  I had my daughter at 18, 10 days after graduating high school.  Would I ever say that I should have never done it? NO, I love my daughter so d**n much...but it has been SO HARD.  And I have a lot of support from family member (not really finacial though).  Working full time and going to college full time often leaves me feeling guilty for not being there as much.

And you never know what kind of child  you will have.  You may have the baby that everyone loves to keep and you can take anywhere, or you can have a colicky child that screams non stop that no one can stand to watch.

You need some other goals in your life, at least get an Associates Degree in something before having a child, because you may not be married forever and you need some sort of alternate plan.

My pregnancy was the best accident in my life (I was on birth control pills, but they failed and I was not using a back up method) however if you have a CHOICE not to even get pregnant at the moment dont.  Enjoy your marriage, set your self some goals and achieve them.

Answer 4

18 is way to young to have a baby

Answer 5

I think you should value your freedom for a few more years.  Being married at 18 is even too young..you still have a lot of growing up to do believe it or not.  In the next few years, you will change a lot.  Don't bring a  baby into a situation that can fail.  I'm not trying to be mean but the divorce rate for those who marry under the age of 25 is the highest.

Answer 6

you are way too young to have a baby, especially if you are still in college or going into collge. my mom had me at 27 and she says it was the best thing that happend to her but she says she felt she should of waited. just think about it, when your child is ten you wouldn't even be thirty. also, you have to be really financially fit to have a baby. and is your husband really supportive when it comes to financial situations, maybe you should wait at least ten years before having a baby, just to make sure you can afford it and that your husband will really support you. you must be mature though, getting married at 18 is young. very young, you should watch that show engaged and underaged, they go through a lot, after they are married.

Answer 7

Long story short, you're an idiot. I guarantee you that you will get a divorce.. and you don't want to drag a child through that.  

Answer 8

did you even watch the show baby borrowers?? all the teen couple on there came on wanting a baby now they defintely do not and they are broken up cause of the hard experinece they went through. There's more to just getting a babysitter and you can not just take your child anywhere, they cry and they cry loud!!! I am 36 yrs old with a 2  yr old and a 10 yr old daughter..I had my first at 25 years old and i still was not ready so i would think long and hard about this..having a baby is not a cake walk and your previous questions seem to be still that you are a teenager and NOT ready for a baby...you asked is Demi Lovato pretty with bangs? you asked about the Jonas Brothers in another question? Wait til you are over celebrities in that teen way and work on your marriage First cause putting a baby in the mix will mean the baby always comes before the husband. you need to have fun being a newlywed for a couple of years!!

Answer 9

There is a lot of maturity yet to be gained at 18 before having kids, regardless if they "hold you down". Do you want to be a parent now? It's good to be married for a while before having a baby and focus on your marriage.  A baby will not hold you down in any way if you are mature and ready to be a parent and put your entire life and energy into that child. It's not an ornament or cute doll that you get to carry around and have smile at you. You need to be willing to have that baby be your entire responsibility, night and day.

Answer 10

If thats what you want, go for it. there are so many people out there who say DONT YOUR TOO YOUNG, ENJOY YOUR YOUNG LIFE....when really they dont know you and how you are. If you are married and financially stable and ready for a child, then go for it. An 18 year old is very capable of being mature enough to have a baby. Why do you think that was a normal age to have babies 100 years ago? Its just society today makes it seem wrong because most 18 year olds want to party and most dont have the financial stability. If you're ready then go for it. I say this because my cousin just turned 30 and had her first child and still smokes, goes out drinking every weekend, and has her mom basically raise this child. She also doesnt have a lot of money and lives in a tiny 2 bedroom apartment.  I also have a cousin who is 21 and just had a baby, her and her fiance just graduated college, both have good jobs, bought their first house, they are very mature and great parents. It all depends on the person.

Answer 11

I think you need to slow down. :)

Theres lots more to babies and being a mom than just "getting a babysitter" or "just take the baby with you"....lets remember children grow and become your 24/7 as soon as you conceive so theres not much room for freedom and not to mention what happened to being a teen??? children are a blessing but also lots of work. You need to be ready.

Go have fun...enjoy your marriage. Theres lots of time and when you rush things don't always work out. Take your time. You have no idea the changes that occur when you become a mother....its not "just" that easy. But hey good luck and what ever happens I wish you the best.

Answer 12

Are you really ready? Are you financially fit to have a baby? Are you okay with not being able to go out with friends and partying? Your life will dramatically change. Its not about you and your husband anymore, its all about the baby.

Answer 13

Although it's hard to imagine it now, having a baby at 18 would be but a child raising a child. Maturity and developmental changes are drastic between 18 and 22, then again between 22 and 26, a closer to ideal time to become a parent. Most people think about what it would mean to them to have a baby, rather than think, Do I have the proper, stable, loving, committed situation and home in which to raise a child? At 18, the answer is no.

Did you see the film Juno? It's a great portrayal of courage, unconditional love, and budding maturity.

Answer 14

Children will forever change your life as you know it now. If you do not believe that then you are not ready for a child. Why the rush? You have alot of living to do......why bring a child into it if you are not done "dancing".

Answer 15

I dont think its WRONG, but I do think its not the best of ideas, even if you are married. That is still pretty young.

YES a baby does hold you down. One thing that girls dont understand is when you have a baby, leaving their baby with a babysitter is not as easy as they think it is. I know its not just me, but I didnt trust ANYONE to watch my baby besides maybe my mom, but we lived 1200 miles from her. And now that we live closer, I do not want to impose on my mom to watch her. Its just a feeling that you can't fathom until you actually have a child of your own.

All I am hearing are ways to get out of the house when you have a kid. But what are the ways you will stay IN your house when you have a kid? Babies take a LOT of money. Does your husband make enough to let you stay home with the baby and buy formula and diapers and clothes on top of rent, utilities, car, insurance, etc.? And if not do you have a job where you make enough to pay for daycare, PLUS enough to help with the bills?

And on top of that, if you are 18 and married, that means you JUST got married. Marriage is hard, much less with a kid thrown into the mix. I am still a firm believer that if you can help it, you need to give you and your husband time to just be a married couple. No matter how much you think you know someone before you get married (or move in together), you don't know them as much as you think you do. I have been married 5 years and I still dont know everything about my husband. Give things some time to work and to get used to before having a baby.  

Answer 16

Being married at 18 is hard enough.  I would wait a few years before trying to have a baby.  You are just starting out in life and need to enjoy this time with your husband before you have extra responsibilities.  Having children is wonderful, don't get me wrong, but you need to have "couple time" first.  Too many people don't realize how important that time is and think that having a baby will make everything better for whatever reason.  Having a child is hard and takes a lot out of you.  You may love that child with everything in you but you will wish you had some time to explore and discover who you really are.