3 year old acts aggressive when mother picks up from daycare?

Question

I have a daycare and I have a 3 year old who is very well behaved durring the day he is one of my best kids. However when his mother comes to pick him up he starts acting out and hitting the other kids being disrespectful to me and my things he will throw things and kick things. He also was hitting his mother very hard one night. He has just recently gotten to this more aggressive behavior. He just turned 3 and I have had him almost a year next month. He has always pushed his limits when his mother would come to pick him up but this more aggressive behaivior has got me wondering what on earth has gotten into this wonderful little boy. The other day he even acted out durring the day when it was just me and this is the first time he has acted this way without his mother here.

Answer 1

Same thing here. He is just showing that his mother does not discipline him and when she arrives he acts the same as when he's home because he no longer has any repercussions when mom is around. It won't end until She takes action.

Answer 2

LOL before you decide to start calling in the troops, consider his developmental stage right now.  He is at the age where they are *all* about testing boundries.  Some kids are pretty easy going, and its not a big deal, and others really like to push limits.  When we are talking about a caregiver who has a child all day long, and a mother who has him the balance of the time, it puts the child in a position of having to decide exactly where the boundries are.  All kids have to dela with this, weather it is school daycare, feild trips, whatever.  Its normal.  It could be that he is just trying to figure out if he can get away with something different in front of you with mom standing there, or vice versa.  It could also be mom does not tolerate that at home but is uncomfortable disciplining her child in front of you.  There could be an eviromental change at his home that has him upset.  I wouldn't jump to conclusions just yet, but it is something to be wary of.  Were the behavior to continue to get worse, or if you notice withdrawal, or even marks that can't be explained, then I would consider maybe taking some action.  In the meantime, find a way to tactfully tell mom that she should not be allowing her kiddo to treat her like that.  Some people can handle it directly.  Others will be very offended, so its best to tread lightly.  You could also try asking her how things are going with her, see if you can maybe get some mroe info that way.  With her son acting out with you all of a sudden, if that continues for longer than a few days i would definately mention it to the mom, in the guise of working with her to correct the unwanted behavior.  

My two have pulled similar stunts over the last two years.  At first it was just embarrassing and I wuld never correct them, I would let it go until we got home.  But i quickly figured out that this is a great way to send mixed messages.  Now they know it does not matter where we are or who is standing there, I do NOT tolerate certain behaviors, and hitting tops the list.  I hope its nothing more than normal growing pains!

Good Luck

Answer 3

IT sounds like he gets upset when his Mom comes to get him. Do you think his home life is bad?

Answer 4

Hmmm, seems like something is going on in the household. Perhaps he's not wanting to go home. Maybe you should make a phone call to Children, Youth, & Family in your local yellow pages. Something may be wrong.