39 weeks husband caught watching..?

Question

Ok so im 39 weeks preggo tommo im due for a c sec this week me and hubbies sexual activiety hasent been great the whole pregnancy i have had no self esteem atall etc twice during pregnancy i have caught him watching p**n i know its the twice as i have a logger on my pc the most recent being last night i went mad really mad i just flipped as the last time he promised he wouldnt again for me its just the same as cheating on me whats your opinions and how should i treat the situation

Answer 1

nothing wrong with internet p**n would you rather have in a stip club or on the net?

Answer 2

Well that must be devastating. When you told him not to do it and he wouldn't but did it anyways. But he is a man and not having s*x for that long is probably making him go crazy, I don't think it is any where near as severe and cheating.  

Answer 3

Why is watching p**n the same as cheating? He is probably just "blowing off steam" as he is worried about you being pregnant and not wanting to do anything to harm the baby, from your question you said you have had low self esteem during your pregnancy so from an outside point of view it would seem you have been withholding sexual activity and the poor guy is just looking for a way to help himself out WITHOUT cheating.

Answer 4

Girl I agree in a sense! Watching p**n is like cheating. Especially as your hormones are raging and you want the attention on you. On the other hand, your man is a man, and if you won't help get his "rocks off", then he as gotta do what he has gotta do. Since you have confronted the matter, let see if he keeps his promise. For not your need to worrying about that beautiful baby you are about to bring in this world and make sure you have everything in order to bring that baby home. In addition, focus on your sleep and rest, cause, hunni, believe me, you will need it once that baby comes! Good luck!

Answer 5

i wouldn't be happy either its insulting he should want to look at you naked not some random chic... i would be devastated you are totally right it is sorta like cheating i mean he wouldn't want you looking at naked guys would he...  

Answer 6

I would be mad too! We are not exactly feeling comfortable about our weight at the moment and we need all the support and love from our partners at the moment. Men just don't understand what's happening to our bodies, out emotions and our self esteem. It was wrong what he did and this is not a habit that you want him to continue.. But for now, you have enough on your plate. Try to keep the peace and stay calm... You don't want to add extra stress or cause more anxiety.. Try to get out of the house and go for a facial or body massage. You need to pamper yourself at this stage of pregnancy.. All the best for a quick recovery on your C section...

Answer 7

I feel as it is cheating too.  Not physically but it is a form of emotional cheating.  I went through this with my first pregnancy.  I was on bedrest at 22 weeks so we didn't have a s*x life either.  Well, at about 33 weeks I happen to be looking through the browser history for a site that I had gone to the night before and I seen a site that looked suspecious so I clicked on it.  Well, I really didn't want to see that.  i confronted him about it and he said that it was normal and all of that.  I went crazy.  I started crying and everything.  I told him that it is not the fact that he was doing that, it was the fact that he normally doesnt do it and now when I am feeling at my worst, he will do this to me.  Granted, he has never been on any of those sites again and even threw magazines that he had from when he was single.  Now that I am expecting twins, we had the discussion already and he assured me that he will not do that and the only reason he did it in the first place was because he didn't think I had an issue with it.  Well, yeah.  Does any woman (pregnant or not) want her husband to awe over other women in magazines or on the net with the perfect bodies?

Answer 8

it is not the same at cheating.. it's not that big of a deal.  He's probably a little frustrated beacuse he hasn't been getting it regularly so he watched something to make doing it himself a little more fun.  Letting him have some fun with p**n could keep him from actually cheating on you.   I think you need to relax and just let him watch it. It isn't his fault that you are having self esteem issues... consider his needs as well.  Obviously he understands that you don't want to have s*x.. so he is respecting that and not pushing & trying to take care of his needs himself.  I am sorry, but I think you are over reacting.  

Answer 9

Im not trying to be mean, but sometimes I feel so sorry for the men who cant get any lovin whilst their wives are pregnant Im not sure exactly what they are expected to do when their s*x drive is still normal & the wives/gf's are holding out I know you arent feeling your sexiest but it isnt fair to him for you to make such demands Not only can he not get it from you, but when he goes to stroke his own meat he getls flack for that too? arghhhh! lol, poor guy

Yes you are overreacting, and you should give your husband a pat on the back for keeping his urges in check

Answer 10

I don't think it's the same as cheating.  I think it's more like a way to avoid the temptation to cheat.  I wouldn't worry about it, unless it was something totally weird that you two could never do.

Answer 11

I think you need to come to terms with why you have a problem with him watching it? Do you feel betrayed? Would you rather he go out and meet girls?

I haven't been in the mood most this pregnancy, and my hubby has had to pleasure himself once-and I felt horrible-but I'm just never in the mood. When we do it, it is mostly for him right now, but I wouldn't be upset if he had to look at porno to get it done. A man shouldn't have to be tortured just because our hormones are whacking out our s*x drive, and you shouldn't take it so personally.  

Answer 12

The answer to your question will go 2 ways.  Those who don't care and those who do.  I am one of the ones who don't care about p**n - don't get me wrong... I don't tell my husband that.  I make him be fast and secretive about it!  I would hate it if he were to just randomly started going on it ALL of the time, but he can't if he thinks I don't know.  

In my mind, he could be doing way worse things, that involve people for instance.  I am 19 weeks pregnant this week and have had a UTI I can't seem to shake for the last couple of weeks and intimacy is really last on my list too.  I know he has things that he wants to do and if glimpsing at a little (like I said, not a LOT) of p**n helps him do what he has to, then OK... I mean, I have pain and hormones to make me not want to...

Sorry if that wasn't the answer you were looking for, and it may not be the right answer for you, but it works for me.  I know my husband loves me and wouldn't cheat on me and this seems like a kind of sexual "compromise" for us right now.  Good luck with your situation and your new little miracle!

Answer 13

Watching p**n is nothing, just be happy you didn’t catch him actually cheating on you.  I haven’t felt like having any s*x during my pregnancy until recently (I’m 8 months) but before I would push him to watch p**n that way he would leave me alone, lol.  I much rather him watch p**n then go out there and cheat on me.