4 y.o. boy, language delay, but talks. Will use potty if taken, but will not say he needs to potty.?

Question

I'm at my wits end with this potty training thing. My son WILL NOT tell anyone that he has to use the potty. We thought it had something to do with his speech development delay. NOT! That boy can quote whole Backyardians dialogue with no problem.

When asked if he needs to go potty, his usual response is, "Not yet."

HELP!!!!! What do I do if I believe he is choosing not to say anything?

Answer 1

You need to have some kind of reward for him going.  However, you still won't be able to have him tell you for a while.  Every couple of hours, or when you feel he should try to go, tell him it's time to go potty and the reward he'll get when he does.  It can be anything from a special treat to playtime with a toy he only gets after he goes potty.

His ability to remember dialogue has nothing to do with recognizing when he has to go to the bathroom.  Sometimes they just don't fully "get it".  My son has a delay as well.  He has dealt with an expressive/receptive communication delay, as well as some sensory issues.  I trained him at age 3, and put him directly in underwear, not pullups.  He hated the feeling of pee running down his legs, so he learned a bit faster.  My older son couldn't have cared less, so we did a star-sticker potty chart.  Actually, we did sticker charts for all our kids.

My friend has a son who's autistic, and she had the same problem, except her son wouldn't go p**p on the toilet.  She got a handheld video game that he could only play when he sat on the toilet.  

So, my advice:  Find out what will motivate him to go when you tell him to, and don't look for him to be able to start telling you when he has to go until he gets in the habit of going.  When he keeps going on a regular basis, he'll start putting two and two together.  It may take months, so hang in there!

Answer 2

stick him on the potty untill something comes out...

Answer 3

A language delay might be a sign of autism but it is more likely that you son just isn't ready yet.   The development and maturity of a boy usually lags behind girls and a four year old boy can still be in a toddler.

This method to potty train a boy is becoming clliche but it is tried and true.    Try making a game of by putting Cheerios in the toilet and have him aim at them while he tinkles.  

Now that the weather is getting warmer, dress your son in just a t-shirt and let him go bare bottom without a diaper. Keep an eye on him,and when you get the sense that he wants to potty, toss a few Cheerios into the potty and have fun.

My sister and I did that with my nephew and it helped with his daytime wetting (and it was so cute to watch him too). My nephew was nearly 4 yrs old before he was out of daytime diapers so it might be the case that your son isn't quite ready yet. Don't rush things his growth and development might not be inline with your due date. Patience is the key.

Answer 4

when he has a accident make him stay in his soiled pants for a while. walk him to the potty . make him sit  and then make him put back on his soiled pants. do this 5 times everytime he has an accident...It will only take a few times.

Answer 5

Have you associated a reward with going Potty?  If your little one feels he will be rewarded for the action he may more likely partake in it.  You could also try before you go the bathroom, saying "I have to go the "potty"/"bathroom" (whatever word you associate with it) then take him with you to the restroom.  That way he will associated what he should say with the action of going the potty.  And maybe he still needs you to make the decision for him on when he needs to go potty.  So at certain times throughout the day, say it is time to go potty and take him by the hand, even if he says I don't have to go.  My mom always said try before we go, and no matter how much I thought I didn't have to go I always had a little tinkle in there!!