4 year old hit 5 week old?

Question

We usually keep our other children ages 2 and 4 away from our 5,now 6-7 week old but one day our 4 year old caught us off guard.When we were getting ready to leave the house my 5 week old was strapped into her cars seat and Dad was putting shoes on our 2 year old,I was putting my shoes on and our 4 year old hit our then 5 week old in the face multiple times.He has developmental problems possibly Aspergers Syndrome,and this has been known and documented with his doctors and other specialists since he was 2 and a half.The next morning bruises appeared on both sides of her face so I wanted to make sure she was ok so I took her to the ER.They called DCFS and took pictures and everything.The hospital did a ct scan on her head,and a skeletal survey,which I don't understand because we told them he only hit her in the face.Nothing was found on the ct scan or the skeletal survey and we were allowed to take her home the next day.Today she is getting a follow up skeletal survey-two weeks after-why?I'm afraid I will lose my children because of what our 4 year old did.By the way I live in Illinois.

Answer 1

not sure what you are asking but.....

get the documentation from your 4 yr old's dr and be sure you understand the syndrome and have all the answers for DCFS.  Explain what happened your son's  pediatrician and ask if that is due to the syndrome and also what steps you can take to be sure it never happens again.  Document all of this so you can show DCFS that not only is it possible your son did it, you are taking steps to resolve it and ensure your baby's safety.

NEVER leave her alone again or always be sure your son is next to you or his dad.  There was recently a case in my city where a 10 month old baby was at a daycare and a 7 year old child at the same facility picked her up out of a baby seat and threw her to the ground twice and actually killed her.    Your situation is just as dangerous.  

Answer 2

The reason for the report to DCFS is either the ER didn't believe you (that your 4 yo did it and he has issues) or that you were negligent in watching the infant allowing the 4 yo to hurt the infant.  The scan is precautionary and a follow up may show something that initially an injury may not show.  Because she was in her car seat it is very unlikely that she has a brain injury.  I do not think that you are in danger of losing your children.  Most likely DCFS will open a file on you and maybe come out to inspect your house.  You may have to go to family for the judge to decide what level you are on.  Most "freak accident" types are given probation.

If your asperger son is this impulsive and aggressive regularly it may be time to consider medication.  If it was an unusual occurrence then I wouldn't consider it.  I have 2 sons that are on the autistic spectrum.  It is hard to predict and keep ahead of what they will get into next

Answer 3

So how did you discipline the 4 year old? I understand he has a disorder but he still needs some kind of discipline to make him understand that it is very wrong to hit the baby

Answer 4

Whack Him, and whack him hard! I don't give a sh*t what the law says. Some times a good back hand is needed to instantly instill discipline.

Answer 5

Hang in there-You didn't do anything wrong. That child needs to learn that its not ok to hit his smaller sibling. I'm sure the reason they are doing the skeletal survey is to check for child abuse. I really don't think that your 4 yr old is strong enough to do an y skeletal damage like that-not with his bare hands anyway. You should be ok unless they find any other reason to believe the child is being abuses. They will also check your other children too and if there aren't signs on them they have nothing!

Answer 6

You need to make sure that your older son knows that it is wrong to hit anyone, especially a little baby.  Did you immediately punish your son in some way.  Even children with developmental problems such as Aspergers are able to understand the difference between good and bad behaviors.  I would recommend placing your child in a time out immediately after showing any type of aggressive behavior and then calmly explaining to your child that the behavior is not allowed.  Never punish your child by hitting him, which would reinforce the violent behavior in  his mind.  

In the meantime NEVER leave your infant alone with her brother.  A hit the the head in a child so young can lead to permanent brain damage, and another instance like this could result in you loosing custody of your baby.  

Answer 7

They took all the tests to be on the safe side. How do they know that the baby's head wasn't hit or damaged.  Of course they are going to call DCFS.  They take all precautions, no matter what the story!  Have you been interviewed by anyone?  You have documentation and a diagnois that your son has this syndrome.  I wouldn't be too worried.