5yr old jealous over new silbings?

Question

I have a five year old daughter, Millie.

& 8wk old twins, Blake &Kira.

Since the day Blake & Kira were born, Millie has been very jealous.

She gets just as much, maybe even more attention than her brother and sister; but its just not constant attention on her.

She doesnt miss - behave or attention seek because of this.

She does the opposite, she just has seemed very upset these past two months.

I have asked her about it and she said its because she loves Lake and Kir, but she wants mummy and daddy back.

She gets plenty of attention, i was scared this would happen so im probably spoiling her at the moment.

What can i do?

Thankyou!

Answer 1

the problem is that she is the sibling of twins. When you go out I bet everyone comes over and gushes over the babies and ignores her. Make a point of pointing out the best big sister there has ever been. Make people notice her, it is very hard for the siblings of twins as no matter how much time you are giving her others are noticeing the twins over her.

Also she needs time to adjust to the fact that it will never be just her. That is one of the hardest things with having a large age gap is they clearly remember it just been them. She will adjust with time. Just treat her the same as you did before. If she thinks acting sad will get her more attention then there is no reason for her to adjust. Involve her in the babies life. She can help with getting the nappy, if you bottle feed she can help feed. Make her realise that being a big sister is a great thing and how she will get to teach them all sorts of things

Answer 2

wen i was five i was jealous of my new born sister but i got over it. she will get used to it. just make time and make sure she knows its her time with her parents without the two babies.

Answer 3

Maybe she just wants more alone time with you guys.  Emphasize it's a special time.

Answer 4

Ge her to help you with your 2 other children,being that they are only newborns or baby's get her to help you bathe them, pass you a nappy when you change their bums, get their clothes ready when you change their clothes. There are lots of thing's she can help you with, that way she won't feel left out and she is still doing stuff with you together. Try it, it may work, it might not, but it's worth a try.

Answer 5

i would set some special time with her, just let it be her and you/her dad, but talk to her about the fact that you love her and you and your husband had so much love they wanted to share that with another child and ended up with two more, but tell her that she's special because she has two younger sibling who will look up to her and she wants to set a good example.

http://kidshealth.org/parent/question/in...

http://kidshealth.org/parent/pregnancy/b...

http://kidshealth.org/kid/feeling/home_f...

http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/fa...

p.s. as she gets older dont put too much responsibility on her, the oldest child shouldn't feel burdened by the younger ones and it's not their job to look after them and she's allowed to make mistakes and dont be too strict on her, cause i'm the only oldest in my family (mom is middle, dad is baby) and i feel pressured and i feel that i have to live up to a higher standard than my little sister

Answer 6

See if getting her more involved and being Mommy's little helper works. Sometimes kids just want to be involved. If you are spoiling her now you have to remember kids are smarter than you think, she could just be milking all the extra attention. She sees that she will get more attention and will continue the behavior till she gets bored.

Have you sat her down and a her learning level explained that there are new babies in the house who need her love and attention just as much as they need mommy and daddy let her take a leading role with them for a while like staying in the room with them or sitting with them while you do something (stay close by though) and let her with anything at all she might feel shoved aside even though shes not but at her age it might be what she perceives.

Let me know if any of this helped.

Answer 7

I noticed your name refered to #4 on board how far along are you because you also said the past two months she has been very upset, so it seems like she is not looking forward to this pregnancy she is probely thinking oh, no, not again.talk to her about how she feels about this baby.