6-year old waking up at night due to "nightmares"....?

Question

My almost 6 year old keeps coming into my room mulitple times a night complaining that she is having nightmares. I don't know if she really is or if she is using it as an excuse to come into my room. For a few nights I let her sleep on my couch in my room. That may have been a mistake. Last night I took her right back to her room right away twice, but on the third try, let her sleep on my couch again because I felt bad that maybe she WAS really scared. With her coming in 3 times, my 4 year old coming in 1 time and the baby up once, I was up 5 times last night. This has been going on now for a few weeks and I am SO tired! Any advice? Should I just make her go back to her room until she realizes it's not worth getting up? or should I be more understanding of her being "scared"?

Answer 1

What sort of things is she watching on TV?  Girls tend to get more scared of some of those nasty programs than boys.  Girls also seem to have more nightmares, an more intese nightmares than boys.  At her age, it is normal for their imagination to go a little wild, but you need to restrict her activities (TV programs, computer games, etc).  If this isn't an issue, sorry I am not sure why this is happening

Oh, and where's dad, is he still with you, or have there been recent changes in the family.  Possible security issues.

Edited to Add: Ok, That doesn't seem to be a problem.  Does she take a favourite cuddly toy to bed (my son used to do this for security).  Also, a night light?  My son went through a stage when he was about 5 where he would not sleep without the light (a bright one) on in his room.  At that age, their imagination becomes very active, and the light and cuddly toy helped him with his fears when he woke up.

Has she just started school.  Is she happy at school?

Answer 2

I love the blanket idea!

I haven't really had this as a problem but my middle does valiantly try to think of excuses to come to my room.  The one and only time I allow them in bed is during a thunderstorm.  They ARE scary and I'm awake anyways.    

Otherwise, you either stick to your guns and send her back which may be confusing for her if you allow your 4 yr old in your room.  If the blanket idea doesn't work, you could tell her she can sleep on the couch if she doesn't wake you first.  

Answer 3

Your daughter probably does feel scared or at least sad when she wakes up alone, and probably goes right back to sleep as soon as she is close to you.  Talk to your daughter and explain that she is making you lose sleep, and that Mommies need sleep or else they get crabby, and crabby Mommies aren't fun.  Maybe you could let her come in at nights if she agrees to silently slip onto the couch when she's scared?  (No talking!)  Or maybe she needs a night light, or can have an alarm clock that will wake her up at a more decent hour to let her know it's safe to go to see her Mommy, like, 6:45.  If you think about it, isn't it the sweetest thing that your daughter just wants to be close to you?  In 5 years, she'll be a p*****n and will be changing inside and out.  :(  Cherish the sweetness of your little girl, I say- let her be a little lovie pie!  :D

Answer 4

We use a special blanket for when one of our children have a "nightmare" or even just wander into our room at night looking for a place to sleep. We now keep the blanket in the hall so if they wake up and wander toward our room, they will see the blanket first, grab it in a half sleep, and wander back to their beds (this habit took a couple weeks but is set in place now). Our children have learned that despite tears, storms, nightmares, or general night waking that the parent's room is just that, a room for parents only. When they started wandering in at night, we would pull out the special blanket, tell them the special blanket would keep them extra warm and safe, make sure they had their lovey (favorite stuffed animal) and put them back to bed. We usually leave their door mostly open with the hallway light on. Sometimes our 5 year old will wander down the hall and very silently lay down in our doorway (I am a pretty light sleeper and usually see his shadow and send him back to bed). It's been getting easier for us, maybe it will help you.