7 Month Old Won't Sleep By Himself...HELP!

Question

One night, when my son was about 4 months old, I fell asleep holding my son. Since then, he refuses to sleep by himself. He will only fall asleep in my arms and will stay in his crib for 3-5 hours if i'm lucky. If I don't put him in bed with me, he's up constantly through the night. I don't sleep well with him laying beside me. I know they say let them cry it out but with other people here, nobody wants to hear that throughout the night!

I ALSO DON'T NEED SOMEONE TELLING ME IT'S DANGEROUS FOR A BABY TO SLEEP IN THE SAME BED AS ME. IF YOU READ WHAT TO EXPECT THE FIRST YEAR, THEY ACTUALLY SAY IT'S GOOD. DON'T POST HERE IF THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY.

Answer 1

I have read that book and I find it very useful.  I had the same problem when my daughter was younger, she was three months and had colic, the only way that i could get her to sleep (other then strapping her car seat and taking her for a ride or putting her car seat ON top of the drier while turning it on) was to hold her close and rock her while in bed with her.  She would then finally fall asleep, after hours of crying, but if I moved her she would wake up and I would have to start all over.  I also couldn't sleep very well with her beside me (I had her head and neck resting on my arm, to remind me that she was beside me) but that was the only way I could get her to sleep.

She is now seven months and sleeps in her own room.  It wasn't easy (and I didn't let her cry it out, i can't stand to hear my baby cry for too long).  Now she is on a set routine at night, this is what we do:

7.15-7.30pm she gets 2-3 tbsp cereal mixed with formula

Then she gets a bath with lavender vanilla bath soak (made by baby aveno) and a rub with the same kind of lotion.  

I have a rocking chair in her room, so then I give her a bottle while rocking her in her room.  I rock her until she falls asleep ( i know that's probably another bad habit i'm starting, but it works) and then i give her her soother and transfer her to her crib.  

If she wakes up i try to rub her back to sleep, rub her tummy or her back if she has turned onto her stomach and if that doesn't work, I pick her up and rock her back to sleep.  I know it's a lot of work, and at first she woke up often, I did a lot of rocking.  But after a week she didn't wake up during the night (unless she lost her soother or is teething..) and now she is asleep by 8-8.15pm and sleeps right through until in between 7.30-9.30 in the morning (that depends on how loud my husband is when he is getting ready for work)  

All babies are different, and if something is done often, they come to get used to it and it becomes their routine, wether it was meant to be one or not.  So now, like what I had to do, is you have to try and create a new routine.  It won't be easy, it wasn't for me, but eventually it should work if you stick with it.  I'm not saying to let him cry, cause i never really let my daughter cry, I just spent a lot of time rocking her for the first few days, then it got better, and she now sleeps right through, without waking up at all during the night.  (unless she is teething or not feeling well of course)  I hope this helps.

Answer 2

if you want him to sleep in his crib then you have to stop letting him sleep with you. Mine would wake up all hours of the night until just about a week ago. but if your persistant enough he'll get used to his crib. just always put him back in his crib when he falls asleep. I use the cry it out method (give me a thumbs down if you must) it worked for both of my boys quite well. it usually just takes one time or maybe 2. if you cant hear him cry in the middle of the night try getting him used to falling asleep when he first goes to bed, at whatever time you do that, 8 is bed time for my kids. Put him in bed and jump in the shower. you wont hear him cry, and he should be tired enough to not cry for much more than 10 minutes if that. good luck, Im sure you will find a method that is right for you and your son.

Answer 3

i have told so many people to go to babies-r-us and buy a swaddler. yes it looks mean but its not. it keeps them contained so they cant move their feet and arms so they feel secure and feel like they are being held.. i used it for a bout 2-3 weeks with my son and now hes 4 months old and sleeps all night i only use it now for naps. he hates naps so i swaddle him and with in 15 mins hes asleep.

there is NOTHING wrong with your child sleeping with you..

Answer 4

I'd stick with a routine. If he wakes up in the middle of the night, hold him again until he falls asleep just like you do before you put him to bed at night. stick with it, and he'll sleep in his bed

Answer 5

There's nothing wrong with a baby sleeping with you as long as you are ok with it. To give the baby a better sense of security, use an infant swaddler. They range from $10.00 to $20.00 and can be purchased at Babies-r-Us and Walmart, that I know of.

Mabye use the thick flanel ones at first to simulate the bodyheat he is used to getting from you. A little later on, switch to the thinner ones.

At first after swaddling them, hold him for 10 minutes in a rocker with a pacifier in his mouth, then put him to bed...later on you will be able to put him to bed and only stand there for a few minutes...soon things will get easier for the both of you.

Hope this helps