7 year old looking up "s*x" online?

Question

My best friend found her 7 yo daughter doing web searches for "s*x." She confronted her and said she was just curious. My friend is upset because she wants her daughter to trust her and come to her with questions, instead of going behind her back. When her daughter asked her about s*x she told her simply that it is what people who are married do to make babies. She doesn't feel compelled to get into graphic details with a 7 yo. Now, she is having me ask this question because she doesn't know where to go from here. As of now, her computer priveledges have been taken away. She doesn't want to scare her daughter or make her feel like she's bad or dirty. What on Earth should she do?????

Answer 1

monitor her on the internet. a 7 year old is way to young to be on the internet unsupervised. i once typed in music and was led to a p**n site! i think that 7 is too young to have a real s*x talk but i think that what she told her is good enough for now. tell her to ask her daughter if she has any questions for the time being so she wont go looking for answers.

Answer 2

get a program for the internet to keep the 7 year old off of p**n sites...internet blockers are not expensive.  or be a responsible parent and watch the kid when she is on the internet.  She is 7...a little young for unrestricted internet access.

dont go into graphic details for a 7 year old, and ask her not to talk to her other friends so there isnt an epidemic of elementary schoolers taking about it.  Tell her it is nothing bad, but something that grownups do, not kids.

Answer 3

First of all I am so glad she has her off the net and so she should be till this is sorted. I searched d for something the other day and I hate to admit my naivety but I was blown away at what I saw!

She has no choice to deal with the "s*x" issue now............she has crossed the line but I would turn to a professional. Maybe through her church or if not a psycho-analyst. They will help her guide her to make the discussions healthy and constructive and not shame her daughter.

Answer 4

At age 7, her mom should begin teaching her the basics. It is a fact of life and she needs to be taught that so she knows it's nothing bad. Also, she shouldn't have been "found" searching on the internet. At 7 years old all computer use should be supervised.

Answer 5

I understand no 7 yo should be courious about s*x yet but i think there is a way to block some web sites i just dont know how she should go to her nearest electronic store and see if they know

Answer 6

All material should be closely monitored.

Bees and Birds questions come best from a trusting adult.

We never used computers to find that krap out.  We looked at books that gave healthy answers.  Internet is great but be there to see what's being viewed.

Answer 7

Wow, that's young to be questioning s*x.

In my opinion it's time to give her the basics, she's obviously curious.

Edit: On a side note, it might not be a bad idea to ask her who or what made her interested in learning about s*x.

Answer 8

I dont think that she should punish her for curiousity. If she is punished then she will think that it is a bad thing. I think she should tell her that its something they can talk about when they are older, and it's an adult thing, that girls like her age shouldnt be thinking about.

Answer 9

7 is a little young to be on the internet unsupervised.  Her mother should sit down with her and ask her why she looked up s*x and where she heard the word.  Then if she asks for a fuller explanation, the mother should tell her that s*x is something that she will learn about and experience later in life.  Her mother shouldn't take internet completely away but she should have her internet use limited to an hour a day and it should be supervised.

Answer 10

Well,you can block adult content from being seen on your/her computer....and I don't think she should "do"anything.If she doesn't make a big deal out of it-then(hopefully)her daughter will not make a big deal out of it, and soon the incident should be forgotten.And,when she is at least an adolescent-then the subject can be brought up.

Answer 11

u should tell ur friend to tell her daughter to come to her with questions and she prolly looked up s*x online cause maybe she heard it at school from one of the other kids or something maybe she should talk to her daughters teacher cause it could aslo be a signed that shes being molested at school or something and yeah a 7 yr old has no bussiness on a computer unless its for kid games like neopets or something :)

Answer 12

First, off, she should never let her child use the Internet without parental supervision...that goes for all young kids.

Second, she should just answer her daughter's questions.

She might want to ask her daughter casually what she has learned about s*x.  This way she can correct any misinformation her daughter has at this point.

Answer 13

she needs to be honest with her daughter and tell her all the facts and not some b-s explanation.

her daughter is obviously going to find out elsewhere if she doesn't.

if she wants to be trusted by her daughter in the future then she needs to start being honest with her now.

Answer 14

I always felt that an open relationship with your children is the best thing.  She doesn't want to alienate her daughter but at the same time there should be boundaries.

If she is seven and looking up 's*x' on the internet its obvious that she is curious about it.  I would personally in this case sit down with her and explain about s*x.  It's time for 'that talk".  I know that most parents don't want to do this until their children are at least 12 or 13, but the kids these days have access to information and influences that we did not have at that early age.

Ignoring it and giving excuses like "that's what married people do to make babies" will only make her more curious!  If she doesn't have Mom explain it to her then she may find out some other way.  This should be a converstation shared between Mom and daughter...not daughter and a friend down the street, or a school counselor.

It may seem akward for your friend to talk to her daughter about this subject now at this age, but if she wants to have a trusting relationship with her and let her browse the internet basically unsupervised she needs to explain what it is that she doesn't want her to see and that s*x is a beautiful thing and not everyone on the internet depicts it that way.

This will open a door and she can then say "Anything you feel like you need to look up online, I want you to come see me about so we can talk about it...I am not mad at you and I want you to be able to come to me if you have questions."

Answer 15

Millions of parents lie to their kids about s*x when they're that young, she'll most likely find out what it is from a classmate or something. Little kids like to brag about that kinda knowledge. Sorry, but there really is no good way to handle this. If the parent tells her the details, she won't have developed the "reverence" (for lack of better word) for s*x and might "experiment" or something before she's ready, it's happened. Everybody I know learned about it on their own, handled it on their own, and turned out normal. So I guess that's what your friend should do, let her daughter handle it on her own, but supervise her daughter to be safe.

Answer 16

talk to the daughter properly. The only reason that she would of looked it up was that the answer she gave didnt fill the void. It doesnt have to be graphic or detailed. It just has to explain it enough to stop her from wondering. Dont take computer time away, its better they look it up online rather then look for other methods.

Answer 17

A 7 year old curiosity shouldn't be punished.

Even if she saw graphic images she and her mind couldn't understand them.

Let her be, just put a safe search "on" in computer.

If she was 12 I'd worry, but at 7; no.

Answer 18

She should tell her daughter that it is okay that she is curious about s*x but she wants her to ask her the questions if she wants to know anything because its not safe on the internet.

Answer 19

Tell her that she can come to her wit any questions and that looking stuff up isnt always safe.Set parental controlls on the comp.

Answer 20

I would do a little research on talking to kids about tough situations. But when they need to know the truth, they need to know. When talking about s*x to a 7 year old, its is a very hard thing to explain, this happened to my cousin and her daughter. She sat her down and said; "s*x is a very complicated thing to describe to you right now, you need to know that it is not your time to know. If you ever have questions about stuff ask me when i'm not busy and we can sit and talk about it." THen ask her if she has any questions, then they'll be easier to understand and answer the question in the vagust way you can. s*x is not something that needs to be discussed(just yet) with a seven year old especially.

Good luck to you both! :)

Answer 21

Start educating her a bit at a time. Install a filter on the computer.

Answer 22

It is natural to be curious. If her mother isn't going to be honest with her about what s*x is, she will find out from somewhere else. I also believe that by taking away her computer privileges it is sending the message that what she was doing was wrong, when all she was doing was seeking information.

I believe her mother should tell her what the act of s*x is. If she feels too uncomfortable there are books for children that explain it (using robot pictures so there is nothing graphic).

Answer 23

she should ask her daughter what exactly

she wants to know about it?

i mean it doesnt hurt to answer right?

yes take the comp away..

it could get gross.

just have her talk to her daughter about it.

what she needs to know and why she is so curious

about it

hope i helped.

best of luck.

(:

Answer 24

why did she take away her computer!? she should make sure her daughter understands now to come to her if she has questions and thats it. punishing her is not good, cus really she didnt do anything she knew she wasnt supposed to do.

Answer 25

I think she needs to explain a little more than that in order to form trust like she wants. When I was a kid my parents bought me a children's book adressing the issue. There are many out there that gently educate and also instill values while at it. Given as a present from her mom she should learn that she can be a source of honest information.

Then, protect her kid from offesive web sites. Try this page http://personalweb.about.com/cs/viewings...

for tips on how to do that.

I hope it works out :)

Answer 26

She should sit down with her and talk things out, Why is it she is looking this stuff up if she didn't hear or learn it from someone, maybe something happened to her. I don't think she should be punished for trying to find something out. If she wants her daughter to trust and talk with her, then she should do just that, not confuse her more and make her wonder.

Answer 27

She was very curious and she had to of heard something from peers. I would not give her all details, but tell her when she is ready you will talk to her about it.

Answer 28

Okay well, sometimes, it's good to be honest with your daughter or son. Dont spill too much detail but comfort them and tell them they can talk to you about anything. Don't make her feel bad or dirty because shes not. Shes just a curious little girl. Try to answer her questions though. If you do she wont go behind your back and try anything. Remember shes 7 years old, not 3years old and definitely not 15.

Answer 29

She could always sit her daughter down, and not have a full on s*x talk, but get her to ask any questions that she is curious about. That way the daughter won't be as inclined to go searching the internet for answers.

Or alternatively, curiosity is unavoidable so she could just put a filter on the internet connection/browser, that way she could block the p**n and things she doesn't want her daughter to see but still allow some of the informative more tame sites through.

Answer 30

I think she should be honest with her. Obviously she is already hearing things at school and I'm sure most of it is incorrect. But why does a 7 year old have open access to the Internet?

Answer 31

be homnest with her daugther you dont have to get into graphic de tails say some thign like when a male and a female get older they have feelings for each other they expresss them in more ways than world through s*x you should only do it with your husband