78-year old father going deaf...how to help?

Question

My father is going deaf. He won't admit that he has trouble keeping up with conversations. He copes by picking up on key words and then taking the talk to a different topic where he can expound without input from others in the group. The problem is that people have stopped really talking to him and will drift away, until he is left by himself.

I feel badly for him. I'm sure the isolation can't be good for his self-esteem. I think lack of communication will also lead to memory loss and detachment from life in general.

My mom and sisters and I have gently suggested that he go for a hearing test and possible hearing aid. He laughs us off. (Sometimes I wonder if he understands what we're saying.) I have to add here that my father is extremely vain. He works hard to maintain a youthful image. He likes to keep up with modern technology and hang out with young people. He dyes his hair and exercises so that he can look good. So I can see that wearing a hearing aid just goes against the youthful image he wants to present.

What should I say or do to help him overcome his resistance to the hearing aid? Should I even do anything?

Your thoughts and comments would be most welcome.

Answer 1

There are plenty of rock stars who wear hearing aids. Your father can dye his hair all he wants, he's 78 and his skin and his body tell the truth, he's not kidding anyone. He can be who he is, a 78yr old man and still take advantage of youthful friends and a modern world. THAT'S what keeps him young, not Mr. Clairol. Your father is being stupid for no good reason. If he can't hear what is being said, how can he participate? Have your mom insist on a general check up, and tell her to talk to the doctor about his hearing in advance of the appointment. Bottom line, alot of people need hearing aids we live in a world of noise. If Keith Richards and Eric Clapton can wear hearing aids, so can your dad.  

Answer 2

My dad is the exact same except not as vain though he must be at some level because he does not want to wear hearing aids.  It is tough because he gets mad at us for him not being able to hear!  He says, "I can't hear you"! as if we are talking under our breath or intentionally talking low.  It is very frustrating.  Maybe take him to a hearing aid place and at least make him try them on and decide from there.  

Answer 3

My dad was the same way, my mom was able to talk his dr into talking to him about getting his hearing checked. He didn't want to at all until the dr said to him, "Do you ever want to hear your wife say "I Love U" or your kids saying that the youngest grandson has just had his first baby etc. That talk from his dr worked. We got his hearing checked. He has the hearing aids but doesn't wear them all the time. When company is coming or he is going out, he will wear them, but around the house, he doesn't care to.  If we have something important to talk to him about, he will put them in but otherwise, he claims, he has  heard it all before and has heard enough in his life.