9 month old misbehavior

Question

I am the first time mother of a nine month old that is the sweetest little girl in the world. In the past couple of weeks she has started to scratch and slap when she doesn't get her way. She gets frustrated when we don't understand what she wants and she will arch her back and scream. How do I get her to stop this before its to late? I don't know where else to turn...

Answer 1

It's not to soon to start time outs!!! remove her from the situation and tell her firmly that it not nice to hit,bite,scratch.whatever. The time out is a safe spot like a play pen or a spot on the floor in front of her room. The time out is only lik 30 sec long but it gives her a chance to calm down if she gets madder and screams, tell her calmly that you cant understand her and to and you'll listen when shes calm. I have a 2 and 3 yr old and this has worked very effectivly with both of them. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 2

I am still going through that with my son too, he just turned 20 months. It is true, she is just frustrated, and just doesn't know the words to tell you. Grab her hand gently when she tries to lash out and say " NO that is not ok to hurt mommy.Point to different objects and say something like" ball? you want the ball? you don't have to scream, just calm down and show me what you want and i'll get it for you"she needs reassurance that you will help her if you can figure out what she wants to tell you ( not always easy , I know)

Good luck sweetie!

Answer 3

I know this is a hard time I have had it with both my boys, and I found the best way to deal with it is to ignore her if you are holding her when it happens put her down somewhere safe and make it obvious you are not paying attention, then when she stops pick her up and put her back on your knee or however you had her before, don’t make any reference to the little tantrum at all just carry on as before she will soon get the message that she gets more attention when she isn’t being silly. As for the understanding her I am afraid this is trial and error it wont take you long to work out what she needs you could even encourage her to show you what she wants. Hope all goes well.

Answer 4

Don't worry!  She's normal, all kids do it!  But keep in mind, she's not really "misbehaving".  She's too little to know that its wrong to hit.  You have to teach her its wrong.  

If you are holding her when she does it, tell her "no, you may not hit Mommy" in a stern, but not yelling voice, then put her down.  She'll cry, but she'll learn that if she hits, she doesnt get you.  (And really, all she wants is her mommy, right?)  Be consistent with the reaction and she'll soon learn that hitting means mommy gets mad and won't hold her.  

As far as getting frusterated when you don't understand, well, yeah, wouldn't you get mad if you tried to communicate and no one understood?  Teach her sign language - most babies can start as early as 6 months, but don't expect her to actually sign until closer to 1 year.  Most kids can repeat and understand signs by 10 months.  My daughter wouldnt do it until 12 months, but she understood the signs (mine is very very stubborn).  Check out the book Baby Signs or look online.  I found it got her talking quicker once we used signs, so don't be fooled by the theory "if you teach them sign language they won't talk".  All the studies show that is not true.

Good luck, and remember to be patient, calm, and consistent!  Its hard, i know.  

Answer 5

She is doing this for attention.  Move stuff away from her that she can possibly get hurt on.  Don't leave her, but at the same time don't pay her any attention until after she calms down.  Once she realizes "wow it doesn't bother mom, I'm still not going to get my way"  she will eventually stop, or at least chill out on it a little bit.  Don't get discouraged if you don't see improvement the first few times, it may take some time, but eventually she will.

Answer 6

have you gone to the doctor and told him about this maybe he knows. and cut the little girls nails that way she can't scratch her self, other than that go check with the doctor may be he knows why your daughter is acting up.

Answer 7

All kids will do that.  She doesn't have the words to express herself, so this is how she's doing it.  Obviously, she can't get her way if it involves something or someplace where she'll get hurt.  You just need to stay calm and firm.  If you just can't figure out what she wants, that will just take some time.