A New Poem for you to critique?

Question

Not my best work, very spur of the moment. A tribute to the beginning of school

Ending and Beginning

The end of summer

Bitter ending

Sweet beginning

A melancholy feel

Spreads thought the air

New choices

Old habits

Mixing together

To form a person

You've never been before

Friendly faces

Enemies scowls

The comfort took

From you before

Coming back again

Clean cut clothes

Sagging eyes

The familiarity

Making you smile

A true smile once more

Missing pieces

Forgotten trouble

More beginnings

Starting around me

Other stories about to end

People's books

People's bags

All around me

To remind you

You're home again

Answer 1

Very long but I like it a lot it took me a while to read tho LOL but very nice

Please answer mine

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Answer 2

It;s not bad. Honestly it dosent sound very fit together though :/. After the 4th stanza it kind of just lags. But it has potential. What if you made a few changes like this?

Ending and Beginning

Bitter ending

Sweet beginning

A melancholy feel

Spreads thought the air

New choices and

Old habits

Mixing together to form a person

You've never been before

Friendly faces

Enemies scowls

The comfort took

Coming back again and again

The grievances crystallized of a hot summers end

Clean cut clothing

Sagging eyes

The familiarity

of a true smile once more

Missing pieces

Forgotten troubles

More beginnings

Starting around me

while other stories begin to fall

People's books

People's bags

All around me in line

the realization that you've returned

You're home again in time

It might not be what you're going for but it was fun to work on anyways :).

oh btw what do you think of my poem ?

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