A close friend of mine commited suicide last weekend?

Question

he hung himself and his son found him. he was a good person, a wonderful, loving father and a good dear friend. my heart is breaking for his children. i don't know how to deal with this or how to break the sadness i feel over his loss, the sadness i feel for not being a better friend, for not knowing how desperate and alone he must have felt. how do i get past these awful sad feelings that i have?

Answer 1

awh im really sorry! ive never delt with lossing someone. /:  

Answer 2

Accept The Intensity Of The Grief

Grief following a suicide is always complex. Survivors don't "get over it." Instead, with support and understanding they can come to reconcile themselves to its reality. Don't be surprised by the intensity of their feelings. Sometimes, when they least suspect it, they may be overwhelmed by feelings of grief. Accept that survivors may be struggling with explosive emotions, guilt, fear and shame, well beyond the limits experienced in other types of deaths. Be patient, compassionate and understanding.

Support groups is one of the best ways to help survivors of suicide. In a group you can connect with others who share the commonality of the experience. I would encourage you to call a local or a national crisis line and request resources information for survivors.

Answer 3

only time will tell... im sorry

Answer 4

There is no easy way past the feelings you have. They just get less intense as time passes. Some days you will wake up and feel not so bad about it. And some days you will wake up and be consumed by grief and guilt at what you "could have" prevented. Days like these will eventually become less frequent. It might take years.

My ex partner hung himself and I went through a whole range of emotions. It's been over a year and I still have nightmares.

It will take time, but you will get past it eventually.

Answer 5

I'm really sorry for your loss. But you have to understand that it is usually an impulsive act, this has nothing to do with your being/not being a good friend. All you can do is remember the good times that you spent with your friend n try to cheer up his children n help them any way you can.

Time heals the deepest of wounds...so give yourself time to get over it.

God Bless You.

Answer 6

I am sure there is a lot of guilt involved, but a lot of people with depression don't talk about how they feel.  They hide it so that no one will know how they feel.  Don't blame yourself.  I am sure there was nothing you could have done differently.

One thing that would really help though is to talk to his kids, especially his son!  Holy cow that would be hard to find your father that way!  They are probably feeling the exact same way you are.  They probably think if they would have been better children, he wouldn't have committed suicide.  Make sure that you tell them how you feel and let them know that they did nothing wrong.  

I have a close friend who attempted suicide.  He said that he wasn't thinking about how it would effect anyone else.  He just felt like he was worthless and he was being selfish and didn't want to live.  He said there was nothing that anyone else could have done differently!

Hang in there!

Answer 7

My father committed suicide when I was nine and I know deep down there was nothing I could have done, however there will always be that little feeling in the back of your head that maybe there was just one thing ..................It gets easier with time. Just remember that it it was his decision alone and you could not have changed anything. Just be there for his kids. Always keep his memory alive to them . And most of all let them know it was not their fault. They WILL feel that way even of they dont say it out loud. I think that will also ease your heart also. He would have wanted that I think..

Answer 8

ok see.... my friend did the same thing except his girlfriend found him. Basically anyone that was close to him or related to him is gonna think that.  His son, mom and any other close friends would feel like mybe just mybe they could of stopped it from ever happening.  Like they feel like they could of done more to make him happier.  He prob kept it inside and didnt wanna share it and the pressure got to him that he thought that was his only way out when he was just confused . You couldnt of done anything. just know there was nothing u could do.Just tell youself there was nothing you could do and that u would of helped him in anyway if u knew he was thinking of that. I thought the exsact same thing for months and he was my best freind. its hard to get over but u will slowely get over it .hoped anything i said helped u in any way.

Answer 9

just be there for his family and know that there was nothing you could have done