Darling," a husband whispered to his wife late one night, "if I died, would you get married again?"
"I suppose so," she replied.
"Would you sleep in the same bed with him?"
"Well, it's the only bed in the house, so I have no choice."
"Would you make love to him?"
"Honey," the woman said patiently, "he would be my husband."
"Would you give him my car?"
"No," she yawned, "He can't drive a stick shift."
A middle aged couple is watching TV when a TV Evangalist comes on and promises to heal the sick.
"If only you would pray with him and place your right hand in the air and place your left hand on the afflicted area."
So the man places his right hand in the air and his left hand on his crotch and his wife says "Gee honey He said heal the sick, not raise the dead!"
Tags: