A day in a golf writers' life
A golf writer is a person who thinks, eats, and sleeps golf. Proof of the notion comes from a simple story that dates back to January 13th 2011.
One fine morning, I woke up to find my Siamese cat pregnant. Well that was good news for me, as I happen to be a pet lover. I took her to the vet, who told me that it would take another two months and I would become the proud owner of four to five kittens.
Two months passed and I nearly forgot that the big date was on 13th January.
The Sony Open, which is a PGA event was about to hit the news circuit on the same date, which meant that a sequence of news articles and players profiles would start pouring in any minute.
As, there are few golf writers in our team, therefore, I was at ease that I will not have to fight for the news unlike our football writers.
Late at night I was working on an article when I heard my cat groaning. I rushed towards her and found five little kittens lying in the basket beside her. The first sight of those five, tiny creatures shocked me, as I have never seen a living thing so delicate and small.
After careful observation, I found that there were three male kittens and two females. Now, my first thoughts were what to name them. Different names started pouring in. John, Colin, Tiger etc.
My eyes tried focusing on the little beauties and suddenly fixed on a kitten that had a fat tummy. A kitten with a fat tummy seems strange, which is why my eyes were caught by this unusual sight.
Avoiding the mother cat, I picked up the little one and found that it was a male. Thinking to myself, “Ok, this one is a boy, which means I have to think of a manly name. How about John, after all, he has a huge oversize tummy just like John Daly (a well-known golfer with a tummy bombing out of his shirt)”.
The first name was decided. The kitten with the biggest tummy was well suited to John Daly.
Next, it was the turn of the one, who was standing over the chest of his mother. On my careful observation, I noticed that this kitten was relatively bigger in size than the rest and he was braver as well.
He stood at the top like a captain, who would go to the winner‘s podium to take the trophy for the Ryder Cup. Yes, he was a captain. While, I was thinking all this, I noticed that he lowered his head into his mom’s fur and lifted his bottom slowly and shook it.
Colin Montgomerie, who led the European team in 2010 Ryder Cup, repeats a similar motion, while hitting a shot on the tee. He bends down a little, stretches his huge body to the fullest, and shakes his buttocks in a funny, but similar manner.
As a result of this pondering, the second kitten was named Colin.
Now, I was left with three more kittens and I was terribly tired. Therefore, I decided to sit down on the rug by the fireplace and just then I noticed that one of the little ones, elegantly walked towards the ladies with the confidence of a tiger.
He walked slowly and silently towards them and stopped near one of them. As he stopped, he swiftly moved his head near the shy one and rubbed it against hers. I noticed that the silent one walked towards the other female and repeated the same act.
The other cat licked his face and as she finished doing it, this little player purred in his highest voice and pumped his right arm towards his face. Just then, a thought crossed my mind that my little kitten shared traits with Tiger Woods. As he was smooth with the ladies, and celebrated his victory with a ‘yes’.
An hour or two into this exercise I realised that I had been naming cats after golfers. Therefore, it proves that a golf writer sleeps, eats, and thinks golf.
(The views expressed in this article are solely of the writer's and do not represent bettor.com's editorial policy)
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