A family friends daughter has Brain Cancer?

Question

I found out today that a daughter of one of my mothers friends has brain cancer, shes only 10 years old. Both her parents are in complete shock right now and shes scheduled for some sort of operation next week, and also her older sister has down syndrome and needs help constantly... Everyones totally devastated that this has happened and my mom keeps wanting to visit the girls mother but i dont think its a good idea yet seeing as she doesnt want to talk to anyone at the moment. i wanted to know how if there are some good ways we could support them

Answer 1

I would offer to take the Downs syndrome girl out for an hour or two, or sit with her for a while, so that is one less person for the family to worry about. You could ask your mum to make a casserole to take around there, because the family are probably not too crash hot at cooking or shopping right now.  

Answer 2

Your mother should get on the phone or go to her friends house to talk to her friend. All she needs to do is say she is sorry and how much she cares. Nothing else is required . . except acknowledge that this happened. This family already feels miserable and they will not feel any less miserable today or next week or next year. The mother may not want to talk about what has happened because she may not be able to face the medical situation. But she will find her way. In the meantime the family needs to do that people are concerned about them. If your mom doesn't want to call or visit . .than send a card . .immediately. Many weeks from now her friend will not recall what was said or who said it . . but she will remember that your mother sent a card, called, or was there to support her.  Trust me on this. I've been there.

Answer 3

Oh my goodness, what a sad situation.

The best thing you can do is just being there for the family, you could also offer to look after the other sister while her sister is having her operation, or mind her for a few hours when they need it. Maybe even prepare for a few meals and freeze them, so they have some ready meals to throw into the microwave.

When you talk to the family keep the conversation light and normal as possible, and try not to become emotional in front of them if you can help it.

I hope everything goes well and the outcome is a good one