A hindu girl married to muslim boy through special marriage act?

Question

Sorry to be disturbing you but I am troubled beyond words for the past one month. Mine was a love marriage and have been married for one and half years now. We are both well placed with good jobs. I am a Hindu and only child to my parents and my husband is a Muslim. I had great trouble convincing my parents for this and our wedding was finally solemnized under the special marriage act after my husband assured me and my parents that I need not convert to Islamism during any part of my life. Based on his assurances my parents did perform our wedding after his acceptance only in our Hindu style with minimum formalities and held a grand reception for us. His parents though did not acknowledge or attend our wedding. Ever since he has followed his customs and I have followed mine and have had a peaceful life so far as we both shared enough space to each other’s life. I am basically very tolerant towards other religions and have never interfered with his faith. My parents also have been very understanding to his beliefs and faith and have always celebrated his festivals in the same manner as ours. Now everything was smooth until last month and we are staying with my parents. Suddenly sometime in the beginning of last month my husband revealed to me, that his parents were unaware of our wedding so long and that he had conveyed to them only a few days before and that they were very upset. Trouble started thereafter wherein his parents have been insisting that I would have to perform a Nikah in their style for which I would have to convert to Islamism, which I do not want to do. If it is his birthright to follow his religion so is mine. I have never had the intention to convert him to Hinduism at any part of my life. Due to his parents emotional pressure and influence he is trying to coax me into the wedding saying that It will be only for one day to announce to his people and thereafter I can continue to be what I am [ remain a hindu]. His father wants me to sign a stamp paper acknowledging that I am willing for their Muslim style of wedding, which I am scared to do because it may lead to some legal complications. As a girl I fought for my life with my parents and I expect him to do the same too. I do not want to cheat both sides and cannot dramatize my whole life. Moreover I have promised my mother that I will not convert and change my religion at any cost till I live and I cannot let down my parents who have done so much for my life. All these things I had already told my husband before marriage and only because he accepted to it I agreed for the wedding. He also promises me that once the nikah is over we can convert back to Hinduism through an Arya Samajam registration. Does law permit this and how safe is his proposal. Now I do not want to lose my marriage as well as my parents. Please advice and help me out on this as both are precious to me. My life is miserable.

Answer 1

All I can say is that you are in a very complicated situation. I am a Muslim and I am from Bangladesh. We do have lots of inter-religious marriage mostly Muslim Male with Hindu Female, but a few exceptions are also where it is the other way round.

In almost 90% of the cases the Hindu gets converted into the Muslim religion by way of having an Affidavit from the Court and then gets married under Muslim rituals and rites. In a few cases we found that such marriages end-up in divorce when either of the parties relatives starts poking their nose or when the parents of the either parties gets emotionally or religiously involved and tries to 'amend', the way you have narrated in your case.

I can understand what your husband is telling you and why he is insisting, even though this is akin to his abrogating gentleman's agreement made with you prior to your marriage to him. Since you also are trying to be 100% ethical and true to your words given to your parents, I do not see much 'happiness' in this marriage, if not outright divorce procedure started from either of the parties.

I just hope and pray that some way is found so that all the sides feel win-win situation and you are not separated.

Btw, I was amazed to know from reading the Answer of "vijay m" that goes like: "He being Muslim by religion has a legal right to have four wives simultaneously but ...". I hope he makes in-depth study and find it out if his statement is accurate or not. At least one will go to jail if he starts the frenzy of getting more than one wife without having gone through the very stringent requirements needed of which the first and foremost is the consent of the first wife to marry for the second, not to talk about 3rd or 4th. May be Mr. Vijay has been reading too much of Arabian tales in 21st century (lol).

Answer 2

Any act without due consideration over its aftereffects will brew untold miseries and agony.  You have done that. Where was the need for you to marry a person from another religion that too when you are a educated person capable of taking decisions foreseeing what could happen in future. For you it appears love had prominence and proved love is blind.   My advice to you is to be bold and stick to your decision what come may. I close with this couplet which will be helpful to you if you can understand the language.

TUM MAY HIMMAT HAI TO DUNIYA SAY BAGAVATH KARLO

WARNA MAA BAAP JAHAAN KAHTEY HAIN SHADI  KARLO

Answer 3

Now listen my dear child once you both got married under the Special Marriage Act,1954, no matter which form of marriage now you both under go with each other, your first marriage under the Special Marriage Act,1954 will ONLY be legally recognized between both of you. You both are now covered under this Act only for the purpose of any matter relating to Matrimonial affairs between both of you. He being Muslim by religion has a legal right to have four wives simultaneously but since he fortunately for you got married to you under this Act he has become bound by the provisions of this Act wherein he now cannot marry second time with any one else till this marriage with you under this Act subsists i.e. till this marriage get dissolved by the decree of divorce. If in case he by mistake or on being misguided by his relatives or any other persons marries again during the existence of your marriage with him then he shall be liable for the offence of bigamy which otherwise he would not have been had he married you by converting you to Muslim Religion then got married you by Nikha Ceremonies according to Shariat Muslim Laws. His parents are not aware of your marriage according to the Special Marriage Act, 1954 or even if they are aware of this they don't understand the Legal importance of this marriage which has bound both of you in the surest marriage which the law recognizes irrespective of your Caste, Religion. Creed, Nationality. The very fact you never changed your religion still you are legally married in the eye of law, your refusal for conversion to Muslim religion will not give him even a ground for dissolving this marriage on this ground or even if you convert to Islam it won't give him a ground to give you divorce since you changed your religion. What I want to tell you here that the religion of either party to the marriage under this Act has no bearing as far legality is concerned whereas for Religious marriages such as Hindu Marriages covered under the Hindu Marriage Act,1955 or Muslim Marriages under the Muslim Shariat Law  the religion of both parties has to be same, but once you are already married either of these Religious marriages has no legal implications whether he converts to Hindu Religion & you again marry according to Hindu form of marriage or you convert to Muslim religion & marry according to Muslim Shariat Law. These Religious Marriages will just be Social Religious Drama; the law will only recognize your Marriage under the Special Marriage Act, 1954 for all purposes. As far changing religion is concerned any person can change his or her religion as many times he or she wants, laws doesn't debars anyone for doing unless the Personal religious laws/rules of the religion one wants to re-enter stops him or her to do so. As far conversion to Hindu Religion through Arya Samaj Mandir is legally recognized wherein Shudikaran ceremony takes place in presence of two witnesses & a Valid Conversion Certificate is issue by the Arya Samaj Mandir. However I don't understand why this conversion & re-conversion business is to be done in your case as your Civil Marriage under the Special Marriage Act, 1954 is legally valid for all purposes. Sorry to say but all this conversion & re-conversion business people talk about here or any where else is nothing but foolishness nothing more when Civil laws exist for inter-caste/inter-religious/inter-nation... marriages in India. Edit: - For the information of 'slsmhu' I only stated the legal right of Muslim Man in India to legally have more then one wife up to four maximum based on the Shariat Muslim Law not any Arabian Nights Stories, what all the necessary requirement to have a second or third or fourth wife I have not discussed nor I intent to go in those depth. There is no where laid down for a Muslim man to have two or more wives its entirely up to his own choice based on the legal conditions as provided by the Shariat Muslim Law. I should be checked if I state any wrong legal issue as all my information’s as based on the Law of the land & not on Arabian Night Stories which people like you may be following. The real trouble starts with most of people like you when I talk about Civil Matrimonial Laws followed in India for inter-religious marriage; even people like you in India are only responsible for non implementation of Uniform Civil Code as promised under Article 44 of The Constitution of India. You being a citizen of Bangladesh should mind issues which concern your country's legal system & let Indian lawyers to help out Indian citizen manage their legal problem as was asked by this member.