A lot of users in here say no to the cane and smacking which is fair enough?

Question

Would you have been less appalled if the mother had slapped the teenage girl that clearly deserved it?

I was bought up to know right from wrong and i also got a clip round the ear which never did me any harm, i don't believe in the cane and nobody will punish my boy's except me but what would you do if you had raised them right and taught them right from wrong and they still turned out like that cocky little cow who reported her father.

Would it make you a bad parent? would it mean you had failed to raise them properly because, although they know right from wrong they still chose to be that way.

At what point do you hold the child responsible and not the parents? The problem that we are facing now is kids know that they can do basically whatever they want and get away with it, lets face it what will happen to them? they know they wont get smacked and an ASBO to them is a status symbol.

If smacking, the cane and national service are all deemed to extreme or it breaches their human rights to give them national service what do you suggest Parents do? remember parents and teachers powers have been eroded away for years and the kids know this.

Your thoughts please.

Answer 1

Spare the rod and spoil the child, which is why we have so many lawless hoodies in Britain. No discipline equals no respect for the law.

Answer 2

Here in India, we still believe in 'spare the rod & spoil the child'...and tho' my Mum & Dad never ever raised their hands on me & my brother & sister, one look from them was enough for us to know that they meant business. It wasn't fear so much as respect. They made it very clear to us from the time we were infants that they loved us unconditionally but that it was their job to see that we grew into responsible adults...a job they took very seriously. They made it clear that they would do all it took to ensure this. i once, in a fit of fun, asked my Mum whether my Dad would walk me down the aisle if i dared marry someone who knew was bad news. My Mum blandly replied that i would have to crawl down the aisle as he would have broken my legs. Rest assured, my Dad wouldn't hurt a fly, i don't even remember him raising his voice at me. Hes gentle as can be. But that dry comment from my Mum gave me the message loud & clear that this was something i shouldn't even dream of venturing into. Its not about fear...its about knowing what your folks want for you & respecting that its out of love you. Discipline brought about this way, can only be positive.

Answer 3

So its not ok for a father to slap his daughter for being a thug - but it is okay for people to have their babies ears pierced - the world has gone mad

Answer 4

The 1989 Child Act was a wonderful idea, meant to spare innocent children harm.

BUT did it save Victoria Climbe, Natasha or Tiffany?

( SADLY there's others )

No.

Unfortunately it's a flawed & biased system that allows the undisciplined, lacking any parental guidance, out-of-control generation of teenagers to run rings around the justice/education systems, social services & the police.

Taking away a parents right to mete out a smack, in the right circumstances is now giving the biggest backlash the UK will ever see.

IT was bound to happen.

Obviously it still doesn't take in to account some parents didn't actually have children to raise them but just to increase their benefits.

Now they have children without limits or boundaries they expect the Nanny State to do all the hard work for them.

How to put it right?

I think it will take a revolution, of sorts.

It won't be easy & it won't happen over-night.

said it before saying it again.

common sense needs to return to the UK.

Answer 5

My honest opinion is that it can be very hypocritical. We berate men that beat their wives, and god forbid a child hit a parent, so why is it ok to hit a child? I just think that there are better ways to parent and discipline a child at any age. I was never hit and I turned out just fine. I don't have any ASBOs and I was taught respect.

However, I in no way condone calling the police. That to me smacks of a spoilt brat who hasn't been disciplined in ANY way before.

EDIT: If the mother had hit her my opinion would remain the same. Slapping a female across the face is not smacking a child, it's violence and I will not condone it, parent to child or otherwise. What parent's can do is to instill the correct morals and values without violence, it is possible. Of course, the ultimate would be to repeal the human rights act, it is a load of bollocks anyway. Kids don't need to know their "rights" anyway, I didn't, but I still respected elders.

Answer 6

My daughter smacks her children, and they're a damned sight better behaved than some of the brats they go to school with.

I work in a small supermarket, and just tonight a little girl came running into the shop demanding sweets. Her mother said no, and the child screamed the shop down, and then bit a chunk out of her mothers hand. My hand was itching to slap the brat, and I know my daughter would have had it been one of her kids, but on the other hand, my daughter's children wouldn't have dared behave like that, as they would know what was coming.

There's far too much "mamby-pambying" these days, and look at the state of the Country? A good sharp slap on the back of the legs when they were young, would solve a lot of today's youth problems, if only the "do-gooders" would realise that.

I never held back from slapping my kid's, and they've grown up respecting us, and have NEVER given us problems, have all grown up decent human beings, and have never resented us for giving them the odd slap. Child abuse? What about parent abuse, system abuse, respect abuse, authority abuse,Property abuse??? The brats are taking over, and the "mamby-pamby's" are letting them!!!!

Answer 7

To be honest, I never believed a man should hit a child, a mother, yes if needs be....but sometimes the child has no fear of the mother because we tend to go soft.....

In the case of the father and teenager, he said he doesn't regret it, maybe he don't, but it was his first time slapping her, so maybe, talking, grounding etc... didn't work and now she has apologised to him for bringing the guards (police) into it..

So I would think respect for her father was already there but got lost along the way she has now pushed his button too far and got a slap. But I think the respect is still there..

Answer 8

I had the cane twice,had my knuckles rapped with the edge of a ruler,i've turned out OK.

Answer 9

You're right.  A little bit of pain never hurt anyone.

Answer 10

An adult being violent to a child is abhorrent to me.

Hit child - bad parent

Don't hit child - better parent

Answer 11

it says in the bible don't spare the rod, how can any christian disagree with that.

Answer 12

I'm not appalled at the father. I'm appalled at the  system.

The fact that violent crime has risen sharply since smacking became frowned upon is not a coincidence.

Answer 13

if you are talking about the father slapping his teenage daughter...i would have done exactly the same under the circumstances.  this girl was causing loads of problems in her neighbourhood & one neighbour felt terrorised by her.

parents should have the right to raise their child to be decent, honourable citizens...& if the kids run riot - they need a clip round the ear!!  why should innocent people have their lives disrupted by a naughty teenager!

Answer 14

i believe sometimes we all could do with a good slap