A love lost,and I dwell constantly on it ?

Question

I fell in love with this lady,we lived together for six months.I had to go overseas and lost all contact.For the last ten years,she has been in my thoughts from the moment I wake up to when I dream she is next to me before I fall asleep.How can you get over a person?I haven't found anyone to replace her....she is and always will be my dream girl,I obsess over her constantly.Will my heart ever be repaired?

Answer 1

find her online peoplefinder.com

type her full name first middle and last then select the city/country she was last in that you knew about they are a super big help i tracked down a brother i've never seen or knew only a first and last name  

Answer 2

You can try to find her using people search

Most likely u will always love her no matter what happens I feel the same way about someone and it does not get easier sorry

Answer 3

listen to, "dreaming with a broken heart" by john mayer...noone is out of reach anymore...if you're willing to throw down a couple hundred bucks, you can DEFINITELY find anyone in the world.  if you're still thinking about her after all these years, maybe it's worth the investment....and think of how impressed she'd be to learn of how hard it was for you to find her....good luck

Answer 4

you allowed her to take a place of perfection and fantasy!  That is ok...but realize it is gone.  You can fantasize all you want  but if it is interfering with you life you need to seek help.  For some reason you aren't letting go of something that is not real.

We all dream of the one that got away...but it doesn't mean it would have been perfect or we would have been happy.  You are denying yourself a life of happiness by dreaming.  WAKE UP!  give yourself a chance to live!

Give yourself a reality check each time you start to think of her.  You are allowing it to happen.    She is your dream girl...but come on..if it was meant to be ...it would have been.  YOU AND HER let it go...so it wasn't mean to be.  Just because you go overseas a few months shouldn't end a relationship.  My huband and I were apart two years and we have been married 40 years!   It was meant to be and we committed ourselves to each other and life together.  You obviously didn't.  You would not have lost contact.  It is clear she wasn't as attracted as you or she would have stayed in contact too.  You don't let someone you love get away.  I mean come on..today communication is so much easier and quicker..we had snail mail and phone calls overseas was very expensive and nearly impossible back then.  Now you  have cell phones and computers etc and it  is much easier.

I do believe that where we are in life is exactly where we are supposed to be.  There are no lost chances....or no accidents.  We make choices...conscientiously or unconscientiously...and then we live by them.

so now it is time to grow up a little and get on with life and stop dreaming of the one that got away and find the one that will share a life with you.  AND STOP comparing others to her.  What she was wasn't enough for you to hang on tightly to...so someone is going to be better than her...

Answer 5

Well from  the way things sound I'm a bit younger than you, but it happened to me once. Not for ten years, but still. My only solution was to track the guy down and see what happened.

Maybe that's what you should do?

It may be the only way that you can stop obsessing about her. Find her, try to be with her. At least this way you'll get closure if it doesn't work out or if she's married or something, and who knows, maybe she's available!  

Answer 6

You should put that to song...........love hurts....call her, look her up!! I have always though that love can come and go. Not that one forgets but simply one can move on. You seem to prove that theory wrong.  If you choose to look for her, maybe after you find her you'll see that what you still love is the girl she used to be and not the woman she is today? Gosh, I wish you all the best.

Answer 7

that is so sweet. i suggest you look for her and see how she feels.its easy to find people these days.

p.s. if your a stalker, dont take my suggestion

Answer 8

For the past 10 years ? WOW ! You are one of those real lovers buddy ! :) First of all why don't you go try to find out where she is now, and if you don't or if you do and if she is already with someone else, then don't be heartbroken, meet new people..eventually you will find someone like her or may be better than her. I hope you do :)  

Answer 9

Ten years is quite a long time I'm sorry buddy...I don't think people ever get over lost loves really. Sometimes it can hurt a little less each day..even if its only a tiny bit. Be glad you have the memories you have with her and there's nothing more to do but go on living with them. Broken hearts never heal but they can be mended enough to keep working.

Answer 10

Key word, obsess!  You have likely put this person on a pedestal which she does not belong.  People tend to remember the good times and forget the bad.  I was going to say time will heal your wounds but 10 years...  I think your best chances are to find someone to fill the void in your heart.

Answer 11

i know exactly how you feel bro. sure im 16 your probably alot older.. but it age doesnt prevent you from knowing love right?

i think because you had so many fond memories of being with her.. you think you'l never again experience with someone else what you had with her. dude trust me.. like the saying goes, theres plenty of fish in the sea. better fish too. purposely thinking about things like her sleeping beside you just adds to the obsession.. you need to put ur mind to other things that makes u happy. hobbies and stuff. she might always be your dream girl.. but when you find another girl that makes you happy.. who cares if she was your dream girl or not? as long as your happy not much matters. dwelling on the past wont ever bring it back.. look for someone new.

and love is pain lol. have a laugh about it. life is so much more than love.  

Answer 12

it will if you let it. the more you think about her the more you hurt right? just open your heart. if she's the one, she will come. in the meantime, you can wait and keep yourself occupied. enjoy life with your friends and family. love will lead you back :)

Answer 13

I'm seeing a therapist twice a week.  It takes constant work.  You need outside help and don't be ashamed about it, you need to live your life without constantly feeling like this.

Answer 14

i have had this happen to me it took me 2 years to get a nother gf

Answer 15

Have you ever thought or tried to get back in touch with her? It's possible that she may think about you ever so often as well. I can't promise you anything but like they say time heals all wounds and in your case, maybe a lot more time. Go ahead and try and get back in touch. Good luck! =)

Answer 16

you will never find anyone, because no girl can possibly stack up against your "dream girl" because youve set the bar to high (no pun intended lol)

Look up ya old flame..I bet shes not as perfect as you seem to think she is..lol..then move on and find someone who might not be perfect, but loves you anyway

Answer 17

There is no need to replace this lady as she and she alone occupies the whole in your heart.  Instead, you need to fill this hole in your heart with other things that you enjoy and hold dear.  You need to find your happiness from within, not from some single obsession.  Your heart will never be repaired per se......but you will discover new joys and heartaches  that will take some of your attention away.  Look within for your answers.

Answer 18

how cute... when you find her... dont let her GO.

and 10 years is A VERY LONG TIME !

and if you can't find her.

you might as well find another person you will grow to love.

there are millions of people out there.

the one for you is out there

just believe it !