A poem that's simple and short, your comments?

Question

The Venture

I reach, and I thirst.

I drink 'til I burst!

The depths are too deep

The mountains too steep,

But dive I must

Climb 'til I bust.

To fathom the reasons,

Explore all the seasons,

Of all we're given

To what we're driven

Until in peace

All efforts cease.

©May 26, 2008 Albert k. Jungers All rights reserved.

Answer 1

A delightful treat with my coffee!

Answer 2

Neat and sweet.

Answer 3

T'is quite the poetic muse this little piece.

  Indeed it is.

Answer 4

Now, this is my speed. Easy, pleasing, sometimes teasing...  

Answer 5

jolly good  

Answer 6

I like it. Good point. A lot to be said for brevity.  

Answer 7

Good simple little poem.  I would take a look at the last 2 lines.  The way I read it initially is until i die all efforts cease.  I think you're trying to say, until I die, my efforts WON'T cease.   It's pretty simple to get your meaning the way it is.  It's a good piece.

Suggestion:

Upon finding peace

All efforts cease.

Upon finding peace (this line could imply what is truly sought)  Even though some of that peace is found in all the previous lines and in their beauty.  Just seems to give a simple poem some depth.



Thanks for sharing it with us junkies :P

Answer 8

I like this drumbeat very much. This one is music.

Answer 9

There is always such a nice cadence to your short pieces.