A question for other Navy wives or husbands?

Question

My husband is in the Navy. Since marrying him, I have met so many other Navy wives who are totally wild. I'm not stereotyping (I've met plenty of decent, faithful wives) but I feel sometimes like I've been thrown into a completely strange world. For instance, my neighbor (whose husband is deployed a lot) picks up strangers on the weekends in bars and doesn't seem to care who knows. She even makes out with some of them in the yard and talks about it later, like it's no big thing. She is very promiscuous then when her husband comes home, it's all smiles and love, like she feels no guilt and is the most faithful wife in the world.

I love my husband dearly and could never imagine doing this. I can't imagine what goes through someones mind who behaves this way. I also can't imagine that her husband wouldn't know by now that she is doing this. Is this common in the Navy and why? How can someone cheat with a lot of different people, then act normally when the husband gets home? This astounds me.

Answer 1

In 16 years as a Navy wife I've never met anyone as blatant as that.  There have been a few husbands or wives who have messed around and once you know who they are they seem to stand out in your mind which can make it seem like they are everywhere.  I don't get it either but I know at least one of the families I knew believed in open marriage.  They both agreed that being with someone else while they were separated was ok.  I don't know if they're still together now but it would be interesting to find out.

Answer 2

Wow, I was married to the Navy for 21 years and only met one as you described. I stopped being friends with her when her husband went to Italy and she chose not to go with him. She partied as I'm sure he did and they are still married but cheating on my husband wasn't "my thing" and unless my hubby of 21 years has kept a really good secret I don't think he has either.

Not all Navy Wife's are like that...

Answer 3

I was a Navy wife and I know what you mean. There will be those types at every base you go to. I was young when I got married (18) and I usually ended up making friends with the older wives (26-40) only because they were much more mature and they didn't act stupid. It is a hard place because you feel it isn't fair to the hubby but at the same time don't really know the dynamics of their relationship to know what he is doing too. I had a co-worker that did this. She found a lover so when her hubby went off she went to this other man. They probably have relationship problems behind closed doors.

Answer 4

For that one sweetheart, she should get a job! She has too much time on her hands! As for you, I know you have to live close to wives like these, but, be nice if they say Hi! but don't get involved in their activities! If they want you to go out "prowling" with them, tell them you have something else to do, and for goodness sakes don't let their actions get to you! If you don't have a job, go find a part time one. Just to get away from having to make excuses!! As far as I am concerned, they don't really love their husbands, I feel sorry for the poor guys! God Bless!