Question:

A wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.

by Guest62192  |  earlier

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A wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.

'You disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me - a faithful wife, the mother of your children? I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!'

And Paddy (for it was he) replied, 'Hang on just a minute, love, so at least I can tell you what happened.'

'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed, 'but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And Paddy began - 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for y ou last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight.

The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.

I found the s**y blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't use because someone at work has the same pair.'

Here Paddy took a quick breath and continued - 'She was very grateful for my understanding and help, and as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said,

'Please .... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

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28 ANSWERS


  1. ha ha loved that one *


  2. HAHAhAhAhAhAhAhAh you get a star@!

  3. wow thats funny. have a star.

  4. good one!! starred!

  5. LOL thats funny!!!

  6. I DONT GET IT LOL.

  7. Lmao..

    have a star.*

  8. Very nice!

  9. haaaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaa good joke

  10. Wow< that's so funny hun, and very very creative, did u write that yourself or was it something you rewrote from a magazine or something, either way it was hilarious, and amusing!

  11. Hahahaha.

    lol

    Very funny.

  12. O! thats awesome. the wife got owned

  13. lol thats soo great!! i literally laughed out loud which got me some weird looks. ;)

  14. rofl lol lmao that was funny.

  15. Ahahahahaahahaha..... Pricellesss!!!!!!  

  16. hah! good one

  17. Lol, hilarious.

  18. Lol

  19. Thanks I needed a good laugh, because my common-law husband's leaving the me & my children are loosing the only place that they've called home. I wish I had a week of laughing to take my mind off of this terrible situation that I'm in. Thanks again!!

  20. hahaha

    funny

  21. very cute!!!

  22. DANG....That was really, really funny! I like that!!!

  23. hahahaha that's funny! HA! :) Kinda sad though because there are marriages like that

    :(

  24. Very funny good job!

  25. PMSL that's funny. i like it.

  26. This is killing me, I need to laugh out loud but am at work. Good one.

  27. Haha i get it (h5) great joke

    Have any more ???

    Rach

    x*x

  28. :P

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