ADVICE ON MY REALTIONSHIP PLEASE.. Need help.. =[?

Question

ok.. I have been dating this guy for a year and a month, and i am SO in love with him..

he is in love with me deeply he says also, but..

when we were just talkng, i took my ex boyfriend to dinner, because i felt bad for him, and my boyfriend now considers that cheating on him...

we fight all the time.. well, not to much anymore... but he says he doesnt trust me .. he doesnt get along with most of my family.. but he loves me and i love him...

Should it matter if he never gets over the past? Should it matter if he doesnt like my mother's side of the family and rarely sees any of my family? I have such a big heart so its hard to decide.. should he be the one getting over it? Or should i Just accept that i have to gain his trust back and it doesnt matter what he thinks or what my family thinks about him, as long as both of us are in love?

Please help me, i have been confused for so long..

Answer 1

You must be pretty young.

Relationship Rule #1 - don't have lunch, dinner, emails, phone calls or anything with any ex unless you know it's fine with your new guy - and the VAST majority of the time, it will not be cool.  Even if they do say it's ok, I would recommend not doing it anyway out of respect for your new relationship.

It sounds to me like your relationship with your boyfriend is rocky anyway.  In fact, I'd rather be alone than have a relationship like the one you described.

Hopefully all of this helps you grow, if nothing else.

Good luck.  

Answer 2

Yeah sure...go ahead...marry him.

Who the h**l needs something as inconsequential and bothersome like 'trust' in a relationship anyway?  

Answer 3

You can continue this relationship until the lust wears off but I don't see this as a long term relationship.

Exactly why does your family not like him.

Answer 4

If you don't have trust, you don't have anything.  And you can quote me on that!

He sounds pathetic to call a MEAL with an ex-boyfriend cheating!  

Dump him NOW.  What you've got is NOT love, it's co-dependence and it is horribly destructive, not only to your life in general but to your self-esteem.  

There are far better people out there who won't fight with you all the time and allow you to have interaction with members of the opposite s*x.

Answer 5

Big clue-when everyone around you hates him, there is usually a VERY good reason for that.  Listen to them....you see him with rose-colored glasses, they see him as he truly is.  

Answer 6

If you are both in love (and it sounds like you are, I'd love a girl who talked that way about me) then I think you need to work things out.  You should tell him that your sorry and that you didn't think about the dinner, don't do anythign like it again.  Just tell him it was your mistake.  If you really love him then you won't mind not seeing you ex anymore.  As far as the family, who cares it's your life, love who you want to.  Hope this helps.

Answer 7

Are you happy in spite of him not trusting you? saying you cheated? Are you willing to let go of your family or break your relationship with them? These are big issues and life is way too short to be spent unhappy. You can't live in the past, if you do you are not going to be able to enjoy your "todays" so it's up to you.

Please don't throw away things important in your life for someone who is putting conditions on his love for you. Think about it.

I wish you the best. Look out for #1!

Answer 8

I wouldn't have a relationship with a woman that eats meals with her ex.