Question:

ADVISE FOR NEW MOMMY... ?

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im 11 weeks pregnant and im 19 my mother is extremely dissapointed at me and refuses speak to me.

im so nervous but so excited about becoming a mom. but i have no one to help me or answer my questions so i have a few questions...

1.what is it like to see/hold you baby for the first time??

2. did you ever feel like you werent good enough for you baby?

3.on average, how many hours of sleep did you get for the first few months? lol

4. whats is the best part about being a mom?

and what is the hardest part?

any advise or tips you could give me would be very much appreciated!!!

thanks!!

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12 ANSWERS


  1. I'm sorry you mom is upset with you she should come around,

    Having a baby changes your life it doesn't end it. =)

    1. Holding your child for the first time, for me I was very happy to see her healthy and screaming her lungs out, and happy the delivery was over. Its hard work. lol

    2. Feeling your not good enough I think is natural.  But just remember no one can love your child more then you, not after carrying him/her within you for 9/10 months.

    3. Say bye bye to sleep. =)   But seriously, dont expect to sleep for 8hrs straight for a long time.  I couldnt really give you an actual amount of sleep to expect, depends on your child. Try sleeping when the baby does.

    4.  Best part for me, knowing I'm doing the best I can for a little life.  Corny but pretty much what it comes down to for me.

    Tips

    Take your Prenatal Vitamins especially Folic Acid it helps prevent birth defects.

    Also, trust your instinct on how to take care of your baby, be open to others advice but if it seems wrong to you, it probable is wrong.

    Hope this helps a bit, ask your mom for help too.

    Her angry I'm sure is temporary, its probable more fear for you then anger.


  2. first of all congradulations and sry tht ur moms pissed honestly tho once she holds her grandchild for the first time shell be as happy as u will be   1. to see ur baby for the first time is the best feeling ever especially after all tht u go thru to get the baby out but its so worth it to watch them grow up 2. i never felt like i wasnt good enough for my baby and u shouldnt either if ur ever struggling and ur kids are anything like mine than theyll be thr next to u with a tissue because they are so grateful to have a mother like u 3. for the first few months i got around 4 and a half hours of sleep mostly because i work during the night so when i got home my husband had everything under control suprise suprise and he would go to get him most of the time again mostly cuz i wouldnt roll out of bed  4. the best  part about being a mom is watching ur kids grow up but thts also the hardest part  good luck

  3. 1.  When you first see your baby it is love at first sight.  You call madly in love with this little person you just laid eyes on.

    2.  As a mother you always want what is best and to provide better for your child.  I would not say I did not feel good enough though.

    3.  The first few weeks were rough with my first baby.  Once she got on a good routine things got better.

    4.  The best part of being a mom is watching your baby sleep, do new things, etc.  The hardest is having to leave them when you want nothing more than to be with them and knowing that you are fully responsible for this little life.  Then the fits when they get bigger.  LOL

  4. 1.  At first you are so happy and scared at the same time.Or you might not want to hold the baby at first because you are tired and still in pain.

    2.  I always feel like that. I look at my children and think they could have it so much better, but then I think they could have it so bad too. Just remember to always tell them how much you love them and that they are always wanted.

    3.  The first few days you and the baby can sleep for a long time. After the baby gets a little older you will be waking up every hour or two. Remember to get a baby swing and a rocking chair. this will help with putting baby to sleep. Also if you have someone to help you with the baby that will help too.

    4.  The best part is when they are

    baby's and you see them learning how to smile, laugh, walk and talk. When you see them grow up you always look back and wonder what happened to the time. I would have to say the hardest part is when they get sick. You want it to go away so bad because you hate to see them like that.

    5.  And Finlay my mom was the same too. she was very disappointed in me too. I think you need to give her a little space and let her know that you need her when she is ready to be needed. There is nothing you can say to a person to change their minds when it comes to wrong. Good luck and I hope you take everything I said with a open mind.

  5. hi, i was 18 when i had my first baby, and to hold her for the first time was just so amazing. i was a young mother and i must tell you that its hard work, but worth it, and you dont get much sleep! there were times when i felt i was not good enough for my baby, and i suffered depression too but i always put my baby first, and thats what you must do for the rest of your life now. put the baby first before your own needs. thats the hard part but it will just come natually after a while. also money can be a big problem too! my advise to you is live within your means as i got in trouble with debt collecters and that just adds to your worries, and dont be too proud to accept 2nd hand baby stuff, some people are really generous. enjoy your baby as much as you can, and take lots of pics cos they dont stay babies for long! also, if you feel you may be depressed, get help straight away. the best thing about being a mum is the unconditional love, and watching your child reach milestones and growing and laughing, playing and learning to walk, talk, and learning right from wrong, going to school and making friends and always knowing that you did it, you made your child and that they are happy and healthy. congratulations and i hope you are very happy with your baby and tell your mum that she is being very childish and ask her where your unconditional love is. i didnt have much support either so i know how you feel.

  6. Congratulations! I was 17 when i fell pregnant, 18 when i was 2 months pregnant and now coming up to 19 in september and my son is 4 months next week! My mum was disappointed at first but soon got over it and now she is a proud nanny. If your mum doesn't get round to the idea then I'm so sorry, she should stick by you no matter what. Would your bfs mum help out and be there for you?

    1. Holding your baby for the first time is amazing, you wont feel as much love for anyone like you will your baby, you bond with your baby through the pregnancy with all of the kicks etc and the pain of labour is all worth it

    2. Yes i did feel like i wasn't good enough within the first 2 weeks of having him and i still do now and again, when he cries and i have done everything it really gets me down and makes me think that i am a bad mum and that i have failed him

    3. Well my baby was brilliant for sleeping, when he was first born and for the first week he woke up at 2am then 6am every morning but after the first week he slept from 9pm until 6am then when he was about 2 months old, he slept from 8 or 9pm until whenever i wake him up in the morning which could be anything up until 12 midday lol so i get really good sleep too

    4. Well the best part so far as he is only 4 months (next week) is when he first smiled and giggled and cooed! its so sweet, the hardest part so far is those first 2 weeks and didn't know what to expect and when he wouldn't stop crying

    Erm tips, just think positive about everything, enjoy every minute of the pregnancy and when your baby is born, don't ever let anyone put you down!

    GOOD LUCK!!! You will be amazing honestly, it all comes naturally.

  7. Congratulations on your pregnancy!

    Okay let's see...

    1. Scary, dizzy making, amazing, intoxicating, fantastic, all at once! You go through all this pain then you get to hold this tiny being, something you created and carried and brought into the world. It's amazing!

    2. I have 3 kids, the eldest is almost 12 and i still have days where I feel like a failure! I think its part and parcel to being a parent unfortunately!

    3. Sleep? Sorry, what's that? lol it's not so much the lack of sleep when your baby is small, it's the broken sleep. You can go to bed at 9pm and stay in bed until 7am but you will be up 5/6/7 times a night so you often don't get more than 2 hours in one go. I found that far harder as you don't settle off properly. Mind you i'm a walking zombie today as my youngest decided to get up at 6:30am... Lovely.

    4. The best parts and the hardest parts mix in together-seeing your child walk for the first time is amazing because, well, it is but it's also hard because it's one step that they are taking towards being all grown up! Staying calm and focused is hard, if not impossible. Sometimes you just need to scream to get the frustration out (I did it the other day, stood in the middle of the living rom and just screamed really loud, felt great lol!).

    Just remember that it does get easier-when you're there, feeding your baby for the 5th time that night and you haven't had any decent sleep for weeks, that it does end. You won't be getting up to feed a baby when they're 5 or 6 yers old. If you ever feel at the end of your tether and your baby won't stop crying, put him/her down somewhere safe and leave the room for 10 minutes. It won't do your baby any harm to cry a bit-and if it means you have a chance to catch yourself and calm down before you lose your temper then it's a good thing! If anybody offers to help you with the baby, take the chance-but not for them to take the baby out. Get them washing your dishes, whizzing around with the vaccuum or doing some ironing and take the chance to sit and cuddle your child.

    Good luck and congratulations.

  8. ANSWERS:

    1) iT iS THE MOST GREATEST FEELiNG IN THE WORLD...

    2) YES i DiD ALL THE TiME.....BUT i DO EVERYTHiNG  POSSiBLE TO GET ALL THAT SHE NEEDS & MORE..

    3) UM...NOT MANY...BUT STiLL FELT GREAT....LOL

    4) THE BEST PART iS ACTUALLY LOViNG THEM..AND RAiSiNG THEM....DOiNG EVERYTHiNG WiTH THEM...

    THE HARDEST PART...THE FRUSTRATiON.....BUT TO SEE THEiR FACE..MAKES YOU LOVE THEM EVEN MORE...

    YOUR MOTHER MAY BE DiSAPPOiNTED iN YOU RiGHT NOW...BUT SHE WiLL COME AROUND...i AM ALSO A 19 YEAR OLD MOTHER...AND MY PARENTS WERE ALSO DiSAPPOiNTED iN ME...THEY WANTED ME TO DO MORE THiNGS WiTH MY LiFE BEFORE i HAD KiDS...BUT AS i GOT FURTHER ALONG iN MY PREGNANCY THEY REALiZED iT WASNT MY BABiES FAULT....AND NOW THEY LOVE MY DAUGHTER AND ME..AND MY HUSBAND....SO iT ALL WORKED OUT....

    CONGRATS.....HOPE THiS HELPS

  9. first off congrats.

    Second, don't worry your mom will come around, she just wants to prove her point that she is disappointed.

    to answer your questions... (in my opinion of course... remember every one is different)

    1. To see my baby, took all the pain away, seeing my son for the first time was overwhelming... how did he form inside me?!?! to hold him came so naturally, never did i feel nervous it was just normal.

    2. I never felt not good enough, i knew that i was and will do the best that i can.

    3. I breast fed my baby so I woke up everytime he did so solid about 4 hours but it was easy to nap when he did.

    4. the best part is watching the baby develop!!! learning the cries came easy and it was always funny how people were blown away by that.

    The hardest part is when you cant figure out the cry or they are just uncomfortable and you dont know cuz they cant talk

    Advise:

    ~feed on demand, a schedule will probably be your biggest headache.

    ~Try to breastfeed. not only is it better for baby but you can save a ton of money

    ~enjoy your quiet time now.

    ~ when baby wont sleep in the crib tuck in your shirt, right off your back so it smells like you, under the nose so you trick baby into thinking they are next to you.

    Lastly enjoy your pregnancy, dont let too may things get under your nails and you will have a happy baby (old wives tale)

  10. Hello, i'm also a young mom, just a bit younger than you! My son is only 13 days old!

    1. The first thought when i saw him was, wow was he really inside on me?

    and when i first held him, i was holding him as if he were a cracked egg, i didnt wanna break him!

    2. I feel like im not good enough for him ALL the time. He is just so perfect i cant explain what i feel for him!

    3. Well, since i just had him i can tell you for the first few weeks dont expect to get a lot. Some nights if your lucky you'll get 5 in total, some nights you'll get 2. I got about 2 hours of sleep last night and over the weekend i slept throughout the day when he was sleeping and got a total of 7 hours!

    4. The best part i think about being a mom is in his eyes, im perfect!

    The hardest part is hearing him cry!

    The best advise i can give is to follow your heart, as long as it feels right!

    GOOD LUCK!!

  11. Firstly, congratulations :)

    Im sure your mum will come around, my friend dealt with exactly the same reaction from her mother (despite her being 27 when she feel pregnant! lol) but she soon came around once the baby arrived, and is now a doting grandmother!

    There is nothing that compares to seeing your baby for the first time, it is a truly magical, indescribable moment. Encourage your partner to be there at the birth as well, having my husband there, and seeing his tears of joymade it all the more special. He wouldn't have missed that moment for the world!

    Honestly, the first week was tough for me. I struggled to get breastfeeding right as I hadnt done my research beforehand, and I felt like a failure for not being able to feed my own child. I also didnt bond with her properly at first, it wasnt until I sought professional help with breastfeeding and was able to do it that I felt much happier and my bonding really began with my daughter. I am still breastfeeding 15 months later, and the decision to persevere was the best I ever made, I thoroughly recommend it!

    Sleep is minimal at first, you really need to sleep when your baby sleeps, and catch it when you can. My daughter still doesnt sleep right through the night actually, and I havent had an undisturbed nights sleep for 2 years!

    The best part about being a mum is being so proud- I am proud of everything she does, I am proud to breastfeed, I am proud that she is mine- and there is nothing better than when she reaches out for me, or gives me kisses :)

    The hardest part was getting breastfeeding right. It took 6 weeks for the pain to stop as I didnt have the latch right, and I cried everyday. It was the hardest few weeks of my life, but looking back I wouldnt have changed them for anything!

    My top bits of advice are to get yourself a good baby carrier- carried babies cry less as a baby is happiest next to mummy :) and you will still have your hands free to go about your business! Also, dont fret about getting your baby into a 'routine'- just go with the flow, follow your babies lead- you will all be much happier for it! Dont listen to the 'experts', you are mum, you know best- you have everything you need to be a great mum, just follow your instincts and you cant go wrong!

    Good luck x

  12. Congrats on becoming a mom - Don't worry, your mom will come around, it might take her some time to get used to the idea that her baby is having a baby.  Try to include her as much as possible in your pregnancy.  Try taking her with you to your check ups and any scans you might have scheduled.

    1.  It was magic, you have been carrying this bundle of joy for 9 months, in a way you know him/her and now you are just putting a face to all the emotions youn had for 9 months. - you must talk to your baby everyday so that your bonding starts well before they are born If you talk they will recognised your voice immediately and stop crying in the delivery room.

    2.  Yes, plenty of times and then they stop crying and look at you with such love, that you throw that thought right out the window.

    3.  Normal - During the day whenever baby slept and I felt tired I slept with her, so I was not very sleep deprived.  You should try this as well.  I did household chores (washing, cooking etc) in the evenings when my husband got home and he was able to watch her/play with her.  Sleep will also depend on how often your little gets up at night.

    4.  The best part - I'm their angel watching over therm& I get to play with them and watch them grow into little beings.

    The worst part - Letting go

    Enjoy your pregnancy - Also try listening to classicial music it helps in brain development. And eat healthy foods.

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