Abandoned children and what they feel like the rest of there lives what do you think?

Question

Well being abandoned bye my father at birth.

I could not understand of corse tell I got of age to understand life, life it self was one i first had to come to grips with be fore i could dig in to what was a lost piece of my life.

It's hard understanding why even at my age why a person could some how think it's ok to make a baby then leave it.

I could'nt in my wright mind imagine the thought it sickens me how young people are so quick to have kids it's such a great responcablity to bring achild in to a world that has so many proplems of it's own. I felt lost for so,so many years and at times still do how doe's one throw away the pain that easy?

I have a small dog not to match it up to a person but even that I can not see my self lacking on my responablity to him. Having to think about these thing all my life has made me a strong but some times weak person weak meaning feeling pain in my heart for all them kids out there with out there mom or dad.

Answer 1

I'm sorry for what you've been through. (((hugs)))

I have never understood how someone could abandon a child...it breaks my heart!

My hubby, who is 39 now, just found his dad a couple years ago. Up until then, he hadn't even seen a picture. As far as his mom, she abandoned him for 2 years when he was a baby.

Today, he never hears from his dad anymore and his mother very seldom.

Surprisingly, he's turned out to be a very loving person and a great dad. I've asked him how he does it, because I know I wouldn't be that strong. He said he just accepts things for what they are and he knows he has our love and that's enough for him. He can't change the past, so he just lives in the present.

Answer 2

So sad...

But keep in mind in some poor countries abandoning their children is normal, like every country that makes up eastern Europe. Children literally carpet the streets during the day and at night they sleep in abandoned buildings and sewers. Neither the father or the mother want them.

Even in rich countries like South Korea. the women abandon their babies simply because they want to have fun and party a little longer. Often they just sneak away from their family and boyfriend to give birth and come back.

You are not alone.

In America 76% of all marriages end up in divorce. A rich country where people enjoy more luxury then anywhere in the world. Most mothers here are single mothers. But at least unlike Korean women, American women do what ever they can to hold on to their babies, even if it means dropping out of school and giving up all fun. I noticed a lot of hispanic women are also like this. If only we had good men in this country. My father didn't abandon us, but as far as a father goes he is terrible. And he did abandon two other families from previous marriages. Thats another thing, men in America get married so many times. Don't they have any feelings for their children?

Answer 3

As I read your question, I felt your intensity.  You are amazingly right on and tap into a great societal problem - people not taking responsibility.  

There is a lack of emotional nurturing inherent to a capitalistic society, such as we are.  I'll spare the rant.  When it's all about money, so much gets lost.  Many cultures stick together.  Many do not.  Mine does not.  I will carry that pain forever as well.  I have tools to help - gratefully.  I hope u do too.

That pain we carry will enable us to help others and to see many things not seen by the masses.  As you live, you will see this is true.  At least I believe you will.  

I've been diagnosed with  ptsd, and possibly bipolar 2, not the same as bipolar.  It's a by-product of the ptsd.  A series of traumatic events will likely alter the brain chemistry.

It's never okay to make a baby and leave it.  It's also not okay to make a baby and emotionally leave it, though you may be there physically.

Stay in tune.

You can make a difference.

Answer 4

That's really mean... people like that should get put in prison or maybe the death penalty.

It also makes the kid doubt themselves which just sucks.

Answer 5

My biological mom left me with my dad when I was really young, and my dad remarried my "step" mom, tho i use the word "step" loosely...because she is my mom, and although we fight, she is my REAL mom. After my biological mom left and my father married my mom, my dad kind of tunes out.. he is vary rarily ever at home, but it has been like this so long, that my sister (they had her when i was three) and i prefer it to just be us and mom...

Because if my biological mother and our father dont want anything to do with us, then they are not worth the worry...becuase I know that my real mom is there for me and my sister and we don't need anyone that doesnt love us

Answer 6

sometimes it is better to not have that person around.