Abuse in women's shelters?

Question

While going through some old stuff I found an article I had written in college.

One of the local women's shelters that had some shady rumors flying around about it. A friend and I decided a good way for us to advance ourselves on our Universities newspaper staff was to do and investigative report on the shelter and turn it in. Well to make a long story short, we discovered some very frightening things. Many of the women weren't abused but had rather had small fights with their significant others and had come there out of revenge. When told this the staff didn't send the women on their way but instead coached them on how to make bruises and what to say when asked questions. The shelters would often turn away women and children because they were too full(I later found of that many of these women were actual victims of DV and one was even murdered later by her husband) That was just the tip of the iceberg.

Answer 1

Excellent point christine. Glad you bring the ignorance of feminism to light. Dont give hubby hard time over the sweet heart incident. You dont know you have a real man till hes gone.

Answer 2

Not suprised at all really.

Did you see the average income for the women turned away versus the ones that were shown how to fake their injuires?  

When something is crooked, usually a big green monster is what is doing the bending.

Answer 3

I currently work at a women's shelter as an "intake worker" We inquire enough to make sure that it's a real DV victim and not someone who's homeless...

The thing is though abuse can also be verbal, sexual, mental, etc..Physical scars won't show up on these women to serve as "proof."  

But by observing how some of the women act in the shelter, I can tell that they're typical victims of abuse..the way how they talk to their husbands and in-laws saying "I'm so sorry..I know it was my fault to make him mad and he hit me! I'm coming back home, I promise!"

Answer 4

Since I have experience as a victims advocate, I can honestly say that not all of them mock the traits of this one particular shelter. For every one shelter you find that's carrying on in such a manner behind closed doors, you'll find more of them that are not. I do applaud you for taking the time to investigate the guilty, and report them before any further damage is committed.

Like any other system that is put in place to aid the innocent and helpless, there’s always those key players who find loop-holes in the system as a means of exploitation. Now, you can do like all the other disgruntled guys who come in here and blame in all on feminist (h**l, let them tell it feminist are responsible for everything) but feminist are not the issue. The real issues are with those who're untruthful, who abuse the system, and don't have what's best for the real victims in mind.

Please, don't take this as I'm calling you a liar or that I'm verbally attacking you. But I will say that I believe nothing I hear and half of what I see until I can prove it for myself. I wasn't there, I didn't conduct the investigation to confirm your allegations, and I personally didn't hear of this, so I have no basis to form my own conclusions. But if your story is true, I do hope that the light you and your friend shed on this shady shelter will assist law enforcement and government officials with ensuring this does not happen again. There is nothing worst then hearing of innocent lives being lost when it could have been prevented.

Just remember that when you publish articles on such sensitive information, it hits a sore spot with most who read. I watched many women (family and friends) be abused at the hands of their loved ones, and they endured the abuse because they where too afraid to seek aid from the local shelters (a friends cousin passed away at the hands of her husband). So when I see stuff like this posted here it puts me on the defense. Because it leads me to believe that you're attacking the women’s shelters that do assist those in need. And you may not be, but I'm very curious to know (for my own personal reasoning) what lead you to come here and post that? When you know this is the breeding ground for trolls who support abuse against women. What made you post this?

Answer 5

I've read of a few stories like this, but I didn't know it was this rampant.  I wish I could say otherwise, but I'm really not surprised to tell the truth.  It's sick.

Answer 6

Maybe a woman should go in the shelter under cover and say it was just an argument, and if they start coaching her on how to make bruises etc.. They get arrested. That for sure, should be illegal.

Answer 7

Bad apples....It makes me sick.

Answer 8

Wow, I had no clue about anything like this.  When I read your title I thought it was abuse of the women, not the abuse of ethics and illegality.  This really opened my eyes.

Answer 9

What's worse, is when I was working as a nurse, I FREQUENTLY heard attorneys and their staff coach victims of domestic violence in the same kinds of "alter the evidence" behaviors.  Actually gave people instructions for how to fake this or that.  In Workman's Comp nursing (getting people back to work after injuries), I found an entire industry of faking aliments, signs and symptoms for the purpose of abusing the Workman's Comp system.  Americans, mostly males, are really into that scam.  It's an unethical behavior, faking an illness or injury for financial profit.  But, the behavior of faking domestic abuse is not about financial profit.  When it happens it's usually about some misguided vigilante agenda to eek out justice in an environment that traditionally had all the cards stacked against women.  Women who are abused are damaged not only physically but emotionally.  They can get pretty twisted up and full of revenge enough to fight back like animals, especially if the abuse began in her childhood.  That's still no excuse whatsoever for faking abuse.  Above all else, women need to rise above their hate and use the legal system properly.

Many women AND men who work in domestic violence see SO much unfairness for the victims, even in the courts, especially back when police still treated domestic violence of women as a "non-crime".  They go "vigilante".  Desparate times requires desparate measures, is what happens to people who work too long in domestic violence.  It was getting a little better before the Bush administration and all the ransacking of the funding for domestic socially stabilizing programs in the U.S.  As a nurse, I choose to never cross that line.  And, I'm awfully glad I made that decision.  Because any corruption of the facts corrupts the entire big picture.  And, without a clear picture, we can't untangle this mess of domestic violence.