Acting like a gentleman is sexist?

Question

You always see how guys open doors for girls, and do other things for them. But am I the only one that sees that as sexist? It portrays women in a way that they can’t open the doors themselves. Don't get me wrong I open the door for anyone male or female just to be nice, but it seems that the code of conduct when being a gentleman for a lady seems sexist. What do you think? Can guys just open a door for everyone?

Answer 1

i think its super s**y when a guy is a gentlemen. i adore it. it makes me fell like they are thinking of me even when they don't have to. i love love love love it how my boyfriend always opens the door for me and pulls out my chair, he's just a gentlemen that's how he was raise. i see where your coming from but girls eat **** like this up. so don't stop.

p.s. i like to open doors for old people. not because they can't but because there so cute that i want to help them :]

Answer 2

I totally agree with your premise. Some women seem to want to have it all - men should give way to them, stand up when there are no available seats, open the door for them, etc., and expect to be treated as equals. I recently had an encounter like this in the airport, standing in line for immigration (and I was in line for the last 45 minutes already, and I was next to be served), this woman mistakenly thinking that I was straight and would be beguiled by her "charms", started to do the "wink, wink" routine and said to me "My, aren't you a gentleman to let me have the spot before you?"

I flat out told her "No, I've been waiting in line for 45 minutes. I don't see anyone else doing what you're doing, trying to con your way into getting ahead. We are all equals here - you need to wait until your turn to be served."

Wackiness ensued after that, she proclaimed loudly about the death of chivalry. At which point, the airport police brought her in for disturbing the peace.

Sometimes, justice does get served in this world.

Answer 3

I think, based on the scenario - it shows respect, courtesy,and excellent manners..

I have been marreid for a "ton" now, and I still open the passenger side of the car door for my wife, and if we are out walking, I make sure she is to the INSIDE of the sidewalk.. Again, out of respect and manners.It was a thing (s) that was taught to us as kids and it carried forth.

It has NOTHING to do with sexism, as this "terminolgy" came into being, long after we were demonstrating proper manners.

There are many women out there today, that are taken back by the gestures we know and hold to be part of our way of thinking, and you can see it in their eyes, that WOW - this is a very nice thing he did for me..

It  doesn't take much effort - just a lot of thought and again respect..!!

If you don't have respect for the feminine gender, what do you have respect for...? Yourself only...?

Regards,

Rachelle In High Heels... P.S. I am a c/d - t/v  and I have the greatest respect and admiration for women...

Answer 4

i see it as sexist too it really annoys me when people do that kinda stuff for me

Answer 5

It can definitely be taken as sexist. No question. But it doesn't have to be sexist, necessarily. Do those guys that hold the door for women, only hold the door for women? Then most probably sexist. Are they holding the door for a woman they know, who likes them to do that? Then no. In that case, it would be like saying "calling me on my birthday, because you know I like that, is a horrible thing to do."

It does tend to stem from a time when men looked at women as helpless, and unable to pay for themselves or do for themselves. Which is why it can be seen that way. But in my opinion, it's all about context.

Answer 6

In my opinion, chivalry is sexist. But, common courtesy towards both men and women is good. If a guy opens the door for me, cool. But if he always insists on it and gets angry if it goes the other way, then not cool. I love polite people, not chivarious people. Most people these days are polite not chivarious.  

Answer 7

It's either sexist or you're just lazy.

Answer 8

I open doors for both men and women.  A true gentleman would do that.

Answer 9

I think it's more of a courtesy thing..."She is physically able open the door, but it would be rude not to open it for her" seems to be the theme.

I'm a girl but I open doors for everyone too.  

Answer 10

i think that when guys open doors for girls its a very sweet and polite thing to do, and if the Ladies have no problem with it then i dont think the men should.

you just think to much! lol  

Answer 11

You have the complete wrong idea, being a gentleman, being a dandy, is based on the thought that women were repressed and we should treat them better nowadays. There is no sexism about that.

Answer 12

tru dat

Answer 13

It would only be sexist if the gentleman uttered some leering comment as the lady passed through the doorway.

Door-holding has become much more about politeness and benevolence.  I'm a man and hold the door for both genders, and I've had plenty of women hold the door for me.

Basically, courtesy dictates that anyone reaching the door first should hold it for anyone who is less than, say, ten seconds away.

Answer 14

yeah, it's a little old school, but I like oldschool...don't get me wrong the new school's good too. I don't know quite yet, if I'd call it sexist, I think it's polite...I think when a man has to drive, or take a handle on things a woman can do it might be sexist...I mean if they insist. I really don't mind if a man holds the door for me. I'll hold a door for a man, child, baby, or woman. haha.

EDIT: But I do mind if I walk up to a group of guys and there's this one guy who sais, "okay fellas tone down the language, there's a lady in our presence." and I'm like "***** what?!" I will kick your pansy **** faced ************* *** you piece of **** sexist and **** your mom too, I hate that *****! Burn in h**l and kiss my fat ************* *** you a*****e! haha. just kidding. But that would be most excellent. But really, I am definitely capable of talking like a sailor.

Answer 15

1st, to totally deny that there is no difference between the sexes is worse than being sexist.  

2nd, my understanding of sexism is that it is exploitation; keeping women from being able to participate in events simply because of gender is frankly wrong, and is in my opinion the true definition of sexism.  

Opening the door for a person is a courtesy as you state, and it is a practice that I, myself, am fond of ... yet ...

3. Being a gentleman in order to gain favor of the oposite s*x would be exploitation, therefore sexist in the worst form ... and not at all gentlemanly.

4. Being a gentleman in its truest sense is to be a VOLUNTARY SERVANT witout expecting anything in return regardless of race, creed, or gender.  Perhaps I'm old fashioned and altruistic, but I believe that true gentlemen exist even still.  How can that be wrong?

So, to apply the term sexist with all of its negative connotation to acting as a gentleman traditionally has would be just as wrong since it is NOT exploitation.  The trick is to be able to discern the gentleman from the snake dressed as a gentleman.

Answer 16

ya