Adopted at 10 months, looking for birth mother...?

Question

I was born 12-14-1984. I am looking for my birth parents. If you contact me be ready to provide some sort of imformation so that I know it's for real. Thanks everyone!

Answer 1

it might help if you included your name, place of birth, where you live. but that might draw unwanted attention too. sorry.

Answer 2

As someone adopted, I have to tell you it will be hard if it was a closed adoption. This means all my information from my birth until my parents got me is pretty much kept secret. I know it sounds bad, but that's because it is. The hospital I was born at told me they have no record of me being born. This is mainly because I was born with a different name, and I don't know what name my birthmother may have given me or what her last name was. If they search under the name I have now, it won't be found. I have very little information on my birthparents. It makes me angry and sad at the same time that they took this crucial information away from me. The first thing you probably want to do is find out if they have a state adoption registry where you live and put his name on it. The next thing is to go to the adoption agency and apply to get all non-identifying information they can give you on the birthfamily. Mine was okay, but not compared to others. It will tel you basically height, ages, weight, talents, siblings or the birthparents and a little more if they have it. They will even tell you if the family has been looking for him. If it's been a month and you have no match on the registry and the non-identifying info is not good, I'd look into getting a seach angel. Search angels are people that help those involved in adoption find the family member. They are free of charge. Many of them are involved in adoption themselves and some are not. I am still searching for any bit of information to lead me to anyone in my past. Well, I hope all of this helps. I wish you luck. I know how tough it can be. I just pray that I can have my own family like lots of kids one day to make up for the hereditary part of me that I lost through adoption. Very few states allow adopted children their records once they turn 18. People are still fighting to give the rest of us that right.  As a matter of fact the state of Maine just issued that right to adoptee today I believe.  Now there are 6 states that allow it.

PS

If it was a closed adoption, you probably will not get the adoption agency to give you any names.

Answer 3

You're probably going to need more info than this..like a hospital or a city and state of birth.

Answer 4

How would someone know if they are your birth parent from only knowing your birthday?

Answer 5

If you can see your adoption papers, you will have a place to start looking.  They may have the name of your birth mother and the place you were born, or at least from where you were adopted.  Then you have to go there and ask.  If you have a birth certificate, even if it has the name of your adoptive parents, the place of birth listed is probably correct, and you can go to the county court house where you were born and ask them how to proceed.  You need to find her name, then you can do a people search on the internet .  You can also look through birth and marriage records in the county where you were born.  When I found my birthmother, she was already dead, but I found her grave, took flowers, and thanked her for giving me life.  Good luck and be careful; it made the woman who raised me really crazy that I considered anyone but her my "real" mother.

Answer 6

Find the adoption registry for Indianapolis.  Indiana is one of the states that allows parents who put children up for adoption to register and keep their address up to date.  Start with the hospital and county where you were born.  Ask questions of your adoptive family.  If your parents aren't still alive, go with other relatives of theirs.  You may find more information that way.  

I am a woman who put a girl up for adoption, not you, and her parents have stayed in contact with my parents and now that she is 17, we email each other often.  I had a private adoption.  You could also check with the lawyer involved in your adoption.  If that person doesn't give you information, they may get in touch with your birth parents and let them know you are looking for them.  

If the parents who raised you are still alive, make sure you give them extra hugs while you search for your birth parents.  No matter how old you are, it still hurts to see you looking for a "parent".  I am a woman who raised 3 step children from very young ages.  When they see their real mom, it hurts when we leave and they cling to her.  I have told my hubby to let me stay at the hotel when they all go to say goodbye.  It is good for them to cling to her but it still hurts my heart.

Good luck!

Answer 7

Good luck on your quest. It is a long process usually. My best friend finally found her birth mother after 25+ years. Have you tried looking at the hospital birth records in that area?

Answer 8

There is some really good advise above.  Try researching your surname in the obituary of some Indiana newspapers.  Your last name could be that of your biological father.   Also, check the court records of Indiana.  Check this website:  http://bastardnation.org   they are against closed adoptions and may have other resources.  Also, check out http://donorsiblingregistry.com  for advise on how to approach your birthparents when you find them.  Best advise is to seek only their health information for your future reference.