Adopted child is 17,does it make sense to send his parents...?

Question

...A welcome Hello letter,with notes from both Bparents & recent photos in it. ~ The adoption was done slightly iilegal back in '91 with no angegcy invovled, we know were they are located...opions please ???? Thank you.

Answer 1

Hi Dave,

By all means write to the adoptive parents.  Take a chance and see where it goes.  The worst they can do is say no.  Then in less than a year you can contact your wife's son directly.  Really, I don't think you have anything to lose by sending a polite note expressing interest in meeting birth son.  The adoptive parents might surprise you and welcome the visit.  I'll be thinking of you.  Best of luck:)

Answer 2

"Slightly illegal" is like being a little bit pregnant.

If they willingly allowed themselves to be involved in an illegal adoption can you trust that they will even tell the child if you make contact?

Answer 3

the child is whats important. the thing that bothers me here is what do you mean "slightly illegal" .  I'm sorry but adding that word in makes me think both natural parents and Aparents should be locked up. Really people what are you trying to do this child? you know not my place not my problem. situations like this are what divine justice are for. best of luck

Answer 4

i wouldnt .....it mite cause some trouble i know how you feel but i think its better to leave it

Answer 5

you shud thnk bout da child, i mean it was probably hard for him to accept the fcat his birth parents arent in the picture and to dump his parents on him after he probably accepted the fact he was adopted can affect him very much. i would wait till he's 18 and make him understand that if he wants to contact his birth parents, he can/

Answer 6

Well, I would contact the adoptive parents first to see how much this child knows about his adoption and if he is even open to wanting contact.

I wouldn't just drop a bomb on him and perhaps ruin any potential relationship between the adopted child and birth parents.

Answer 7

Since your son is not an adult, you should send a letter to the aparents. This way if the child doesn't know he's adopted then the aparents have the oppurtunity to tell you and or him. I think a nice letter and a picture from each of you would be nice.

Answer 8

Sorry...but what do you mean by "A welcome Hello" letter? and why do you want to get in contact with them?