Adoptees: Did your family have pictures of your natural family up on walls with other family pictures?

Question

Did you like this; did you not like this? Any concerns with doing so?

Answer 1

No, but I like the idea of it. If the adoption is open.

Answer 2

I do have pictures of my daughter's biological family up on the walls.  Her mother and father, an aunt and her siblings.

We place them in  her room on her walls.  We feel as she grows that these pictures belong to her and not just anyone who visits our home.   So we decided to keep them up on the walls in her room, along with pictures of her adopted family.  That way she can be surrounded by her entire family in her own space.  

But we also don't want her to feel they are pictures to be hidden away or ashamed of.  We talk about who is in the pictures and go through her picture book that contains photos of her biological family whenever she wants to.

So we wanted to display them, but yet still let her have privacy with those pictures.  So we felt that putting them up in her room was the best choice.

Answer 3

As long as your family has other pictures on the wall it may be a nice thing.  Maybe your son can select the place to hang it up.

Answer 4

No, my adoption was closed.

Even if the Adoption is open, I don't think I would do that. I would probably put their (the Natural families) pictures in like a baby book or something but, the natural family is NOT the childs family. That is the purpose of adoption, to give that child a new family. At least that is my opinion on the matter.

Answer 5

I am an adult and I don't have any single pictures of my bmom. I do have a picture of my bmom with my family (including my parents). Interestingly, my mom has a picture of my bmom displayed at her house (they have become good friends since we were reunited with my bmom). It certainly doesn't bother me, as she is now a member of our family.

Answer 6

Considering we have no idea who they are that would be kinda hard to do...the only picture I have from before I was adopted was from the orphanage & that is in an album.

Personally, if an adoptee has a picture of their natural family  it should be their choice whether or not they wanted it on display for all to see of they wanted to keep it some what private for their own eyes.

Answer 7

Your question made me look around my livingroom for a minute. There's pictures of loved ones all over.

Mostly of my children of course, but there's lots of other family too. One of my bmom right her at my desk, one of my bsister above my tv, one of my abrother sitting on santa's knee with his girlfriend and another of my abrother after running in a marathon a few years back.

I display the pictures of those I love in my home. I have two families as far as I'm concerned. My abrother knows and accepts that, as does my birth family. Neither my abrother or birth family feel like they have to compete for my love, and I like it that way.

Answer 8

My adoptive parents never did that, but I had a photo of my bio parents and I did put it up for a bit on my wall when I was younger. My adoptive parents never seemed to mind, or if they did, they never said anything.

Now I'm in reunion and I've now got pictures of people from both families around my room. My a-parents respect that. I don't think they mind because they always make positive comments about the photos, which is cool.

As far as I'm concerned, I've got 2 families, both of whom are important to me. My adoptive family respect and accept that, which means a lot to me.

I personally think its a great idea, but as someone else pointed out, some adoptees might not like it. If your son's old enough to tell you how he feels about it, then ask him. If he's too young, go with your own instincts until he's older. If he doesn't want it up, then he can take it down or vice versa.

Answer 9

No not at all. I dont agree with that at all. If it was an open adoption, then fair enough, but not a closed adoption. Dont you think its better that the child gets to make its own descisions about wanting to meet bio family without having it stuffed in their faces?

Its not really upto the adoptive parent to be pushy about the adoptee knowing what the bio parents look like. Yeah be encourageing, offer support, but never push it onto the adoptee.

Answer 10

I don't think there are many (if any) adoptees of age who can answer that question.

My adoption was nailed shut tightly.  I didn't meet my mother until I was 21.

Answer 11

No I did not; close adoption. That said my family was never really a big picture family in regards to displaying them on walls. So even had I had an very open adoption a few pictures would probably  just be in an album and looked at once in a while.

My Aunt does have picture of my cousins Natural mother/father and brother, though she just has them in an album.

Answer 12

I do not have any pictures of my adopted son's original family hanging on the walls, but I also do not have pictures of my ex-husband on the walls for my two oldest kids either.