Adoptees: How about you give a list of things you feel are insults to you?

Question

It seems that a lot of adoptees get offended here by statements that wouldn't offend non-adoptees. I've encountered this myself as I'm not an adoptee & have no idea what an adoptee would consider offensive. Maybe a list of things that adoptees may take as insult should be given so it can be prevented in the future. I myself would like to know so I can refrain from using a certain word or statement. Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

I'm not adopted but I know the one thing that irks both my adopted sister and my adopted child are to have their siblings (bio children) referred to as "real children", as if they are imaginary instead of adopted.  My sister also gets very offended if some one asks about her "real" mother.  She informs them that her biological mother is not her REAL mother at all.

Answer 2

PAPs who have avatars that proclaim "BABY DUST WANTED" and names that include the 'trying to conceive' handle.

ETA: "My DH and I have spent all our money on infertility treatments, so now we need to have a fundraiser!  Any ideas? When do we get that tax credit?  The wait is so long for a baby!!!!! Why does it take so long, and why does it cost SO much? We can offer a NEEDY child a LOVING home!  If you know of a BIRTHMOTHER, please have her e-mail us at [e-mail].  We've waited 6 long years, and we're ready for our baby NOW!!!!!"

Thanks, that felt good!!!