Adoptees: would you ever adopt a child?

Question

Why or why not?

Answer 1

Maybe a foster child down the road.  But a BABY??? Oh lord no!  Been there done that three times.  I will happily wait till the far off day (I hope very far off) for grandkids.

If your question was would I have adopted when I was younger (if I could not have kids) then "yes"  I would have had no problem considering infant adoption.

Answer 2

Yes. I would definitely adopt a child. I think everyone should consider such a question. Of course I mean by that , people with the capability to love a child. I would LOVE to.

Answer 3

Yes, I hope and intend to adopt, probably internationally, within the next couple of years. I have the support and encouragement of my spouse, my parents, and my bmom, which is great. I don't want an infant - as someone said, been there done that, but perhaps a toddler.

I want to do so because I had a great experience growing up and I would love to share our home with another child. My husband actually wanted to adopt first, or maybe instead of having a bio child, but that's not how it worked out. Also, it make me sad to know that there are millions of kids in the world who don't have a mom or dad who can care for them.

Answer 4

I would really like to foster children - and hope that they could be reunited with their bio family - act as a relative - of sorts - to care and love - but not to replace the family they already belong to.

If that meant - in the long term - that some child had no family to return to - perhaps yes. But I would perhaps do a legal guardianship situation - as I wouldn't want to delete the child's past. If the child - when older - wanted more - I would only move forward with the child's permission (ie adding my surname).

For now - I have 3 bio daughters - who take up most of my time - but later - when they've done the bulk of their growing - I'd look into foster care.

Answer 5

I am adopted and I did adopt 2 children- they are 16 and 19 now

Answer 6

I'm not sure. I would (and have) taken in foster children & I would do that again in a heartbeat with no second thoughts. But I think it's more essential for a child to bear his/her own last name, and to have at least some of the small pieces of who they are that I feel get stripped away with adoption.

I guess I'd rather have guardianship over adoption

Answer 7

Yes! I don't think it really matters if your mother is your genetic mother or not, if whoever raised you loves and supports you and can take care of you, than you have a family. I'd be more than happy to give another child a home.

Answer 8

There was a period of time (twenty years ago) when I thought I might adopt a child.  I think I was scared of what I might pass along to my child.  I had no idea where I came from.  I had no idea what my medical history was.  Adopting a child felt less cruel than bringing one of my own into the world.  And I figured I might be more helpful to an adopted child than my parents could be to me.  I would have first hand experience of the pitfalls, and I thought maybe I could be helpful.

At some point, that shifted.  I wanted my own child.  I didn't want an adopted child.  I wanted a child that gave me some connection to humanity.  I wanted to see myself in another human being.  I wanted to know a blood relative, and I figured I would never meet my parents, so the only option was to have my own child.

Then it shifted again.  I decided not to have children.  (In part because my partner is childfree.  But I wouldn't have stayed with her if I felt strongly about having children.)  But even if I were to have children, I could never adopt now.  It's too painful.  I couldn't do it.

Answer 9

My husband was adopted, loved his life and HE was the first to bring up adoption to me. He'd love to give a child (probably from cps or a foster home) a good home and reciprocate the love he was given.

Answer 10

Yes as I’ve mentioned a few times before if able I will adopt some kids. I wouldn’t do private adoption. I will adopt from the Foster Care System or international like from Brazil or some other South American country.  I would be open to adopting a sibling group, if I adopted from  Brazil I would definitely take a sibling group. I wouldn’t be against taking an infant/baby but I wouldn’t get one from a pre-match with a birthmother. It would be an infant/baby from the FCS, already surrendered for whatever reason, or a part of a sibling group. I would also have no problem adopting an older child probably up to 7 or 8 if I adopted in the next 10 to 12 years.

As far as why because I know there are a lot of children out there that need loving homes family, parent(s). It’s what I needed and I got. I don’t feel that blood and genetics is everything in fact I feel that it’s very little. I would not be opposed to having a natural child one day if I meet the right guy but even if I had a biological child it would not deter my want to adopt if able. Just like if I adopt it would not mean that I wouldn’t one day have a natural child as well.  

I have never felt a loss or pain that some adoptees speak of.   That said i am not naive I know if I do adopt that that child(ren) may not be as laid back and alright with it as me. This is why I do appreciate reading everyone’s opinions (good , bad and in between) here and other adoption sites. So that if I do adopt one day I can help my child(ren) in any possible way regardless of whatever part of the spectrum they fall on.

Answer 11

I am an adult adoptee and I cant wait to adopt a child! Alot of people look at me and ask "if I feel I owe that back", and I definitely don't feel any pressure in that way to adopt and I'm not doing it simply because I was adopted. However I have seen my cousins all be adopted and that BY FAR has been the most influential  on my wanting to adopt children of my own and I cant wait to be a mom!

Answer 12

only if i could not have kids naturally.

Answer 13

No I could not adopt.  I could not do to them what was done to me.  Denial of my heritage, Denial of who I really am.

Answer 14

absolutely NOT.  i would never put a child through this.

i had a very happy life. but that does not negate my feelings about adoption.

NEVER.

Answer 15

I an adoptee who is also infertile.  During my early to mid 30's, I considered adopting an older child who was in foster care, but did not do so.  I would never have adopted in the closed adoption system, though.  I knew that an older child would still have a relationship with his/her parents.  

I do think, however, that when we retire, perhaps we could foster.  I'd be fine with that.

Answer 16

Yes! Because I know from personal experience how much those children NEED stable, loving homes.

Answer 17

yes i would definately adopt a child because i would love to give back what i already have. not sure if that makes sense or not but i want to give a child the love that i received during my childhood. i would understand what the child is going through and feeling and i could develop a close relationship with them. =]

Answer 18

No, even though I have been truly blessed with wonderful aparents, I have suffered extreme emotional breakdowns because of a feeling of rejection.  It has negatively affected everyone I have ever developed a relationship with.  I am co-dependant and have no sense of who I really am.  I have lived my life with a huge hole in my heart that no one has ever been able to fill (not even my bmom).

I could not watch my achild go through the same emotional ups and downs.  It would break my heart over and over every day!

Answer 19

yes child  baby

Answer 20

Already have.  And the birthmother of our daughter was adopted.  

Why, because for our family it was the right thing to do.  I wanted a family and was betrayed by my body and the many losses of babies to miscarriages.  We went through our church and we have our daughter now.

Adoption is not perfect and it isn't the most evil thing in this world.  It is a hard choice that is laden with emotion on all sides.

Will I adopt again?  Not in my immediate plans right now, but I don't know what tomorrow will bring.