Adopting Children from China...?

Question

Okaii, when I am older, married or not, i want to adopt some of those poor Chinese children that are in care homes or have been abandoned.

Has anyone else adopted, and is it a simple process?

As these children have been abandoned, will they find it hard to adjust in a new home?

Answer 1

How would you feel if you were abandoned?  I'm pretty sure, yes, they're going to have a hard time adjusting to a lot of things.  Matter of fact, it kind of sucks that THEY have to adjust to anything.  It's not their fault they were abandoned - why should they lose their culture, heritage, food, language, and all other things that are familiar to them, so that they can fulfill the wishes of some stranger half way around the world who doesn't look like them?

http://www.adoptedthemovie.com/

http://onthefaultline.com/

If it's about you, and what you need (i.e. if YOU feel that you need to "save" a baby), don't.  That's a huge burden for a kid to carry...that they were "saved" and "given a better life".  The fact is, their lives would have been just fine if they hadn't been abandoned in the first place.  They needn't be grateful for that.

ETA:  Ok, so you'll look like them and can help them keep their culture.  Fabulous.  The rest still applies.  I say the same thing to Americans adopting in America.  And with that attitude, I'd say for sure, don't adopt.

Answer 2

China have recently tightened up the rules regarding international adoption.  now there are new age limits and you have to have been married for a certain amount of time prior to the adoption.  Most of the children are girls.

Answer 3

I'm an adoptive mother from China and you cannot adopt from China if you are single and China does not recognize common law relationships. You have to be married at least 2 years.

As for the process, it is not physically taxing, nor is it particularly complicated, but it is emotionally draining, but has been worth it. If you were to start the process now, you would be looking at 4-6 years, so I would not reccommend anyone adopting from China until the 30,000+ backlog has been reduced.

WHile it's a nice thought to help children who have been abandoned, I assure you that children in orphanages in China have more than enough people willing to adopt them (hence the backlog).

My daughter (who was just over 9 months) when she was placed in my arms did go through a heavy grieving period , but she bonded with us pretty quickly. We do expect that she will always have questions and feelings regarding her abandonment, which is perfectly natural and needs to be expected and addressed.

And to the people who think that children should languish in orphanages with neglect and malnutrition because at least they are surrounded by people who look like them and speak the same language, please!!! EVERY child deserves a family. Culture will NEVER trump real love and having a family to call your own.

Answer 4

When I am older i hope to find a treasure chest. I know how you feel. I wish there were more out there for everyone because every deserving family deserves orphans.

Until you're older, I would recommend that you go to your school counselor and ask if there are organizations you can volunteer at that support family's in a crisis.

I would focus on helping young girls take care of their children instead of wishing they would give you their baby, like so many church people do.

Answer 5

You have to be 30 and married to adopt from China.  

Of course "those poor Chinese children" (horrible phrasing on your part) will have some adjusting to do.  The degree of it will depend on the child, the conditions of their living quarters, their caregivers, nutrition, etc.  Some will adjust perfectly, others will need lots of counseling.  

Time frame is 3-5 years for non special needs and 7-9 months for special needs.  You have to meet all the requirements before sending in your paperwork, so you can't just send it now and rely on being the minimum age, having the income requirements met, martial status, etc at referral time.

Answer 6

It is not a simple process. It is very costly and takes quite a lot of time.  Consult an agency that specializes in overseas adoption.