Adopting a foster child? Is this possible? Hard to do? How can we do this?

Question

There is a little girl that goes to daycare with my son and we absolutely love her. I am sure the foster parents are doing a decent job with her, but she always wants to be held by us when we come in and we have noticed that, even though their other children go to the same daycare they come and pick them up hours earlier than they get her!!! It kills me. I talked to my husband about adoption, but he said this is a difficult problem because many parents will not sign over their rights and that is why they are foster children to begin with. Is this true? How can I find out more info about her situation and adoption? THanks so much.

Answer 1

in tennessee we have dcs...department of children services. they are the ones in charge of foster care. my parents are foster parents.  you may be able to adopt her or become foster parents and foster her until her biological parents sign their rights over.

Answer 2

children can go to foster care for many reasons. it's usually because of neglect or abuse. without knowing why she is there its hard to say if she's eligible for adoption. Contact the case worker who has her case and they'd be able to let you know if she was available.  The parents just could be sick, or maybe in jail for a bit and have no one to take care of her. But if the child was taken because of abuse or something, then the paernts have 15 months to get their act together in attempts to get her back.

Answer 3

I would contact my local Child Services department, they are mostly likely in charge of her foster care.

Let them know you are interested in caring for the child and see what, if anything, you can do about it.

My bother-in-law and his wife have fostered 3 children that they eventually adopted. One of those mothers had surrendered her rights to the state. The other 2 were abused by their parents, and after a couple of times going back to the parents they continued to be abused, so the state revoked their rights.

Best of luck!!!

Answer 4

Each foster kid has a social worker that you can talk to!!  You need to get her first & last name and call your DSHS office and find out who has her case.  

There are lots of reasons that a foster family would pick up one child and not the other... I do it all the time with doctors appointments and when the foster kids have visitations, etc.  Please do not assume that the foster parents are not giving this girl the absolute best care unless you are positive of this.  

Your best bet to find out her situation is to talk with the social worker.  Kids are often in foster care for a short time, other times they have been switched from home to home.  Sometimes the kids are in the program while parents are getting their act together and will be reunited.  You need to call the social worker and see what the situation.  Also some families are foster to adopt families... the foster family may not want to let you adopt her they might want her to be an addition to their own family.  You best start by getting all the facts before you start making these kinds of decisions.

Also... to adopt a child you have to either get a homestudy through an adoption agency... or you can get licensed through your state to be a foster to adopt family yourself.  This is not an easy task... it takes a huge time commitment to take all the classes you will need, and you will have to learn a lot about the kids that have been neglected or abused before you can invite them into your home.  

It sounds like you have a big huge heart and you would be a good foster parent, I do hope you look into it.  Bless you for caring about the girl; she needs that no matter what her situation.

Answer 5

First thing you need to do is understand that you do have some incorrect information.

Foster children are placed into homes with a goal of reunification with their birth family.

For most foster children, their parents are given a plan to work...such as:  get a job, ditch the unhealthy partner, go to a treatment program, etc.

The parents either work the plan successfully and get their child back, OR they get their rights terminated.

Birth parents CAN appeal termination of their rights...but, many times, it doesn't happen (whether they give up the fight or they do fight and the judge looks at the case again).

I would hook up with the foster parents and simply ask...if this child's parent's rights are terminated, are you going to adopt her?

If they say no, then ask them who they can ask about starting the adoption process (hopefully the child's caseworker) in hopes of adopting this child.

Many times, foster situations are "foster to adopt" which means the foster family accepted the child on the chance they will be able to adopt the child in the future.

You won't know whether she is foster to adopt or straight foster (the family only caring for her until she moves back home or to an adoptive home) unless you ask.

Email me if you wish if you have any more questions.