Adopting....?

Question

I have been with my fiace for almost five years now and we have been talking about him adopting my little girl. We have a son of our own, plus I have a daughter to my firdt marriage. My middle child, the one he wants to adopt has my first daughters dad"s name on the birth certificate but he is not the father. Her father has never been in her life and I have no idea where he is even at anymore. How do I go about getting my first husbands name off her bitth certificate? And how do I go about him adopting my little girl?

Answer 1

GO to an attorney- and do this legally , so that a few years down the road your daughter's birth father cannot come into the picture.  They will try and contact your ex- and put ads in the paper and if within a set time, I believe 60 days, not sure about this, they will terminate his rights.  When we adopted our son 19 years ago, his birth mom did not know were his father was, so they did that to protect the child and us.  Good luck- and I am so glad that your fiancee wants to adopt your precious little girl.

Answer 2

go to court, contact him, and have him terminate rights.

be aware, she will not likely ever own her original birth certificate again.

Answer 3

A birth certificate should be a record of who the child's biological parents are.

Sadly - adoption does change that record - especially in the US - and the original then gets locked away forever - if you live in a sealed record state.

Your daughter will most likely come to feel that your new husband is her only dad - but she still should be allowed to know of her roots - her history - where she came from.

That's part of her.

If and when you do go through with adoption proceedings - please get a copy of her original birth cert before it gets locked away - for your daughters sake.

She deserves to know her truth.

Making it a secret - or even denying the truth - makes it ugly - and shameful.

Be open, be honest, be truthful.

Answer 4

The man listed on her birth certificate should be able to sign a consent to adopt at the attorney's office where the adoption will take place.  If he is willing, it will be a lot easier than doing the DNA thing and tracking down the real father.  In some states, you might have to be married to have him adopt the baby, then he can adopt as a step parent.  It is much easier, as you don't have to have a home study done, and the waiting period is less than normal.  Good luck, and make sure you are ready to have your fiance permanently in your child's life, because if he adopts, it should be a permanent thing, and he could actually sue you for custody if you ever divorced.  If you wouldn't marry him now, I sure wouldn't have him adopt your child.