Adoption. Okay here is my story. Husband and I decided on a domestic adoption, closed or semi open, for a?

Question

white infant. We are going through an agency that is certified of course. Now we need to figure out where the money is going to come from. We are not going through foster care so we need some ideas how to save money and is there a step we missed so far and what do we do next. Also can anyone give any testomonies on open adoptoin and semi open adoption? Any advice on any of this is appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

I did the open adoption and I think it was best for me being a birth mother......I moved out of state when I got married but I never forgot his Birthday or Christmas.....the birth parents said they would only send me updates once a year and I respected that I think it gave me something to look forward to and as a birth mom I always knew that out there somewhere was this child I had and he has a better life than what I could give him....he is now over 21 and I still have contact with him!!

Answer 2

What kind of income do you have? All couples should have some sort of savings account established. The cost of a domestic adoption can be in the $5k range.

Closed adoption is almost unheard of in the United States at this time, because of laws that allow women to change their minds the best option is to leave the mother somewhat involved so she doesn't feel compelled to just come get back the baby.

Have you asked your employers if they reimburse for adoption? My employer pays up to $4000 per year towards adoption, excluding the adoption of step children.

The only ideas I can give you in terms of saving money is cutting back on your expenses immediately and start putting it away.

You also need to think about how you will afford the child- how will you save for retirement, what about college for the child? You may need a financial planner. Even companies like H&R block can help you out with this for a low cost.

Answer 3

I think she meant baNk loan.  Some banks have adoption loans, or some people get a Home Equity line of credit.

Answer 4

I did semi open. I send pictures and updates through the agency to the birth parents. I met the birth mother and she let me be in the labor room. I felt it was best choice for us. I know it was hard for her but she felt it was best. I know she only wants to know the baby is okay.  Don't forget about the income tax adoption credit when income taxes come due and your adoption is final. I think it is up to 12 thousand now. We got a back loan to pay for our adoption

Answer 5

I think there is a flaw in your thinking.....first you decided to become parents through adoption, now you are trying to figure out how you can afford it?

Perhaps you need to try it the other way around......Here is what we can afford, or here is what we are going to try and work toward.  Then, once the goal has been met, pursue parenting!  

(Not sure at all why you mentioned that you are planning on adopting a "white" infant......)

Answer 6

my granddaughter said she is going to adopt a baby and asked me what I was going to be to it, and I told her that I would be nothing to it, I told her that if she adopts a baby I don't want to have anything else to do with her, I think that this is selfish to take babies away from their true parents, I don't know any kid that would say that they want to be away from their parents and I don't know any parent that would not tell you if the child died or got stolen that they didn't hurt over it, I think you are wrong here, but this is my oppinion, have your own baby and then take care of it, in this day and age there is no telling what will happen in the future and even if you will stay married or get a divorce?  there is no sense in this, instead take your time, energy, and extra resources and help a single mom to take care of her baby and raise it help both of them, in the long run it will be better for all

Answer 7

i can't help much with the financial side of it.

but my aunt and uncle adopted through open adoption and i think it is a beautiful thing. its not for everyone...but i think for our family it was an excellent option.

my cousin knows his birth father...and his birth mother has been in touch with my aunt through the years...

he is currently in high school and being openly adopted i think has been really good for him. he doesn't have unanswered questions.

my best friend found herself pregnant and not in a position to raise the baby...after seeing open adoption work in my family she opted to give her baby girl up for adoption. through open adoption she is still in touch with and even friends with the family. she is currently married with a daughter of her own. at her daughters second birthday the adopted daughter and her family was there and everyone had a good time. i think there is less stress for everyone in an open adoption.

Answer 8

This is not a question that we can answer for you. The choices you have to make are between you and the birth mother. What do you want/what does she want? That's the question. Emotionally, what can you/she handle. What is best for your child?

Our adoption is open and it works for us because I knew from the start what I wanted and found the perfect situation for us.It's worked out beautifully.

So, again, what do you want out of this for your family and the child?