Adoptions and custody: I want to adopt my fiance's daughter.?

Question

Ok, so my question is this: Can I adopt my fiancee's daughter?

Here are the details: Her biological father was 19 and she was 15 when they first got together. They did have intercourse but without results of children. At age 17 she did finally get pregnant by him. She told him that she was but he left her anyways. She had her daughter and let him know. He only responded with a threat of: "You will get what is coming to you, just wait and see, you will." Ever since then she has not left her house with her daughter out of fear of him trying something to hurt her or her daughter. I met her and now we are engaged to be married. We are looking at about 2 to 3 years until the weeding. Can I adopt her daughter so she is both of ours and if I do, will he have any rights to her? Also, it has been 18 months since her birth and he does know where she lives but has not tried to make contact to talk about visitation and/or custody. Has he abandoned her? What can we do to protect ourselves?

Answer 1

The biological father would have to give up his rights -this requires her to contact him. But the courts will allow you to adopt once you and her are married and petition the court but only if he signs off. She can tell him by doing this he will not have to pay any more child support (if she has gone to court to ask for child support). If you live in the same town as this man I suggest moving.

Answer 2

Contact a lawyer and have him officially served with papers stating her intention.  He will then have a set period of time (often 30 days) to respond.  He can either sign papers that will terminate his parental rights, or he can petition for visitation/custody/joint custody.  If he fails to do either before the end of the time period, he forfeits his rights.

As far as adopting her children before you are married, you may run into some resistance during the process.  You should get paperwork drawn up that makes you a legal guardian for now, which will allow you to sign papers affecting the child, claim her as a dependent, etc.  After you are married, you would petition for adoption.  Given the situation, it would be relatively inexpensive.

Answer 3

If his name is not on the birth certificate than yes you can adopt her. But what would be best is have a fatiernity test to see if she is. If she is his, then he will have to give up his rights, which he probally will do.

Answer 4

the father has to give up his right to her before you can adopt her, so basically you need to find him and get his permission to do so. Oh and to protect yourselves. . . get an attorney

Answer 5

In most states you need to be married a year. If you go to an attorney they can file an abandoment case. Which means he will have to show up at court and say that he feels he can be a better father than you or he can just not show up. If he desides not to show he has lost all rights. Best of luck to you and your family. But I would tell her to go ahead and go to child support then go get a temporary restaring order against him.

Answer 6

A judge will not necessarily consider him to have abandoned his child. He needs to be legally notified.

First, no, you can't adopt the child until you are married to your fiance.  You also can't adopt the child unless the father either agrees and signs off or unless a judge determines him to be unfit.  The fact that he has not seen her or paid child support does not necessarily qualify as abandonment as the mother has not filed for child support.  The fact that he is not on the birth certificate means nothing in today's world of DNA.  He is still the chid's father.  

You only have one side of the story.  Whether it is true or not doesn't really matter to a judge because s/he hears lies every day on the bench.  What matters is what she can prove. Given that she has not had him served for child support says a lot.  She picked him to father her child.  It's up to her to start getting the child supported.

Answer 7

Abandonment depends on the state you are in - some say it is a year without contact, some it is two.

You can't adopt the child until you are married. In order to adopt, she will have to go to court and file to terminate his rights, which means hiring an attorney & trying to find out where he is so he can be served. If he is charged with abandonment, then his rights will be terminated and you can go ahead with adopting. If her ex shows up in court, and says no to the termination, and requests visitation & custody rights, he can get them.

If you are able to adopt, you will have full rights to the child as if it was your own, and he will have none.

She needs to stop living in fear of a teenager who was upset he found out he had a child. If he hasn't done anything to try to harm her by now, he isn't going to.

Answer 8

The natural father has to fully give up custody for you to be able to adopt your fiancees daughter.  It's commendable, but the natural dad has to give up all his parental rights first.