Adoptive Parents do you support open adoptions or open records?

Question

I just had to ask this question considering the slew of certain questions on here about open records and open adoptions. I want to say that most adoptive parents are very much supportive of an open adoption and open records. In fact most adoptive parents even say they would support their children if they choose to search. So, i want to hear from all the adoptive parents are you for open records or adoption? Adoptees are your parents supportive of your need of records? Just because we want open records it is not a betrayl on you as our parents.

Answer 1

I'm an AP and support both.

Open adoption was the only way I would consider going through the process. I understand that it's not feasible for all adoptions especially those involved with neglect or abuse.

Although open records are not an issue for my child I do feel strongly that everyone deserves the right to know where they came from. Or at least have the right to know if they want to.

Answer 2

100 support both...knowledge is power and that knowledge has the power to heal wounds.

The only way I would not support an open adoption is if the bio parents were abusive.

Answer 3

I am 100% in support of both.

Answer 4

I completely 100% support both open adoptions and open records.  Its what is best for the child.

Answer 5

I am very much for open adoption and open records. That is why I chose to do open adoption when I adopted my son.  I believe that he has the right to know everything up front.  We even see his birthmother 3-4 times a year.  I think if he knows about it and it is out in the open, he will accept it a lot better, and wont be so bitter when he turns 18 etc.  There will never be the questions in his mind as to "where are my parents", "why didn't they want me" etc.

Answer 6

I've always been supportive of open adoptions.

I was uncertain about open records and I received some very good, convincing and non-snarky answers to a question I posed, asking for the justification for it.  

I was convinced, so I now support the open records as well and am grateful for the education opportunity.

Answer 7

I support open records

I wouldn't support all adoptions being required to be open, because some bmoms don't want that contact.. I think the decision of an open adoption should be made by the bmom BUT whatever decision she makes should be enforceable.. If she doesn't want contact, that should be notated in the records, with the understanding that she can call the agency any time down the road and add a notation saying she's changed her mind about that.. So the child at age 18, (who was told at age 16 his bmom had made a "no contact" note in his file), could contact the agency and see if she'd changed her mind.. I dunno... don't know how to do it the "smoothest" and most ethical way, but something like that..

I would support my children in a search..

Answer 8

Absolutely.  My daughter is an international adoptee with a semi-open adoption.  We have all her records and she will know everything we know.  We got to meet her birthparents.  I hope someday she can reunite with them again, as well as with other members of her biological family.  In fact, I find myself wanting her to want to reunite.  Is that weird?  I actually am afraid of unconciously putting pressure on her to persue it someday.  

By the way, healing, I'm glad you're back! :)

Answer 9

Both.....what may be important to my child someday is important to me today.

Answer 10

I am torn on this.  In theory, I do support open adoptions and open records, but I do worry about certain cases - like in my son's case - where neglect/abuse was involved.

I support open adoption if both parties agree to it.  I do not however feel that either the bio parents or adoptive parents should be forced into it.  If an adoptive parent does not wish to have an open adoption, then there should be choices available to them (perhaps like foster care) just as a bio parent has choices when they make an adoption plan for their child.  HOWEVER, once the type of adoption is established (whether open or closed), I feel that both sets of parents should be required to follow through with that agreement unless there is a valid reason to change things, in which case I think that an advocate for the child should be appointed and the decision should be made by an unbiased person.

I know that I am not with the "group" in my thoughts.  But I do have to look at things from a protective parent's point of view because of my son's situation.  I would rather receive 1000 thumbs down for my opinion than to see my son have to suffer because of laws that are put in place to help others.  But again, that is only because of his situation both prior to and after he was born.

Answer 11

open adoption

Answer 12

Yes I an in support of both.

I made sure to get a copy of my children's original birth certificate to be sure they would always have access to it.

Recently my husband found out he has two older siblings that were adopted before he was born. He 39years old and his mother just told him last month.

It is heart breaking to find out his sister has been searching for her bmom for 14 years. When we learned of her I googled her name and found and article she was in saying she had been searching for a few years. When I read that and saw the date was 1998, it brought tears to my eyes.

If his sister never found her I don't think his mom would have ever told him about his other siblings.

We are going to meet her this weekend and they both seem excited to get to know one another.

I also support open adoptions but I think it is a personal decision.

I communicate often with my children's birth family members.

Answer 13

Completely supportive. You adult adoptees are who our children will be one day.

Answer 14

I am in support of both; however, my children will not have total "open" adoption due to their safety.  (they are older children adoption)  The parents will receive regular updates from me but the court has said no contact with kids and birth parents.

Answer 15

I am fully supportive of open records for adoptees.  I have retained every piece of info that I have on my son's birthparents and hope that I can aid him if he decides to seek them out when he is older.  No adoptee should be denied access to their birth history.

Answer 16

10000000000%  support adoption and open records.  I am a reunited adult adoptee who has also adopted one of my 4 children.  

When my daughter decides to search one day, to find her bio-family, I totally support her, I will pay for it and be there for her and what ever else she needs so that she knows all about herself and her roots.  She knows everything that my husband and I know.  It will always be that way.  No secrets, no lies.  It is what it is.