Adoptive parents: Has your job been threatened by your choice to adopt?

Question

An answerer in another question prompted me to ask this. I had trouble at work, even though my leave was CLEARLY under FMLA. I argued with my boss that my son always comes first and she siad my work should. I will never say work comes first. Never. It's amazing how many boss' are so mean and selfish!

My boss got in trouble but it was a tiny slap on the hand because management has a way to hide things under their carpet.

Answer 1

Personally, I don't think that has anything to do with adopting as I know plenty of people who have issues with their job understanding that they have a family at home that comes first. That's just more of a general issue people have depending on how much of an a $$ their boss is. Fortunately, my boss is awsome when it comes to having a flexible schedule with my child.

Answer 2

YES!!!!!

The c**p I get is more like" well you CHOSE to have this 'problem'" Referring to my son who is frequently ill. As if, if he were born to me they would be understanding, but because I chose to bring him into my life knowing his problems, I am punished.

The other day, the woman who is BL**ING my boss said "taking care of a sick parent in much harder than taking care of any sick kid" AS IF I have EVER compared my son to her father.

Thank God I have a government job, otherwise I would have been outta there.

Answer 3

My husband's previous employer gave him a hard time during our first adoption. He to was eligable for FMLA, but several members of management tried to tell him that he couldn't take off more then a day or two because they were too busy, and "Just because you adopt a kid doesn't mean you should be able to take time off". One of the members of management had just taken off several weeks when his wife gave birth too. My husband was able to take leave after talking to HR though.

The funny thing is that his former employer is listed on the "top adoption-friendly workplaces list!

Answer 4

I had trouble with my employer also.  Our adoption was with someone that we know so I was able to be around my child for months before she was born.  So in my case I was able to tell my employer the due date around 3-4 months ahead of time.  When  the doctor scheduled the c-section I called my boss and told them.  They responded by telling me they were scheduled for vacation that week so they didn't know what to tell me.  When the birth mother went into labor early I didn't give them the chance to give me trouble.  I called them from the hospital and told them that I was fixing to go in to the delivery room and that I wouldn't be at work for at least 2 weeks.  I lost alot of respect for my boss's during this time.