Advice for a 1st time mother....?

Question

Hi everyone! I am 38 weeks and 1 day pregnant and I would love if you shared some advice that you wish someone had told you. Whether it be about labor, bringing home a new baby, or anything within the subject. lol

Thank you!

Answer 1

Breastfeed as long as you can (to a year, unless you want to go further), and stay home if you can.  And have your next baby (if you plan to have a next baby) before this one turns 2.  Your children will be much happier for it, and your oldest will never be jealous of the new baby.

Answer 2

My mom used to tell me that if your baby is crying and fussy all day keep telling yourself that it is because one. your baby wants you to cuddle, which is adorable, or two. they don't feel good. I would just keep telling myself that when I got frustrated and honestly it really helped me...Because the thought of your baby not feeling good just breaks your heart and makes you want to love them up all you can...and the thought that they want you to cuddle them is just so wonderful. It takes patience but just remember it goes by so fast that you can't even believe it when they turn 6 months. Cherish every second because as soon as they are semi mobile around 6 months they just want to go go go...and they don't want to cuddle.

Don't worry about if your house is clean everyday, I have ocd so it was very hard for me at first to deal with my house even having one thing out of place, and I was constantly cleaning, but now I realize, who cares if all my laundry isn't done, or there are dishes, My daughter is loving my attention and that makes you feel way better at the end of the day then having a clean house.

Take a shower everyday, even when your not doing anything, it makes you feel so much better in a time when you kinda feel trapped in your house with you child somedays.

Take time to yourself, don't feel like a bad mom when you get frustrated because everyone does, just put the baby in a safe place and go in a different room and relax, listen to music, whatever makes you feel sane again.

Take your baby for walks as much as possible, it is good for you, makes you feel good about yourself, gets you that fresh air, it calms the baby and makes them sleep better, and it is good for them.

Don't let anyone tell you what to do with your baby, If you want to formula feed that is great! If you want to breast feed that is great too! If you want to use disposable diapers go for, if you want to vaccinate your child do it, if not don't. Don't let anyone else tell you what is best for your baby, Only you know!

Give them little tastes of your food, they love it and it is so cute to watch how excited they get! And my daughter loves fruits and veggies more than any sugary and salty thing I have ever given her. She prefers them to anything else. So let them love all foods.

And lastly take any help you can get, don't refuse it because you want to be a super mom, everyone needs help and there is nothing wrong with that.

Good luck and love up your angel as much as possible!

Answer 3

I just had a baby on July 7th, and I went through my labor and delivery with no drugs of any kind, it is painful, but if you can, try to do it!  Remember, everything that goes into your body goes into the baby.  

Answer 4

I planned to breastfeed (and am so glad that I did; I wish I had kept it up longer!) but I was not interested in getting instruction on how to do it "correctly."  I convinced myself that it was natural and that my daughter would know what to do.  Six weeks later, I was still crying every single time I had to feed her.  I wasn't getting my nipple far enough into her mouth.  I wish I had asked for instruction from the lactation consultant at my hospital.  

Along the same lines, I didn't know to ask for someone to show me the correct way to clean around her umbilical cord.  By the time her cord fell off, it had become infected because I hadn't been cleaning it properly.  Might want to get a nurse to show you that as well!!

When you are packing for the hospital, I would take one preemie outfit with you.  Unless your baby is well over 8 lbs, a newborn outfit will probably be too big.  I think baby clothes are made bigger now than they used to be and newborn clothes (or 0-3) really doesn't seem to fit babies during their first few days.

And finally, the same stuff that probably everyone will tell you.:

Don't hold the baby 24/7.  It's hard to put them down, but you have to or they'll expect to be held forever.  

Don't get the baby all the way to sleep before putting them in the bed.  If you lay the baby down groggy, he/she will learn to fall asleep on his or her own and sleeping through the night will come easier to them.  

Give the baby a dose of infant Tylenol or Motrin the night before and the morning off any shots -- this will help prevent or at least reduce side effects.

Regardless of what the doctor tells you (unless your baby has a medical need for eating on a  very strict schedule) you don't need to wake the baby up to eat.  Babies know to eat when they are hungry and they will most definately let you know when they are ready.

Hold off on offering your baby table foods.  This was my mom's mantra when my daughter was born, and I'm so glad I listened to her.  Other babies her age refuse to eat fresh fruits and veggies because they already have a taste for sugars, salts, fats, etc.  My daughter loves her fruits and veggies.  If you offer what we consider to be the "good" stuff early on, your baby will likely refuse baby food.

Always keep spare clothes, diapers, wipes, a pacifier, sippy cup, etc. in the trunk of your car.  You just never know.  I did this religiously until my daughter turned 1 and then I stopped because I never needed them.  Earlier today my daughter managed to destroy her entire outfit and I had to go buy something for her to wear because I didn't still have a spare outfit in the car.  I should take my own advice.  :-)

Answer 5

A mom's gut feeling is usually right.  A mom knows her baby better than anyone.  Read books for a reference not the gospel.  Every child is unique and cannot do things exactly like another.  Take advice and ideas for what they are but apply them to you child and your family and how it works for you.  GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

Relax, this too will pass.

Answer 7

Hey Sweets...Im A 21 and I just recently delivered (June 1)my baby boy Antari he was 6lbs,11oz...my best advice I can give you is during your deliver any drugs that are  offered from your doctor take them,take them,take them...lol...see I tried that whole natural birth thing and it sucks so bad,I tried to listen to the grandparents of my child and I suffered for it...but all is well now he's healthy and beautiful...

Answer 8

Well, that's an easy one! :)

YOUR baby is not in any book and will not be like any other child.  So if you read something or are given advice that doesn't sound right to you or like it just will not work for your child, go with your instincts on that.  NO ONE (including, by the way, your pediatrician) will know your child better than you! :)

Also...STOP everything on a regular basis and just enjoy your child..look at them, live in the moment...while it may seem that time drags on and on due to lack of sleep or whatever, don't be fooled.  It's FLYING by and you will miss your baby even as soon as when they're 3.

Don't trust yourself to remember things and so to write them in the baby book later.  You will forget things.  The best idea I can tell you is to invest in a few squares of post it notes.  That way you can write things down quickly and then just stick it inside your baby book for a time when you'll have more time to write it in the book nicely.

My daughter is about to be 5...she still has never tasted soda pop.  She loves and has cravings for milk, water, iced tea...

Also, the only time she had candy until she was three was when she went to the doctor or on Halloween, she got a sucker, that was it.  She had cake on her birthday, that was it.  So her "treats" were fruit, yogurt, stuff like that...and that is what she asked for when she wanted a treat and often still does to this day.  Awesome! :)  She's SUCH a healthy eater now!  (Even now, after she's started to have candy and sweets.)

When she got old enough to "ask" for her bottle (ba-ba) I figured if she could ask for it, she was too old for it.  I took it away...gave her sippy cups and never had any issues at all.  So many kids get addicted to the bottle and are still sucking on it until they're three.  Megan had no issues at all.  Let go of the bottle, picked up the sippy cup and never looked back! :)

And the biggest thing, for me, is that you aren't just becoming the parent to a child...you'll have to parent adults, too.  A very wise woman told me that...Windy, a native american, so wise, who has now passed away.  You'll maybe have to make some adults mad or offend them or send them away when your baby needs a nap or whatever.  She told me that...and it's true.  So don't be afraid of that...just do what's right for you and your baby and everyone else will get over it.  There was once that I'd had trouble getting Megan down for nap.  We were at grandma's so she just wasn't settling the way she normally did.  Well, then someone showed up that didn't get to see Megan very often.  Everyone was telling me, she's here, she's here...just let her go in and look at her, let her see her.  I kept saying no...and had to kind of get forceful, to be honest.  Then I went into the next room and the guest was there...I walked up to her and apoligized that I couldn't let her see Megan, that'd I'd had a hard time getting her down.  That woman looked right at me and told me not to worry about it and then she went on to give me the great advice of not worrying about/parenting the adults...that was Windy. ;)

Good luck with your new sweetie!! :)  SO fun!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 9

Breastfeed or pump... Its the only thing in life that's free (Formula is not cheap)... ITs a lot harder than I thought, but even more wonderful than I thought. Don't sweat the little stuff. Remember to be patient with your spouse/partner they really are trying!!!!

Answer 10

having a child is the best thing in life having a baby will hurt but they make meds for that. ive been trying to have one for a couple years now for some reason i cant have one kinda making me sad . any way you will love being pregnant the late night kicks in your tummy and hearing the heart beat itll be wonderful. when u have it ill be great  take lots of vitamans and eat healthy.  

Answer 11

it takes a lot of patience and a whole lot of  sleepless nites lol but its the best thing ever and well worth it.good luck

Answer 12

lol i love the first answer! Be paitent and don't be afraid to ask for help. Good luck!

Answer 13

if you plan to breastfeed, the first two weeks are hard...but don't give up. If you don't plan to breastfeed, the first two weeks are hard...but don't give up!!! LOL. It gets easier once you really get to know your baby...you'll quickly learn when your baby is hungry, tired, or has a dirty diaper. Good luck!

Answer 14

You can never have enough burp cloths, bibs or onesies. Also, having a baby swing will make your life a lot easier!