Advice for anger/frustration...?

Question

I find myself getting really wound up / annoyed by the way people around me act, like girls bitching about eachother behind their backs, or lazy people not pulling their weigh at work or at school, small things, that usually have nothing to do with me, i know i shouldnt care but i find my self gettin so angry or frustrated about these things, does anyone have any advice?

Answer 1

this is stolen from http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com/counselingarchive-types-of-anger.asp

"Moral Anger: Some people think they have a right to be angry when others have broken a rule. That makes the offenders bad, evil, wicked, sinful. They have to be scolded, maybe punished. People with this anger style feel outraged about what bad people are doing. They say they have a right to defend their "beliefs." They claim moral superiority. They gain the sense that anger is for a good cause. They don't feel guilty when they get angry because of this. They often feel superior to others even in their anger. These people suffer from black-and-white thinking, which means they see the world too simply. They fail to understand people who are different from themselves. They often have rigid ways of thinking and doing things. Another problem with this anger style is crusading - attacking every problem or difference of opinion with moral anger when compromise or understanding might be better."

Now whether or not some or all of those things apply to you, i think a more constructive way to look at yourself is that you want people to live up to your standards.  From that point forward, realize that people aren't you and have no idea what your standards are so they cant begin to live up to them.  You may try to enforce the standards you feel are required in situations in which you should be in control and let the other situations go.  You are not the decider in the lives of others. Unless of course, you enjoy the anger that comes with feeling superior to others.