Advice for my out of control child!!?

Question

i need some advice from other mommies that know what to do.i have a 4 yr old daughter that doesn't listen to me and her daddy..my daughter gets into things that she knows not to touch and we tell her and she says she's sorry etc..now my little angel throws a huge fit and starts kicking me and hitting me...why is this happening? i discipline her and all and now this starts...i tell her i don't like what she does and i don't want her to do it again,but today she just did it again,when i went to discipline her?i'm a good mommy but she's making me feel so very bad,i don't know what to do..please help he?

Answer 1

Based on what you have said. I noticed that your style is ineffective to your child when you don't do something other than telling her not to do certain things. Sometimes, to be a good parent makes us to punish our children according to the mistake and their age in order to remind them that doing that thing is bad. Especially to children because they are so perceptive and they really listen to what you have said and done. If you are weak in imposing something to be done. Your child knows it and she will never tend to follow you whatever you say. She might just say sorry but eventually forget it next time. However, if you are strong to punish them according to their age and mistake, they will always keep that in mind and remember everything that you've tell them. Of course, in doing this, it should be in a nice way and do not over-punish them. You should have to show them too how to do things correctly to guide them.

Answer 2

Well I'm not a mom yet, but I am very good with toddlers!

When they are around 4 that's their bratty stage (Trust me, I was with my little cousin then!) But you have to stop it before it gets out of control!  I would make a chart that says something like... When you do something good, and behave you get a sticker on the chart, but if you do something bad, then you take the sticker away, and when she gets a certain amount then she gets a prize! Try watching Super Nanny! It's good!

Answer 3

I agree with the person that suggested watching Super Nanny.  When you discipline her what are you doing, spanking, time out, lecturing?  I am trying to be a "love & logic" parent and it sounds like whatever discipline method you're using is actually reinforcing her behavior.  Another theory is that she wants attention and is pushing your buttons in order to get your attention.  

My lil cousin is 4 and she doesn't listen to her Mom but I think it's because a) she get 1/2 hour lectures which are going right out the window so why listen if you don't have to and b) she'll threaten to give a spanking about 15-20 times before actuallly doing it.

Answer 4

All you can do is stay consistent. Put her in the naughty chair every time she breaks a rule, even if you don't feel like dealing with it or it doesn't seem like it's working. Eventually it will sink in. If she gets up before her 4 minutes is up then send her back. If you walk by when she's in time out and she hits you or something then start the clock over. Let her sit there for an hour if you have to. And don't let her make you feel bad about it- I know it probably sounds mean but it's not- you're teaching her how she needs to behave. She's testing you to see what she can get away with so stick to your guns. As parents sometimes we have to be the  bad guy but it's for their own good. Just put your foot down because you're in a power struggle and if you lose then you're screwed for the next 15 years! LOL. I feel for you-4 is a tough age. Also try as hard as you can to catch her doing something right and tell her. Positive reinforcement of the behavior you want to see will go a long way. Good luck & hang in there! My son went through a phase like that and now he's 5 and a lot easier to reason with so it does get better! =]