Me and my I guess soon to be ex gf split up. We both have kids from our past marrages. She has 3 boys and I have two. Well she felt that I should no emotions and I had issues from my past that made me do thi (bottled up). Also she talks how I didn't do things with her kids and show them that I was glad the did things like honor roll. Well it was hard when she alway stepped in and speak for them when I asked them a question about something they did and not let them speak for them selves. Well I acted distant to her cause she was all hateful to my kids at time. She say they disrespected her from the start. Her did the same. We really did communicate about these issues. We both see that our kids has issues from the past and need counciling for this. I got me and mine set up to go and got them involed in church too. We both treated our childern horribly. She said they thanked her for moving. I never told her these things until tonight cause I sat down with my boys and told them that we might get back together someday in the further. They both try to hold back like me and bottled up. I told them that it was ok to cry and we need to talk about this stuff. They talked about how she treated them and picked on my oldest sonn all the time. She and my oldest fault all the time. I figured that he was angry cause his mother abandon them 8 years ago and has not talked to them since. Well he talked about how she talk to him and try to fight him. I didn't know it. There is a differents between discipline and putting your hands on them. She also pushed my youngest in the back. They both say that her kids always say they did stuff to them and get them introuble. The say that she hated them. She cuss at them all the time. We both did that. I stopped since I asked God to come into our lives. My youngest said she went to church and cussed. I can go on and on about things she did in front of me and Lord only knows what she did behind my back. I don't know if they are telling me the truth or making it up to keep us from getting back together. Well I told her about the time she left him at school and made him walk home and I didn't tell her that the school called and complained that she cussed him out and made him walk (until today). I put it on the back burner like the past and not say anything. I remember a few monthes ago he wispered that her and her kids teased him and he was upset. She came in wanting to know what he was say all defensive. He cried when she wouldnt let him eat the food they were having. when she heard me ask him what was going on she jumped in their and said I told him to wait. She told him that she was going to do nothing for him anymore.Things like that. I know that I am rambling. Sorry. Well after texting back and forth I talk about how she treated my kids not in all detail and she told me that I did what I did because you didnt help me with them. You never wanted to disipline yours so yeah I was mean and forceful thinking you step in. The worst I did to her kids was puddled their butts. I felt bad after wards. Once was for fighting each other, her oldest and my youngest. The other was her youngest for hitting other kids in school. Other then that I have not spank them and don't have to do mine cause they don't disrespect me. They never did while we was together. I know we both was mean from time to time to them, but when you feel that someone hated your kids you act funny too.She wants to know why in 3 years you now want to change. Now I relize alot of the reasons why I acted the way I did working all the time supporting the both of us and feeling the hate she has for my kids and she say she don't.We both are getting counciling and going to church and after we work on our kids then work on us. At first I feel it is my fault for this happening to us, but after seeing my kids both cry and say how they was treated i don't know anymore. Now I question myself what to do. Well what you think? I don't know what to think or do cause I am so wrapped up in loving her. We both are getting counciling and going to church and after we work on our kids then work on us. After talking to them tonight I am very sad, hurt, angry, and confused right not. She left with no money or place to go shacked up with a so called male friend until her apartment opens up since her mom kided her out, cause she was moving too. Always putting the blame on me. I don't know who falt it is anymore. Give me some advice please on what to do. Sorry for rambling.
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